Fantasy (Sebastian x reader)

The Date

I'm back everyone finally back!!!
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(Y/N) pov
        I kept glancing over at Sebastian his hands balled up into fists. What was his problem? He's the one who cheated. HES the one who broke MY heart.
"You can't have it both ways" I whispered to myself but I kept looking at him.
"Um... ms (Y/N)?" Finny spoke to me and I returned my attention to him. "What were you saying? About both ways?"
I stammered "Um. just. that was.... Oh I was wondering where we should go.... to eat food or go for a walk, but I thought we could have it "BOTH WAYS" with a..... oh! A picnic!" Finnys eyes never left me. "Yeah a picnic!" Finny held his hands up into tiny fists excited about the idea. "I love picnics I'll go ask Bard to see if he will make us lunch!" And with that he was off like lightening.
I let out a sigh of relief. Honestly I'm not sure what I'm thinking. Finnys cute but do I actually like him that way? Is this just a way to get back at Sebastian?? The LAST thing I want to do is hurt that poor boys feelings. I reached up to my head and took off the cat ears. As much as I enjoy wearing this it'll always be a reminder Sebastian still owns me. I throw them on the ground and head inside to get ready for my.... date. I'm not sure what's going to happen but I do know it's a distraction non the less.
I make eye contact with Sebastian as I walk by. As soon as I pass him I stop, my back still facing him. "I'm sure you can handle everything without me and Finny here for a while."
"Ki-.....(Y/N) enjoy your date. Don't worry about us I am simply One Hell of a Butler" I look over my shoulder and Sebastian bows lightly.
"I know" I whisper and walk up the steps into the manor. I'm going on a date with the cutest little guy here... so why does my heart still ache?
     I went to my room to get ready my heart felt heavy. It felt as if 12 boulders were placed upon my chest. I gripped my shirt and leaned against the door. Screw this. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to have fun. And if I can't be happy here any longer I'll find a way to leave. I went and got changed into my dark blue dress with long white sleeves, and headed back outside. Finny and I agreed to stay near the manor for emergency purposes. I constantly felt a dark gaze from behind us but I ignored it. We sat down near the roses where I had fallen that day. We sat in silence for a long time not sure what we should say to each other. I hugged my knees and just stared off into the distance. The wind swept my (h/l) (h/c) behind my ears. It was a beautiful day. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. As I exhale I could feel the weight being slowly lifted above me. And as if it got heavier Finny broke the silence.
"Ms. (Y/n)? The first day you came here... where did you come from??"
  "From up there." I spoke before I could think. Finnys eyes got huge "Up??? Where????" He looked up then back at me. "You're an angel?!?!" I just smiled at him.
"I believe we all were at one point and hopefully will be again. But I can't really remember much of where I came from. It must have been so boring I forgot all about it!" I laughed it off.
But I did remember. I remembered my friends. Wearing shorts, eating hot wings, yelling at family feud with mom. Gawking at Sebastian with my best friend Ellie... oh how I wish I could talk to her now. Tell her I met him, and he's not as amazing as we made him out to be. I looked up and saw Sebastian from Ciels office window. Screw him. How dare he stare at Finny with hatred he's so sweet. I opened the basket and found a few strawberries.
  "Here Finny say Ah!" I held a strawberry infront of his lips. He opened his mouth.
  "AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" I placed it between his teeth and he took a huge bite.... This boy can eat! I look back up and see Ciel standing with Sebastian looking down at us.
   "Was is good?" I smile at him.
   "It was great Ms (Y/n)" with his mouth full. He was blushing but still chewing.  I saw Pluto looking all sad and lonely so I threw him a strawberry. He ran and caught it before it hit the ground. That seemed to perk him up a bit. Once we had finished our sandwiches we played hide and seek. Finny was terrible at this game. We had so much fun together. Ciel soon came out of a carriage and requested my company for a long trip we will be taking.... I must have been so distracted I didn't notice him leave. I look at Finny.
  "It's okay Ms (y/n) The master is always number one priority." He beamed he was so happy.
   "Thank you Finny" I give him a quick peck on the cheek and run towards the carriage. Sebastian was standing there with a hairbrush. I gave him a questioning look.
  "For the leaves in your hair maid." He bluntly stated. I took the brush and hopped inside right beside young master. Ciel smirked.
"So.... Is that your new love interest?" I wrinkled my nose and squinted.
"No! But you could be." I put my hand on his.
He just stared at me blushing "Gag". We laughed at each other and then everything went silent.
I did have fun but it wasn't romantic. I didn't feel a spark, butterflies, or anything else besides happy. Is happiness enough though? Should I give this thing with Finny a try??? I saw Sebastian glancing over at me from the corner of my eye and my heart pounded. This was what I was missing. My stomach started to feel uneasy. Maybe it was butterflies or a reaction from Bards cooking...... whose bright idea was it to let him cook anyway? I still love you Sebastian. The worst part of it all is you still know that and just don't care.

Sebastian POV
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How could you go out with another man. Kiss another man. Feed him. And not think about me once. Almost as if I mean nothing to you anymore. Is that true? Do I mean nothing to her? Just a distant memory? You both will regret this I assure you.