HAVEN

Chapter 19

I sat on the bathroom floor, staring ahead, my face soaked with tears and body so fragile, limbs numb and chest heaving rapidly.

It's been a couple of hours since the incident but my heart still ached. I want him dead. I hate him. The thought of him made my body shudder, tears started falling again and I sniffled, wiping my tears with the hem of my towel.

*flashback*

"I hate you! So fucking much" I yelled staring at my mom.

"Haven, what's got into you?!" My mom yelled back

"You!" I walked to her and pointed at her. "You. I hate you" I breathed and tears welled in her eyes making me smile mischievously.

"What's going on in her?" Liam walked in, face twisted in panic. I laughed a humorless laugh and walked up to him.

"What's up Li?" I mocked taking another sip of alcohol. He observed me, not muttering a word.

"Huh? What's going on?" I yelled pushing onto his chest. He stepped back but kept staring at me then his attention adverted to my bloody thighs.

"Haven"he mumbled softly and reached for the bottle.

"No!" I shouted. My mouth dry from crying so much.

"Haven hand me the bottle. You're going to hurt yourself"

"Oh go fuck yourself" I yelled and spat at him .His eyes widened in shock.
I smirked and left the room.

His steps followed and he soon grabbed my waist harshly, picking my body up.

"Leave me alone!" I yelled thrashing my body and attempting to kick him.

"Liam, you're hurting her!" Mom yelled, her crys filling the apartment.

"You asshole! I hate you! Let me go!" I weeped but he didn't budge and kept dragging my body to the unknown. He entered the bathroom soon after.

"Let me go!!!" I wailed and kicked him hard. He grunted but kept his tight grip on me. He suddenly let go of me and placed me under the shower, before giving me a chance to get out, he turned on the shower. I yelped loudly as freezing water hit my body.

"Sober up!" He yelled as I sobbed. I looked up but soon regretted as I saw he was also crying. He wiped his face and left the bathroom, sniffling.

*end of flashback*

I got up from the cold floor and walked hastily to the door, I unlocked it and slowly opened it, the door creaking in the process, the sound making me flench.
I walked to my wardrobe and grabbed whatever my hands reached to, getting dressed in a hurry . My heart was racing and I couldn't help but get startled by the slightest noises. I finished getting dressed and walked out of the bedroom cautiously, I grabbed my pills and poured myself a glass of water. I picked up two pills with my shaky hands and brought them to my mouth, I gulped the water after and rested my arms on the counter, head bowed. I got startled for the hundredth time today when my ringtone went off, I walked lazily to my phone and picked it up. Louis.

"Hi Lou" I whispered.

"Uha...yea..ok sure, I don't see why not" Louis said loudly.

"Louis??" I whined

"Sorry, one sec"

"I'm not in the mood. Bye" I hung up and threw my phone at the worn out sofa.

I stood in the hallway. Body frozen but head racing with memories. My phone rang again and I rolled my eyes. I walked to the kitchen, ignoring the annoying tune,
I felt weak. Getting something to eat would surely help, I thought as I reached for the loaf of bread. I grabbed a knife to cut myself a piece, the blade cut through the bread and I stared intently at the shiny, sharp surface. I haven't cut myself for about a year, I grabbed the knife and held it up, seemingly admiring it. I brought down to my wrests. One swift move and it would all be over. I thought as I dragged it on my skin, not applying any pressure. A rushed knock on the door jolted my body back to reality and I dropped the knife.

"Haven!" Louis walked into the kitchen and stared at me. Myself still staring at the knife.

"Ven!" Louis muttered, shaking my body softly. "Are you ok?"

"Uhm.. Yeah. How did you get
In?" I asked even though I'm fully aware that I didn't lock the door after my mom's exit.

"It was open" he smiled and caressed my cheek gently.

"Are you sure you're ok? I'm sorry about leaving you alone with Satan" he said and I let out a forced giggle not wanting to disappoint him. He nodded happily .

"I got you something" he suddenly beamed.

"Yay!" I mocked and he glared at me.

"Shush!" He waved me off and left the kitchen. I followed .

He suddenly came to halt and turned to look at me weirdly as I stared back in boredom.

"What?" I snapped but he didn't budge.

"Why are you even home?" He asked, his eyebrows farrowed.

"Where else would I be?" I shrugged and walked past him.

"I don't know. It's just your mom mentioned you guys where hanging out after lunch."
My heart skipped a beat.

"My stomach hurt. We rescheduled." I lied and took a seat by the counter, Running my hands through my yet damp hair.

"You're not ok." He said and walked towards me, grasping my chin for me to face him.
I looked at him, my face showing no emotions, his showing severe worry. He bent down, his face now on the same level as mine and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Please talk to me" he begged and I pursed my lips.

"Nothing to talk about" I said quietly. Let it go.

"Haven please"

"Louis stop" I said, standing up and pushing him away. "I'm fine, just let me be and mind your business for once in your damn life" I yelled and hurt flashed throughout his face.

"You don't mean that!" He replied and stepped closer. "Just talk to me for god's sake!"

"About what?"

"Anything!"

"Just leave! You're pissing me off!"

"I'm no leaving until you tell me what the hell happened! You were fine this morning" he grabbed my hand trying to stop me from moving and my body tensed. I raised my hand and slapped him as hard as I possibly could.
His eyes widened in shock and his hand let go of my own to hold his now red cheek, his mouth slightly parted as he stared at me in hurt.

"I'm so sorry" I rushed and tried to reach for him but he shrugged me off and headed for the front door.

"Louis wait! I'm sorry, please wait!" I yelled as he rushed down the old stairs of the apartment complex, me following him.

"Louis!!" I shrieked loudly and he turned to me, his face soaked in tears.

"Louis, I'm s_

"You should go inside. It's cold. I will call you later" he said sternly, his face flushed.

"Listen_

"It's fine" he mumbled quietly
And reached for his pocket, he took out a small silver bracelet.
"I got you this" he handed me the bracelet, I stared at it, tears rolling down my face.

"It's a friendship bracelet." He laughed a dry laugh "I know it's cliche but I was planning to wrap it with a bow and everything" he sniffled and wiped his face with the back of his hand.

I held the bracelet tight, my head bowed as hot tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry" I whispered.

He lifted my face with his hand and I looked up. Louis' face was red, his eyes swollen from tears and the familiar smile now gone.
He leaned in and kissed my forehead .

"I know." He mumbled and stroked my hair. "I have to go, I will see you tomorrow at practice." He continued sternly, I nodded and with that he left.

(A/n: I used my phone to write this chapter and update it so please excuse any wrong grammar or spelling.
I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Comment/vote and thanks for reading!!)