New Flowers

Dandelions and Clover Flowers

In the aftermath of the Prentiss attack, Jon grows terrified of what's around him, and Martin provides dandelions, clover flowers, and comfort.
Content warnings:
-A panic attack
-Light gore/traumatic flashbacks

It was the 29th of July and daffodils were waiting for Jon in his office, along with plenty of paperwork and a statement to record from an André Ramao. Then Jon'd knocked over a bookcase and broken the plasterboard, and then someone had yelled to run, and Jon didn't know if it came from himself or not. And the worms had come through.

Hours and hours and hours and he didn't know what had happened and what was happening. What was happening?

It all just seemed like a blur.

Jon wasn't allowed in the office, but he still snuck in to investigate the tunnels where Gertrude's corpse had been found. There weren't any new flowers on his desk, but he was supposed to be absent, so that made sense. Somebody had knocked over the vase of daffodils in the commotion, leaving them trampled over, soaked, and covered in shards of glass. Jon found the body of a worm in the mess while cleaning up the daffodils, it was crushed. Several case files were missing, too.

The day that he came back into the office, new flowers were set on his desk in a new black vase. A big sunflower surrounded by blue flowers he wasn't familiar with. He decided to look up the name of the flower, but searching "blue flower with round petals" came up with millions of results, and none of them looked accurate. Eventually, Jon zoned out, scrolling through Image Search and lazily looking over hundreds of floral images.

There really was a flower for every color. And some of them looked very strange. One type looked like the red dangle from a chicken's head but as a petal. Another legitimately looked like a small organ but was actually an elaborate assortment of red petals in an unusual shape.

He saw an arrangement of flowers in a red vase. "Tan Roses and Lotus Seed Pods" is what the caption said under the image. Jon froze, unable to move his eyes away but terrified to keep looking.

The holes reminded him of Prentiss's skin, how it bulged but a tiny pore would open up and grow wider and wider. Until worms slipped out and left excess to slowly ooze out of her skin, a waterfall. How they would slide down her oily epidermis and emerge near the ground, moving faster than they should've.

How her red dress was streaked with substances from the worms, how they clung in her hair and her skin and her eyes. He remembered the crushed worm corpse, trampled over on his floor amidst the remnants of daffodils and broken glass.

He couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe, because what if the worms came back and ate their way into his skin and his lungs and he choked on them? What if that was happening right now, and he was in shock, and couldn't do anything?

He couldn't move, but he somehow found himself slamming his laptop screen down. Then he was crawling like a child in the dark, grasping the sides of his desk and making his way to the floor. He leaned against the drawers, but the handles to them dug into his back, so he awkwardly moved his hands and knees to sit against the wall on the floor.

The same floor where they'd emerged from the floorboards, flooding his office in moments. How they'd burrowed into his skin, and the only way to get them out was the corkscrew. The corkscrew that was in so many of his nightmares these days.

Jon furiously closed his eyes. Why couldn't he just breathe? He tried to slow his breaths but gave up in seconds when he remembered the blood seeping out of his skin as the worms were extracted using the corkscrew. How Sasha and Martin had to work together to get them out of his skin, holding him down and making him bite down on Martin's sweater so he wouldn't scream too loud.

Jon closed his eyes again, trying to force the memories out of his head. It was like an invasive thought, the more he wanted to think of something else, the more he could only focus on those thoughts.

"Hey Jon, I brought you some tea-- oh my goodness." Martin had opened the door and he was holding a mug, which he quickly spilled on the ground in the shock of seeing Jon hyperventilating on the floor.

He abandoned the tea to the desk, leaving the spill unnoticed. "Jon, I'm right here."

"God, Martin I can't breathe! I can't breathe, I can't stop thinking about it, and I saw these flowers and it looked like her skin," Jon rambled in a haze of panic and confusion. His breathing was erratic.

"Jon, are you okay with being touched right now? Is that alright? Just say yes or no," Martin said firmly. He was somehow calm, which Jon didn't understand, but it was helping.

He gasped in, then out, trying to get air back. "Yes, but Martin I can't breathe. I can't breathe."

Martin held out his hand slowly. "I'm going to take your hand, okay? He slowly held out his hand, entwining their fingers together, then brought Jon's hand to his chest. "Can you feel my breathing, Jon? Just nod." Jon did, so Martin continued. "Try to match your breathing to mine, okay Jon? I know you can do that. Just slow down."

Jon realized his hands were now in fists. "...I'm sorry. I'm trying." He did his best to count between breaths, even though they were shaky and shallow. He felt the steady rise of Martin's chest, and he could feel Martin's heartbeat with the back of his hand.

"You're doing well. Just focus on breathing."

Catharsis really was an amazing thing. Jon felt clearer in the head the next day than he had in a while. He made his way to his office but saw Martin in the hallway. Oh goodness, was Martin going to want to talk about his panic attack yesterday? Jon looked away from him, hoping the "if I can't see you, you can't see me" tactic would work, but Martin approached him anyway.

He had something in his hands. A few dandelions and clover flowers in a glass jar of water. Martin had probably picked them on his way to work.

"I, umm, I hope you're alright with these. Sorry, they're really not as nice as the other ones you usually get, but I didn't have much time this morning and I wanted to do something for you, you know? Sorry. Thank you. Sorry... would you like tea?" he stammered, blushing.

"They're nice, Martin... thanks. Sure, I'd like some tea," responded Jon, slightly fascinated by Martin's odd demeanor. Martin hurried off to make English Breakfast and Jon smiled at the dandelions and clover flowers in the jar.

They never discussed that panic attack again, but Martin's clovers and dandelions were a loving addition to Jon's office for several days.

To Martin, that was more than enough. He stirred a sugar cube into a mug and brought it to Jon's office, and smiled when he saw Jon asleep in his office chair. He imagined putting crowns of woven daisies into Jon's hair or bringing him a spontaneous bouquet or even Jon getting flowers for him, too.

He smiled as he set down Jon's tea, and as he left, a petal fell onto Jon's lashes, gently waking him.

This chapter is edited. Wow, the panic attack scene I wrote before was kinda trash. I'm glad it's fixed up now.
Thank you so much for every single comment and kudos and hit! I really appreciate each and every one of you. Thank you for reading, and have a wonderful day!
--Fanaticit