FORGET YOU LAUREN

CHAPTER 44

Track 30: This Love (3:53)

Camila POV
I SAT ON THE TOP DECK of the Eurodam at dawn, looking out at the port of Sitka, Alaska—the very city I'd lived in before my family moved to the suburbs of Salt Beach. Since our scheduled trip to Moscow was cancelled, the program was letting us stay here for two weeks, but I had yet to get off the ship.

My father had written me and told me that he (and Stella) received the notification about Alaska, and were staying at a bed and breakfast in town "desperately hoping to speak to me together," but I had yet to respond.

I'm never responding to that one...

I held up my mother's sealed letter and decided it was finally time to open it, since for the first time since she passed away, I officially had no one else I could talk to.

DEAR KARLA,

I'm writing your letter FIRST because I have the most to say to you and I don't want to leave out anything. (I know you're having a hard time with me being sick, but I promise that I've done everything in my power to make sure that you'll be fully taken care of emotionally when I'm gone.)

I'm including a much longer, ten-page letter behind this one, but for now, I want to tell you three main things.

First, you're beautiful, and despite how those stuck-up girls on your block used to treat you, I guarantee that most of it was out of jealousy. (I'm not just saying that to be saying that either)

Second, I've told your father not to mourn my passing for more than a year. I know him down to his marrow, and if he mourns for longer than that, he'll lose you. I've given him a list of women (women I know) should he choose to follow my words and date, and I'll be up high cheering him on.

Third, I want you to travel. A LOT. I want you to see every corner of the world as soon as you can. I know I've said the words, "Make sure you study abroad in college" countless times, but I really want you to do that. It'll help you discover some things about yourself, and it'll expand your perspective of the world.

And later in life—much later, if you're still single, do me one huge favor: If Lauren Jauregui (Yes, that Lauren Jauregui ) is still single, go out for coffee with her a few times.

You're going to roll your eyes, I'm sure, but I think the two of you would make the best of friends, or even a great couple one day. The moment you pushed her down those stairs (I've always known that she didn't "trip over her shoelaces" like you claimed) and the moment you two started sending those very first hate notes to each other, I knew there was something there.

I'm laughing right now because I've never seen two people so obsessed with what their "enemy" was doing. I never told you this, but during the summer, when you'd go off to art camps for a week or two at a time, Lauren would always come over and ask when you were coming back. She would (of course) talk me into making her hot chocolate since you weren't there, but she admitted that she had way more fun with her "number one enemy" than any of her friends.

Anyway, go out with her for coffee sometime when you're in college so I can look down and see if I was right.

Don't forget to read my longer letter behind this one with more specific advice about life, but feel free to keep this one in your wallet. ☺

I love you forever and I'll be with you always.

Love You,

Mom

I READ HER WORDS AND the longer letter behind them ten more times, wiping away tears with each read. I folded the letter and made a copy in the study room, then I tucked it into my jeans and headed down to Deck Three. I scanned my ID at the port and rented a bike—pedaling all the way to where my dad said he would be eating breakfast every morning.