𝐸𝓅𝒽𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓇𝒶 ; ᴷⁱᵐᵉᵗˢᵘ ⁿᵒ ʸᵃⁱᵇᵃ ᴼⁿᵉˢʰᵒᵗˢ (discontinued until further notice)

・❥・ʜᴀʀᴍ * ˚ ✦

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AUTHORS NOTE

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❝When you write lost as an adjective and it autocorrects to uppercase because you write it as a proper noun way too often. Lost has also autocorrected to glitchy before -_- which is hilarious if you get it but weird if you don't {Angel probably gets it, but likely no one else will}

ah yes, more angst... At least this is more like hurt/comfort than just plain hurt.

just wanted to mention that at some point the perspective starts following Sanemi's thoughts and I'll mark it with two of these **, it still stays in third person though. Also the third person is kinda drifty in general so beware

hehe not me slipping some sanegiyuu into this cuz why not. ❞

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No, Giyuu hadn't meant for it to be that deep, but the problem lied more so in the fact that it would be much more difficult to conceal the injury. He had bandaged it up and everything, of course, he would be an actual idiot if he hadn't. But if his sleeve were to slip, or worse, the bandages come loose... Well, it was safe to say he hoped that wouldn't happen. He didn't even want to imagine what the other pillar's disgusted faces would look like as they gazed upon him, in his weakness. He didn't want to see the pity-filled expressions Oyakata-sama would make at him. He was disappointed in himself. He didn't want the pity, nor the concern of anyone.

But try as he might, he could not bring himself to pay attention to the meeting at hand. The selfish part of himself much preferred sneaking little glances at Sanemi. He would try to justify them to himself, to pass them off as completely innocent, but they were anything but. Sanemi had him in a trance, but he couldn't let himself get attached. No, attachment only brought sadness and death and pain. He would much rather suffer alone, as he was doing now. Loneliness was something he was used to, he had to be. He had been alone for so long.

He was far too lost in the abysses of his own thoughts to notice anything on the outside, far too detached to realize the blood that had escaped his bandages and was dripping down his forearm and then wrist. Too immersed in his mind to recognize the trickle of red from inside the cover of his sleeve, to on the ground by his feet. Nonetheless, someone else did notice this, with hidden horror. That someone just so happened to be the one and only Sanemi Shinazugawa, who was sitting next to him and was far more worried and concerned than anyone else could have expected.

**Sanemi had noticed Giyuu had a far away look in his eyes quite easily. He, much to his own disliking, would often find his eyes gazing at Giyuu's beautiful eyes, which made discerning whether or not he was paying attention much easier than it really should have been. Lately he had found himself getting more and more enraptured by the handsome water pillar, and Sanemi both loathed and loved Giyuu for it. Still, his eyes clung to every movement that Giyuu made with longing.

In love or not though, Sanemi was contemplating yelling at the ravenette to pay attention. He ultimately decided against it because that would mean interrupting Oyakata-sama and that was something he definitely did not want to do. He instead decided to try and snap Giyuu out of his thoughts with a pointed glare, no matter how hard it was to outwardly direct actual negativity to him. He desperately wanted to protect Giyuu, even if they were both definitely in the wrong business when it comes to living protected.

Of course, normally Sanemi would just pass Giyuu's spacing out (he did it fairly often) for just being his usual slightly air-headed self, but he noticed that Giyuu was fidgeting nervously. Like he was afraid something really bad was going to happen. Seriously though, why the hell was Giyuu nervous? Sanemi pondered. Giyuu's tendency to seem like somewhat of a cocky, arrogant bastard made it hard to imagine him being actually outwardly nervous. Honestly, the way he distanced himself from everybody was slightly off-putting, and it pissed Sanemi off that he couldn't even talk to the guy without seeming weird.

At first, Sanemi had thought that Giyuu had stayed far away, both physically and emotionally, from the other pillars because he thought himself better than them. He had originally thought that Giyuu must've just had some reason to dislike them all and that he found them distasteful or something. But he came to realize that Giyuu was just a closed off person in general, he didn't really talk much because he was probably shy.

But in the moment Giyuu looked as if he thought he had just committed the worst possible crime in the world or something, he look very much ashamed of himself. And most of all, he looked sad and resigned. Sanemi definitely did not like the look on Giyuu's face at the moment, he by far preferred the tiny smiles he would give when something amused him.

He was just about to turn his mind back to actually paying attention when he saw something out of the very corner of his eye. He noticed something that was very strange, it seemed out of place, and absolutely horrifying. Far to the sides of his peripheral vision he saw a small trickle of what was certain to be blood, the worst part though, was that it was dripping out from the cover of Giyuu's sleeve. The more concerning part was that the slow flow of blood did not seem to be stopping, and Sanemi was completely frozen in his seat. He wanted to snatch up the wrist of the man sitting next to him and examine what had to be an injury, but he couldn't move an inch.

Why hadn't Giyuu gotten medical attention if he was injured? Unless... it couldn't be, well could it? He certainly hoped he was wrong in every way possible, it hurt him to even think about the possibility that Giyuu could be harming himself purposely. But as he examined exactly where the blood must have been coming from, he determined that that was really the only possibility that could work, it's not like he accidentally cut himself on a door hinge or something.

(A/N: door hinges are dangerous, i speak from personal experience. Im serious, it's probably the stupidest way i've gotten an injury)

Sanemi pushed all his reservations aside, grabbed Giyuu by the collar, and quite literally dragged the man away on the short walk to his (Sanemi's) estate. By now Giyuu had most definitely noticed the fact that currently he had a small trail of blood going down the lower part of his arm. He had shrunken into himself and was trying to hide his wrist in his sleeve more than it already was, but Sanemi had already seen and was dragging him to a room inside his estate.

"Sit." Sanemi ordered Giyuu as he turned to some cabinets that had medical supplies, albeit less than he should have had. He rummaged for a little then pulled out some bandages and some rubbing alcohol. He walked over to where Giyuu was sitting and he looked at him seriously.
"You gonna tell me what happened? Or am I just supposed to make my own assumptions as to why you were dripping blood out your sleeve everywhere."

Giyuu was silent.

Sanemi opted for reaching out to push Giyuu's sleeve back to reveal that there was a bandage, but soaked through and hastily wrapped. Giyuu flinched at the action, but did nothing. Slowly but surely, and far more gentle than Giyuu had thought Sanemi could be, Sanemi unwrapped the bandages from Giyuu's wrist to reveal six horizontal cuts that had to be self-inflicted.

"Dumbass, you can't just go hurting yourself like that." Sanemi chided.

He soaked a cotton ball with the alcohol and started to lightly dab at the wounds. He the grabbed the fresh bandages he had grabbed and wrapped them softly around the cuts.

Giyuu hated it, he hated the way Sanemi's eyes drifted over him in pity. He loathed the tenderness that felt as if Sanemi was trying to tread carefully over glass. He hated how his heart fluttered at the touch of Sanemi's hands.

Everything was just too much for Giyuu, and he promptly passed out and fell backwards.

Sanemi watched in worry as Giyuu collapsed towards the floor. He managed to catch him before he reached the ground though. He had grabbed him and pulled his head into his lap gently. And he just sat there, holding Giyuu's unconscious form in his arms.

(Let me know if I should continue this one shot and make it a two shot or something. I'm gonna try for weekly updates. Part two of Giyuu's Farewell is in progress.)