Just Breathe

Chapter Twenty Seven

If she were a good friend she would've already known what to grab Justin at Starbucks. But, as recent occurrences showed, Lia was definitely lacking in the good friend department so she had no idea what he'd want. A peace offering in the form of a hot chocolate was all she could come up with.

Lia waited nervously on a bench at East River Park the next afternoon after school, her own hot chocolate in hand. Would Justin think it was childish to bring hot chocolate? It was such a juvenile drink wasn't it? She wished she knew more about sophisticated hot beverages to be able to order something fancy like espresso or cappuccino. Right now, though, she needed comfort and what wasn't more comforting than hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

The first days back at school had been rough. As someone who hated being the center of attention, it had been a bit of a nightmare to have students and teachers alike congratulating her dad and how cool it was that she got to be there. And what was Weird Al like? He was hilarious, by the way.

All day she'd had a rock in her gut, wondering how Justin might act at their first meeting. The phone call had gone reasonably well, but Lia knew she'd been in the wrong by lying about her identity. Would he feel like he couldn't trust her after such a big lie? He didn't seem like the type but what if he blabbed her secret to the rest of the group or, worse, the media? Just as her thoughts were starting to race she saw Justin walking quickly through the entrance. Her face lit up.

"Justin!" She called, giving him a timid wave when he looked up. He gave her a nod and a half smile. However, she could tell instantly that  he looked stressed.

He took a seat next to her and let out a big sigh. He was going to dump her wasn't he? They hadn't even officially been dating in the first place but this felt like the beginning of a break up.

"What's wrong?" She asked him immediately, searching his face for any clue about what he was thinking.

Justin ran a hand over his hair, not sure how much to tell Lia. The mess that was his family was enough to scare anyone anyway.  He'd started to become numb to it in recent months; if he lost a friend over it he didn't much care.  But Em - Lia - somehow this was different.  If she ran, he wasn't sure he could handle another blow.

"Um..." he felt his nerves shoot up, wondering if he should let her in.  No, it was still too early.  She'd freak out.  "Don't worry about it."

It was obvious to Lia something was bothering him.  "Listen, Justin, I'm really sorry about how I handled all this," she started.  "If you don't want to see me anymore-"

"No, it's not that," he told her, finally making eye contact.  His eyes were stressed; pained.  It seemed like he wanted to continue, but something was stopping him.  Lia put down her hot chocolate on the ground and took his right hand between hers.  Warmth.

"Then what is it?" She asked gently, rubbing her top hand over his.  Her eyes pleaded with his to open up.

Justin looked at her for a few long moments, but then psyched himself out.  "Look, I totally get how you didn't want to tell the group who you were," he expertly changed the subject.  "Having a famous parent must be exhausting, and you're entitled to your privacy."

Lia nodded gently, relieved that he seemed to understand.  But his behavior so far still left a sick feeling to her stomach.  Something was still wrong.

"But when we started hanging out I should've told you," she confessed.  "And I should've told you my real name."

"You had your reasons," he acknowledged.

"I'm still really sorry," she told him gently.  Lia began to rub his wrist, his forearm, with her hand, hoping something would work to soothe whatever it was he was feeling.  She had a feeling it wasn't just her doing, but she was clueless as to what it might be.