026. His Misery
——————————————————
W O N W O O ' S
"Yah. It's not healthy to lock yourself up." I heard hyung knocking from the other side of the room. Sighing for the nth time, before getting up from bed.
How can I not do this when my life is too miserable? It's better this way, I should try to be alone and care less about the things and the people around me. It hurts when the people you care about are leaving you one by one. The essence of caring is pain. Thus, when you started caring, your feelings would be tested. Your heart would be shattered and it will leave you nothing, but yourself under your own solitude.
So now, what's the essence of caring? It's more of a sword, it can satisfy your being, nevertheless it could hurt you and leave wound that won't be fading.
I slowly opened the door, revealing my older and younger brother with a concerned look. Leaning against the door frame, with a blank expression. I stared at them like nothing.
"Hyung, you're not planning to follow Areum noona, right?" Sunoo, my younger brother asked, stepping forward near me.
And that hit me once again, I finally remembered the reason why I was locking myself up. My colorful life turned upside down as it got covered in darkness. She's already gone. I didn't even got the chance to confess but she chose to be one of the stars.
Smiling bitterly, looking away and trying not to feel my aching heart. The girl I love for the first time, died. I wasn't even able to save her, unaware of the fact that she's already suffering. She's a friend that I am so grateful of. She's everything I need.
The one who can make a smile on my face.
That girl who will always cheer me up when I am so down. Everything just shattered as she joined the blinding lights.
"Yah. Mom's already worried about you." Inyeop hyung muttered, patting my shoulder as he stood there with concern. I slightly nodded.
They're always saying that they're worried, but they never showed it. Parents that are workaholic, a life that has no meaning- I'm a terrible mess. Everything seemed so happy before, but it changed as time passed by. That time I realized, that happiness is just a temporary bandage to cover a bleeding agony. It will continue into a cycle, a smile that hides tears. A tear that shows extreme happiness.
Why not hide the smile and keep the agony inside? It's better than faking a smile to show the people you are happy.
"I'll move next week."
"What are you thinking?!" Hyung suddenly screamed before grabbing me by the collar. I looked at him weakly, his eyes were glaring at me.
"Hyung, stop." Sunoo tried to move us away from each other but hyung's grip was too strong. I stood silent, not even bothered of how he reacted. I knew why he was furious and I understand.
"We only have the three of us here and you're leaving?! If this is all because of that girl, Wonwoo, you can just move on! You only live once and you're doing it like this? You should be ashame of yourself."
That got me, but I chose to leave and live for myself. I just needed space and time to think and restart. My father was against the idea and he started showing me what he can do after I left his authority.
Damn, I just want an escape. My life is too miserable for me, I need a change and that will only start if I can let go of the past. Yet I'm still here, asking myself how to do such things when all I did was to think about her all over again.
YOU ARE READING
The Rules ||TwiceTeen FF
FanfictionFour girls transferred to their new school; new environment and new faces. Everything went well, they thought. But not until the school bell rang, indicating for the classes to start. As they step on the corridors, they noticed something weird, unl...