Silently Dying

I'm Fading

I'm fading.

I don't want to but I can't help it. My darkness is overcoming any semblance of light that I can find within these endless walls of heartache and desperation. Depression takes a hold, not letting the road to be taken be clear of traumas in the way as I struggle on. Where is the semblance of reality where I'm adrift in serotonin apathy? Monsters in the closet open the door and reach out for me while the nightmares under the bed pull my covers and won't let me sleep.

I'm tired and my mind is running circles as I fall apart but can't weep.

I don't have words anymore for all this random shit that shouldn't even be an obstacle, is now a sinkhole. And I'm so far into the crater no one can hear me. They see me but it's too much work to find something to pull me out. I try climbing the wall and it caves in, rocks / boulders and dirt colliding with my head. Because who the fuck knew the ground beneath me would give way. Every day is me trying to climb out of an unforeseen series of unfortunate events, my body weakening every second, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. To the point that my body is gripping the side, paralyzed and exhausted from all this effort and getting no where. Pain sets in and my body fades, my emotions wave through accepting the upcoming deadly fall leaving people behind, who I hope won't be mad if I don't make it out. I never asked for this.