Welcome to Gotham

She Smells Like Happiness Looks

Deadpool woke up wrenching himself out of the wiring. "Batman is a fucking PRICK."
'No Shit. Sooner we get the hell out of here the better.'
'So I guess we will never be friends with the guy huh?'
'Probably not. I mean he tied us up.'
'Then that means he loves us!'
Deadpool looked around the slums of Gotham and seen the bright lighting around ICEBERG lounge.

'TAAADAAA LOOK WHAT I FOUND.'
'You didn't find that.'
'But I could have.'
Deadpool rolled his eyes and walked toward the lounge. He walked past the goons and walked into a cold burlesque club. 'Somebody likes the ladies.'
'Are there ladies here?! Will we possibly get to touch boobs!?'
"Can that happen? Can we make that Happen?! Let's make that happen." Deadpool said walking to the balcony looking down on the stage. He seen a fatter man than earlier with a plate full of raw fish just hanging on his table.

'Dude Fucking gross! Who eats raw fish?'
'Maybe he is a classy sushi broad.'
'Really? Snarky is my thing'
'No ideocracy is your thing.'
'Dick.'
Deadpool looked over the fish heads to see what was going on on the stage where he heard talking.

"Mistah J isn't going to let you get away with hurting his girl."
"Ah I doubt he even misses you. You are not his favorite person after all."
"I am you fat sack of blubber and when I get out of here I am gonna whoop your ass from here to wherever penguins come from and leave you! I swear it!"
'She sounds hot.'
Deadpool shrugged and jumped swiftly down behind him and looked at the foxy little lady tied to the stripper pole. She was slender and had a painted face that had tearstains in her artwork. Her black and red costume clung to her shapely body. She was beautiful in a sad, lost, puppy kinda deal. She wriggled and twisted against the pole. He felt awful for her which is saying something, because he hadn't really liked women that much. He walked right up to her. "Hello."
"Hi.." "I'm going to save you now."
"JUST WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU-"
"Hey! Jerk you be quiet, I am going to help the... What's your name anyway?"
"Oswald Coppapat!"
"Well Oswald I'm going to kill you and now I have a real reason. Tying up some pretty lady for nothing!" He cut her loose. "Are you okay?"
"I been Better. Thanks for askin'"
'Do the whole knight thing!'
"Why are you here with Fatso here. Hey fatso why is she here with you?"
"Her boyfriend stole my territory, and my drop off zones. So I stole her. That clowns gonna learn his manners."
"Stop callin' Mistah J a clown! He's a king the king of clowning and jokes and that little birdy better quit callin' my man names!"
Deadpool turned around "Why are you name callin' her and her friends names?"
"Be-"
"You know what I don't care." He held a gun to him "I'm gonna kill you and make money." He turned to her "I like money."
She giggled.

'Did you hear that?!'
'She laughed.'
'She likes us!'
'She just laughed. Judging by her get up she must do that often. Not to mention she has a boyfriend who seems to be the talk of the town'
'I don't care that she has a super popular boyfriend who batman rather hang out with what does that mater... And...WHEN has loyalty been that big of a deal.'
"I dare you... You.. you weirdo to kill me. AFTER that is you fight my goons. And they are mean! "
"Yay! I love a fight!"
"Me too." Harley jumped up.
"Ohhoho no! Your clown king will murder me. Not that I care... But you if you get hurt. I think I'd care."
"Really?"
One swing knocked Deadpool down. He turned around . "You mean mean little man!" He punched the guy then swung over him and knocked out the other guy. Swung his sword and hit the other one. He looked around two were out like a light and the other four were running toward him with anger and gusto. He threw one into the other and threw his foot in one guys face. He fell back off the stage. "Hey Pretty lady how much is that!"
"Uhhh 4!"
"Thank you beautiful."
She giggled again.
'SHE GIGGLED AGAIN!'
'She maybe just likes to laugh.'
'ORRRR Maybe she likes us!' '
Deadpool looked at the pile of bodies he racked up and laughed "Well I guess someone didn't have their Wheaties." The woman stood there and looked at him "You missed one."
"I missed... Oh yeah! Fat sushi man! Come on time to die just like you said."
Just as Deadpool pulled his gun a batarang threw it out of his hand. "Hey that was my favorite gun!"
"I thought I tied you up."
"And I thought you had an explosion to investigate."
"What are you doing here?!" Batman grunted again. "I am going to kill PENGUIN!"
"There will be no killing tonight. Or ever for that matter. Get out of Gotham."
"I think I would be doing a wonderful service. He tied up a lovely young woman! I mean look at her see is as innocent as a baby deer drinking water."
"She is not innocent."
"Neither is Penguin B-man. You just can't see that."
"You stay out of this Quinn."
"How do you know the Penguin wouldn't be killing me if this handsome fella didn't save my life?"
"I don't. And right now I don't care."
"You should. I mean we can work together I have a tendency to be a good guy."
Batman snorted "I find that hard to believe." He turned to Penguin "Why is Quinn here?"
"Because Her boyfriend stole from him. What a jerk right? No offence toots."
"None taken jerk!"

