a renegade; W2S

18

"What the fuck was that?" I whisper to Colby, my voice shaking. The crash was so loud, it made pieces of paint flake off the wall.

My entire body is pulsing with adrenaline and fear. As I look over to Colby, his eyes are wide. He puts his finger to his lip.

Expecting to hear footsteps, we stop walking. But instead, all I hear is flapping of wings and my anxiety is eased. Birds really can fucking scare you in places like this.

"It was birds," Colby laughs and then makes a kind of bird noise. I just stand there, still slightly in shock.

We explore the entire hotel, even room 39 which is labelled with some horrifying graffiti. My favourite bit is the roof. The views are to die for.

"We should probably get going."

-

Finally, after what seemed like a much longer trek, we arrive back at the party. It must be past midnight now. As I walk through the door, I can tell the party is almost over.

"Can you see any of your friends?" Colby asks me and I shake my head as I look into the garden and all around the kitchen. There's only about 5 people left.

"I should probably get going then," I say and I give Colby a kiss on the cheek for a great night.

I call an Über and in the ride back to our 'holiday' house, I am so glad that I spent my time doing something interesting, not partying to just appear to amicable to a crowd of people that only care superficially. It's all superficial.

I get out of the Über and walk into the house.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN THEY LITERALLY ALL TOLD ME THAT YOU KISSED HIM?" I hear someone shout I recognise as Chip as I walk in.

"I promise to you I didn't," Gee says and she's crying heavily. Everyone else is just kind of sat around watching.

"You fucking cheated on me at a party," Chip says through gritted teeth. And I'm taken aback, what the fuck is going on?

"Who told you this?" Gee asks.

"No offense, Gee. I did talk to a few of the boys there and one of them said that he made out with you," Talia says, begrudgingly.

"But I fucking didn't make out with any of them! I was with Freya all night!" Gee says pointing at Freya. Freya eyes widen like she didn't want to get involved but now she realises she has to back Gee.

"I was with her literally all of the night apart from when she went to the toilet once," Freya says.

"So, you kissed him in the toilet then? Did you fuck him too?" Chip says angrily. I look at Talia confused as fuck and she just shrugs her shoulders at me.

"What the fuck Josh? I wouldn't fucking do that. You know that," Gee shouts at Josh, trying not to cry even more.

I make my way over to the bar where Talia and Simon are stood. And that's where I remember something as I slightly zone out from their shouting.

"Gee, Josh," I shout at them and they turn to look at me incredibly pissed off. I don't take it personally."I was the one that made out with that guy. I told him my name was Gee."

"Why the fuck did you do that?" Gee yells at me. To be fair, it did take me a long while to remember that happening.

"I don't know, I didn't know it would cause this though. Sorry I didn't say earlier," I say to them and run over to hug Gee. She rolls her eyes and hugs back.

"You are not completely forgiven. Cunt," Gee says and I laugh. The mood in the room lifts heavily. Almost everyone is in here now, but I don't really care about everybody. Only that blue eyed boy standing awkwardly by the sofa.

"Everyone should go to sleep now, shows over," Chip says and everyone seems to agree as they walk out of the living room. As Harry starts to walk, I catch up to him.

"How was the night without me?" I ask him, with my flirting voice.

"It was good with the boys," he says and I'm disappointed by that. I wanted him to tell me he had been meaning to tell me how much he wants me, how much he wants to get to know every part of me. "How was yours?"

"Yeah, that make out wasn't great but I went to this abandoned place. That was fucking fun," I say, feeling myself back there. It was fucking fun.

"Oh, right. Yeah you made out with that guy. Why did you do that?" Harry asks me, seeming like he now actually cares that I wasn't at our holiday house.

"Why do you care, Harry?" His name slips off my tongue like a Tiffany ring would slip onto my finger if he were to get on his knees right now. I love the way his voice sounds, I just want to hear it and hear only it. No background buzz, just the way his words pour out.

"I don't, it sounded like fun," he says, not really believing it. His words seem to sink a little and it makes me both sad and happy.

"I'll make it up to you," I tell him and his ocean eyes perk up.

"Will you?" He says back.

I lean in so close that our eyes are right in front of each other. His eyes are searching mine like a lighthouse. And I want to crash my lips right into his lips. I could swim in his eyes and drown there, and I'd die in such peace. But I push down the feeling coursing through me, just to make this high I get last a little longer.

"One day," I say leaning back and stroking his hand as I walk away. I know I'm leaving him there standing, wondering what the fuck just happened. And I love that.