After Forever (a Twilight Saga fanfiction: 10 years after Breaking Dawn)

42 ◦ Beginning of the End (RPOV)

January 26th 2017

Everyone was out hunting and Jake was still with Billy. I kept myself busy by roaming our new home, memorizing every detail and rearranging some of the decor.

The small library in the corner of my living room was my favorite part of the entire place. It mostly held all of Mom's books that she loved while she grew up. She even left little notes in the margins, which made them mean all the more to me.

I got a phone call from Kalona yesterday. I hadn't talked to him since a few days before my wedding; he was just checking to see how everything was going. I felt badly for not treating him the way a friend should be treated.

To be fair, we haven't known each other long. Our interactions have been kind of few and far between. Nonetheless, he was the type of person I'd like to be friends with. I've always loved humans.

I'm sure our friendship will be real once my internship starts at the end of summer. I was looking forward to it.

Feeling hungry, I made my way to the kitchen. It was fully stocked, of course. Even if Mom and Dad didn't constantly worry about keeping me satiated, being married to a wolf who ate around the clock kept it chock-full of groceries.

Just thinking about Jacob and the word 'married' gave me butterflies. I felt a flutter in the pit of my stomach.

I opened the fridge and looked for something semi-appetizing. As appetizing as it could be without being blood, that is.

My hand flew to my abdomen. Another flutter. But it was different. My hand moved to my mouth and I took a deep breath.

I've never felt sick before. Not even when I was a baby. I tried to take another deep breath before panicking.

But I was kidding myself. Of course I panicked.

What could this mean?

Was Nahuel wrong? Were he and his sisters just lucky? Or was I the only unfortunate one, handed the raw end of the hybrid deal? Am I not going to live forever? Will I have to leave my family?

I just got happy. This couldn't be happening...

One heavy tear wept from my eye and I held my lungs still.

If this were true, if there were something wrong with me, there's no way I'm going to let my family carry the burden with me. I'll have to hide this from my father, keep it locked away in my head.

I let out a shaky breath and just took an apple from the fruit bowl.

I really hope Jake will be home soon. I haven't talked to him since before I went to sleep.

Feeling this uneasy, I knew he'd be the only thing that could calm me.

But this is probably best. I didn't want to lie to him, to anyone, but I needed to get this all out by myself so I could tuck it neatly away in the back of my mind.

I let my mind wander elsewhere. Memories of my honeymoon flooded my senses. Everything was so bright on the island, so colorful and warm. Being there felt right. Like Jake and I were home. I'd honestly never seen him so carefree before.

I was pretty sure it was because he has spent my whole life trying to protect me. On the island, nothing could hurt me. There was nothing to save me from. He could be himself, without the overbearing instinct that comes with the bond of Imprinting.

Maybe it was for a reason, him Imprinting on me. Maybe I wasn't invincible. Maybe a part of him knew I had an expiration date.

I sighed. How was I possibly going to keep this out of my thoughts long enough to evade my dad's?

I only had two options here and I hated them both. One, lie. I make excuse after excuse when it comes to spending time with him, at least until I knew I could successfully keep my mind off it... Two, tell them the truth, and live with the fact that I made everyone unhappy.

Or maybe I'm just wrong about this whole thing and this is me being dramatic. I am my father's daughter, after all. So I got a little nauseated for half a second, so what? There's probably just something going bad in the refrigerator.

I laughed at myself. That had to be it. There was no way I could be ill. I was a vampire, for crying out loud. The only human traits I have are growth and a functional digestive system.

I decided to occupy myself with some art. Nothing major, just some watercolor to add to my portfolio.

Being so used to a loud and eventful family, I felt kind of lonely. I've never been by myself longer than a few hours.

This is the longest I've gone without seeing Jacob. It's odd. I thought the opposite would happen once we got married. He told me it made him anxious to be away from me, so I knew what he and Billy were dealing with was really important.

Not really thinking about it, my paint brush trailed over the canvas into the silhouette of a wolf. It was mostly pastels, but it had a dark aspect to it. I couldn't place why, but it felt like someone else was controlling my hand.

Jake seemed concerned about something. He left to see Billy yesterday morning and was pretty hush-hush about the reason. I'd felt him staring at me the past few days, and not the way he usually does. More as if I were the reason for this long visit to La Push. He's never not asked me to come with him.

There was another wolf now. They were both small and under a grand fir tree.

I smiled. No matter how lost in my mind I am, my foremost thought is always him.

- - -

Author's Note// (Also, I know this chapter is short. It's just a filler chapter so I can get to the next big plot of the story.)

I'm really sorry for not updating as faithfully as I used to. I still love to write, life has just been busy and any chance I've gotten at free time, I've been using to write my own book (not a fanfiction) and do some film editing. I work Wednesday through Sunday, Mondays are when I catch up on sleep, and Tuesdays are when I get things done around the house that I need to (clean, laundry, grocery shopping, etc) I'm not gonna make any promises because obviously, that hasn't worked out so I'll just say this: your support on my stories here mean the world to me. Your kind words and your anticipation for new chapters are the only reason I'm here or still here after all these years. I'm not a kid anymore and I'm still trying to figure out a good work/life balance. I do plan to finish writing this story until the very end (with the way I have it planned, there should be around 100 chapters!) and to afterwards start the sequel, "If Forever Ends". Thank you for your patience and I hope you continue this little journey with me. Twilight will always hold a special place in my heart and so will all of you. ❤️🍎