'And things were going so well.'
'At least she didn't punch us.'
'She's so cute when she's mad.'
'We don't know her enough to say that.'
'I do. In my mind we have been married for a whole year. And it's going rather well thank you very much dick.'
'ugh... I don't care anymore.'
"So what did Joker steal this time Penguin."
"The serum I had Mr. Freeze working on for me. Not that it's any of your damn business."
"Just gonna let him stand here and talk to you like that?"
"No. What? Who are you?!"
"I'm Deadpool. How are you beautiful Quinn is it?"
"Harley." She said twirling her pigtails. The she looked at the Bat "Can I go now."
"I'm watching you Quinn." "Yeah Yeah I know!"
"Then you'll stay out of trouble."
"You haven't stopped me yet have ya B-man?!" With that she gave the Penguin a nice swift kick to the jaw and watched him fall.
"Isn't she lovely?" Deadpool asked practically drooling over her. "Yeah wonderful now will you go. I don't have time for you and the Penguins maddens."
"Fine. I'll go. If he gives me a cool mil."
"A million dollars." He spat "Why would I do that?"
"Because that's what your life is worth. And coming here wasn't fucking easy. And you made me fight goons because you're too chicken. A million dollars or he dies bat and that's just the way it's going to have to fucking go. I don't do deals often, but when I do it's because I like you."
"I think you had better go."'
"Not without his life or my money. At this point I'm fine with either."
"No." Batman growled. "GO. NOW."
"I'm getting really fucking tired of your demands." He lifted his fist and threw the first punch then teleported to quickly hang penguin above them. "So we fight for it, I guarantee I kick your ass."
"You don't wanna do this."
"I've fought the hulk who you are means nothing batman."
'We're going to fight with Batman.'
'If he doesn't... Oh never mind,'
"The who?" "The hulk... You know big green guy REALLY angry. You wouldn't like him."
"I don't like a lot of people."
"I'm glad you like me! We are going to be such good friends after this ass kicking!"
Batman grew tired of talking and swung at him hitting bone then kicking him in the ribs. Deadpool tired to maneuver but couldn't. He lost his footing and had to teleport behind him throwing another punch and then ramming him into the pole. He wanted to pumble him for the disrespect. He gave him a right, then a left, then another right and another left. All while singing ding dong the bat is dead. He threw Batman who averted it to his own advantage and toppled Deadpool throwing heavier Trying to keep him down, which wasn't happening. He was getting tired and the Penguins life hung in the balance. "Leave Gotham and I won't throw you into prison."
Deadpool tossed Batman and got on top of him "Not until I hear her sweet laugh again."
"What?"
"Can you hook me up with that hot clown chick?"
Batman tossed Deadpool off. Then he thought about what he said. He couldn't be serious. Harley wasn't that attractive to throw a hit man off would she? "Are you asking me to set you up with Quinn are you retarded?! I thought you said you were a hero."
"So I have a thing for the ladies. The bad ladies anyway."
"Fine if you and Joker want to kill yourselves far be it from me to stop you. But make anymore trouble in Gotham. Threaten to kill anyone else and I will find you and the fight won't be a sparing match. I'll kill you. "
"If you find a way. Let me know."
"What?" "If you find a way to kill me let me know. Shit I'll give you a head start. Here is my blood." He took a needle from his belt and stuck it in his arm pulling it out slowly filling it full of somewhat crimson blood. He did this five times. "If you find a way to kill me let me know. Perhaps you'll be a hero."
"You can't be serious." Batman looked at the viles "Why would you-"
"I cant die, and because of that I am who I am, so you're not the only one who wants me to die. Help me die. REALLY die and I'll never come back to Gotham if the effects wear off which they shouldn't because I'll be dead."
"I can't do this."
"I'll keep an eye on your city Bats."
"You were just here to kill a meme-"
"Why ya gotta bring up old shit? Call me Deadbat! I'm on your case."
"I'll Try Deadpool there is nothing I can promise."
"If you even make it slightly happen it's better than the natural."
"If you screw up Gotham-"
"I can't screw up anything in this town, and you aren't exactly doing a bang up job." He walked out of the Iceberg lounge. Ready to find Harley so he can hear her laugh once more.
'God She smelt like gunpowder and apples!'
'She was indeed beautiful.'
'She's gonna be mine... Ours whatever the hell it means. I'm gonna get her.'
'And her Crazy clown boyfriend.'
'He may be crazy but we're crazier right?'
'I'm not sure I can answer this.'
"Right We're crazier enough to get her. "He said continuing to hunt for his Harley.