A Study of Poisons

TWENTY NINE

It only took a few hours for the entire manor to hear about what Natalia tried to do to me. I've had visits from nearly everyone but Alex. However, I was fine with that. My body was exhausted from dealing with all the Vampire drama.

Or I thought until a knock sparked at my door.

When I opened it, I saw the rage filled eyes of the Prince. My feet weak under my body as he looked down to me. Studying me. "Did she hurt you?" His voice raspy in the air as he controlled the room. I went back into my rooms as he stormed his way in with fury. "Did Natalia hurt you Delia?" He asked me again.

I jumped from my silence and gave him his answers. "No, I stopped her once I realized what she was trying to do." I told him, why was I so embarrassed about this. I put my hands to my face and felt the heat on my cheeks.

He sighed but yet he was still angry.

It was reminding me of when I pulled the curse from Sabien. When my ghost rose and witnessed his worry. My heart nearly bled from my chest.

"Do you think we are disgusting?" He asked me.

I wondered where this idea spring up. "Why would I? Because of one bad encounter?" I asked him. His eyes were glued down to me. As if he looked away the wind would take me from him. The desire to confess my feelings only grew deeper and deeper as I stood here. It was like if I didn't spill it now then the world would never hear me. "I don't think you're disgusting Alex." When I said his name, his tone drew silent. He was calming himself down.

Warming my heart, I caught him trying to grab for my hand. "I don't know what I would have done if she hurt you." He confessed to me. Only making my need to speak rise to my lips.

"Alex, I think I love you." The words followed without any warning. The Prince's eyes widened as he looked down at me. His face growing embarrassed as he looked away. Probably to never look at me again. He wouldn't meet my gaze. It was infuriating. I thought he would feel the same, I didn't understand him. I was so utterly done with all the confusion. "Do you feel anything? For me?" I asked him, my voice strong against him as he turned his head to me. He was unable to speak up for himself. I guess I got my answer.

My head fell low, wishing I kept my mouth shut. I didn't have the energy to deal with this.

"You don't think I want to want you? That I've been lying to you and myself? Cordelia I want you, I want to kiss you, and I want to hear your breath on my face." He confessed but it wasn't enough. He was too fragile, one second it was all about me and the next he made me feel like I was nothing to him. I kept stalling. His hand grabbed my wrist, his cold skin running down my arm. "Don't do that. Let me speak me peace." I stopped. I thought about everything from my first day here, to him helping me heal. The blood sharing. I needed to know why, I needed my answers.

I thought he might fall apart, "I was curious about you when you first came here, I didn't want you here but Holstein convinced me it was for the best. At first, I couldn't tolerate you. You were commanding and stubborn, which is a force I've never witnessed. Then I realized there was more to you. You weren't just a soldier, you were someone who has wanted nothing more than your freedom. That's what I grew to care about you for." His grip loosened around my skin, I wanted him to say the words. Those three little words I know that he's holding onto for dear life. However, I would not force him. So instead he said this, "If the world were different, I would say yes." He answered me, I don't know why I asked him in the first place. I knew what he was going to say.

Those were the words I was dreading this entire time. "If the world were any different, but the world isn't." My voice mumbled under its breath. I shook my head, because I knew that there was nothing I could do to change my fate.