I Quit Thinking

Prologue : LOUIE'S POV

LOUIE
I Quit Thinking

"It's positive. I'm the mother." Natalie's word made me stood across where I'm sitting on the table. She's in a meter away, and we are not the only person in the room. Dining room. Hell, the idea of opening and breaking the envelope in front of these rolls and roasted food is taking all our appetites down to the grave.

I turned on my feet and started to walk out of her massive door. This is what I'm saying. I should've not let her prove I was right all along.

She's my mother, and, what now? What am I supposed to do now? I knew she's that woman on the album, but how come she doesn't care she had me on her womb for nine months and I was that product? Who's going to tell her that "Yes, you had her. The condom broke that night and you carried her for nine months but gave her away." Who's going to stop me from singing the 12 days of Christmas everytime I look at her? Who's going to poke at her back and surprise her with the words of "Aloha! For today's Fun Fact: Louie Hana's Sperm Donor isn't one of your Ex's around that time and she was just conceived in a one wild night stand from somewhere you visited!"

I'm done. I'm aware.

"Louie!"

"Don't remind me, Kiana." I tell her before she crashed me with the newly found analysis again.

She slaps me in my shoulder and took the seat beside me outside the balcony. "Congratulations, you did the perfect straight-back-turning-around walk out scene back there. Smoothly."

"Ha—ha. It's scripted. I figured it all already."

"Ha-ha, I know damn right. But, I didn't expect her first born to be that angry." Kiana is so confused, her eyes travels at the farthest end of the infinite triangle.

"He is?"

"Yeah," She sigh. "He flipped off the platters across them, gave his mother a game change glare, and he told her she's infact a pure selfish woman."

"He did?"

"Louie, ask me again and I'll swang you back inside. I keep wondering too. He's just seventeen, and I saw those hatred in his eyes toward the woman. There's a flicker right there, there's a story." She whispers the last word.

Maybe there is, and it's not mine to know. "Let them fix their own problems, Kiana. Stop blubbering about it. It'll enter your sleep."

"Trust me I'll let you know."

I gave her a nod and mouth a strong F word to her.

"But. Uh, here's a 'but' though. Natalie's daughters, Skye and Jamie wouldn't stop talking about having you. Their cheeks, oh gosh their cheeks are the reason why I stopped my self from admiring the sushis. They're both becoming tomatoes in my head."

"Here we go again with the to-mah-to problem." A glare was casts out infront of me. Kiana is my only friend and she goes everywhere whenever I need her by my side. And finding out the truth about my now birth mother are one of them.

"See it yourself.." She crinkles her nose. "I'll puke if I stayed."

"Sure you do." Plopping my head on the table, I still manage to give myself a space to relieve. "Thank you, for traveling a hundred kilometers with me." I faced her, arms fold to comfort my head against the stone table.

"I have no choice but to be here for you. It's not everytime we're seeing each other. I have to make sure you're going home sober to avoid the same mistake." She points out, crossing her legs under the table. "And besides, it's free."

"Touché."

"Tanga! You bribed me, Louie. If I jump, you'll take us to NYC. But no, you storms out and forgot the money in there!"

"Hey? You're the first one who did the same, see! I love you. But you're stupid."

Kiana rushes a palm to smack my bare leg. Red forms on the surface and I did the same to her face. Ops. I thought it's out of the reach.

"Bitch, you slapped me." She laughs, she's that happy to be slapped on the face by the one and only Louie Hana.

"Now why don't we go home and celebrate a fair play, shall we?" I stand on my feet and smiled at my friend. By saying I'm smiling straight at her, I'm doing it like Garfield.

"We're leaving? You haven't even given your mother a hug? For at least, right." Her words slaps me. Solid. Triple. Your mother.

"I don't need a hug from a mother. I quit thinking about that idea anymore. I'm good. I'll be fine."

"Louie." Kiana's arms automatically spread open for me the moment she stands. "It'll be okay. At least now we're sure who that bitch was, where she lives, and what life she has now."

Kiana is right. And, maybe I am not interested about my mother's life. I don't understand why, but I am not interested about her story and everything. Knowing the truth, slapping me left and right, back and forth, is enough. I did expect for more to be honest, more reactions from her, more efforts, more words. It's so stupid for me to imagine that her tears will occupy her face after breaking the results infront of us, or even after I stepped out.. I thought she'll going to follow me, run into me and give me some words of relief, or a single sorry. But none. Nothing. Maybe that's just it. Maybe she's not expecting all of this to happen in one clap. Maybe she's too eaten by her mistakes that she forgot about how will I take the news, too.

"It's positive. I'm the mother."

Yeah. You are the mother, it's positive that you made a mistake two decades and six years ago.