Once Upon A Happy Beginning

Chapter Twenty-One: I Don't Want To Wait

Emma

Is it an understatement to say that was rough? Wow. The pain in Belle's glistening eyes and in the faint tremble of her voice as she asked Gold about the portal. His stuttering panic; an unyielding desperation to stay honest with his wife whilst protecting the goodness she sees. It was awful. Killian and I left quickly - it wasn't our place to stay. Now I'm curled up in his arms on a blanket aboard the Jolly Roger and I couldn't be happier. 

"Hey... Killian..." I start nervously, feeling the press of his nose on my shoulder, edging my words forwards. "I... I'm sorry about, well, about what we found out."

"Shh, shh, shush. Listen to me, Swan. I love you. Nothing changes that, ever. Baby. No baby. I love you and I won't ever dream of saying goodbye to you, love. Never."

"Really?"

"Aye. And I mean what I said on that isle. Your word rules this; it's your body, love, if you don't even want to think about carrying a child, then I won't bloody touch you with a six foot stick unless you tell me too. You want to be with child tomorrow, next month, next year, I'm with you the entire way."

"First... that six foot stick thing... never. I want both hand and hook within 30 centimetres of my skin, basically at all times. Can you do that?"

"Aye." He moves me closer to him so that I'm sat now on his lap, hips against his torso. "That good?"

"Perfect. And... I think, I think that I don't want to wait anymore... That whole moment where I thought we were... It was perfect for me, Killian. I want to feel that again."

I sense my husband's beam into me. Then it happens. Numerous times. Raw, passionate, loving, kind, courteous attention to each other and our bodies. I love him. He loves me. For some reason, all logic flies out the window, maybe it's a bad idea to be like this in broad daylight. On the deck of the Jolly. So casually docked in the marina. Where anyone could see. Or hear. Or interrupt. Honestly, it barely feels like I'm doing this for a baby anymore; it feels like it's just for me. For us. 

Once we find the capability to breathe on our own, we've manage to work our way into the Captain's Quarters below deck. I lounge back onto the plume of deep red cushions and blankets and hug my legs tighter around his hips.

"That..." Hook tries to pant out.

"Was incredible." I finish in an equally tired voice. "We're professionals at this."

"Oh... I know." We laugh together, running our palms around the soft skin of our spouse. That was beautiful. 

Later on, back in the car home, we both say something at the same time. 

"I don't want to jinx it-"

"Do you think-"

"You first!"

"No, ladies first!"

"Fine then... I don't want to jinx it but should I take a..."

"I was about to suggest the same thing."

"I'm going to pull over at the pharmacy then."

"Good call, love." 

At home, it was quiet. Stood around for the longest three minutes of our entire life. I don't think I can deal with a negative after the false pregnancy in the Caribbean. 

Beep-beep. Beep-beep. Beep-beep. Beep-beep. Beep-beep.

Killian is the one to turn off the infernal noise. I swallow in some air I didn't know I was holding. I wait for the cold metal to lodge itself in my clutched palm, the flesh of his right hand surrounding my waist. "We're ready for this."

"I know. Hang on..."

"Yes, love."

"Close your eyes. I want to both look at the same time."

"Aye."

I flip one over. 

And the other. 

And the next. 

The next. 

The next. 

"Open."

Positive. 

Positive.

Positive. 

Positive.

Positive.