Knife of Rebellion: Battles of Eyenwar, Book 1

Chapter 2- My Life Now

I woke up before the dawn. Today is my first day as a spirit bridge. Seeing a new spirit bridge named only happens twice in a lifetime, and the celebrations afterward are incredible. Between my designation and Mirabel's new life as crown princess the party raged on well past midnight.

Many of the soldiers were alternating between congratulating me and taking bets on whether I my powers are given to me by Spirit Queen Vystra or Spirit King Dishni. Of course, I was only around until the sun went down.

As soon as the sun was set, the Yuvana took me away from the party into her tent. Once we were inside, she turned to me and asked me the only one question.

"I know I already asked you this as part of the designation ceremony, but I need to know. Are you sure that you wish to take the course laid out for you by the spirits?" Her white veil was lifted, and her black eyes bore deeply into mine. A moment of doubt shook me, but this was my chance- is my chance to make something of myself, to remove myself from my cousins shadow. And perhaps also a desire I had not known I had until the opportunity was afforded to me. I want to learn about myself, why I can see the things I can. If anyone can teach me, it is the Yuvana.

So of course I answered yes, I was sure.

It was then that she removed her veil entirely and I could see the familiar tattoos on her cheeks and spiraling down the sides of her neck and across her collarbone.

"I must show you something before we begin." She said.

"Begin what?" I asked. She did not answer me. Instead, she unfastened her blouse, deliberately without turning away from me.

"What are you doing?" I felt my cheeks go warm, but could not turn away.

The Yuvana raised an eyebrow at me, "You have seen a woman's body before, have you not?"

"W-well yes... Of-of course." I stammered. Her blouse and breast band dropped to the floor, and I forgot my discomfort.

All I could see was the same triangular shape that had appeared above her head at my designation. The symbol was inked onto her stomach, her navel right in it's center. Stags stood on their hind legs on either side of the symbol, their antlers circling underneath her breasts and intertwining with the thorned vines that travel across her breastbone. A crown sits on the hollow of her throat, and two pedestals run up the side of her neck, with two suns floating over the top, resting on either cheek.

"What are those?" I breathed.

"Every spirit bridge is marked with this symbol." Here she points to the triangle at her navel. "It is called the hexamiskden, six being the holy number of the major spirits and the most stable of bonds. It is meant to remind us of our duty and our promise." The Yuvana looks down at herself, the look on her face impossible to read.

"And the rest of them?" I ask quietly.

"Every spirit bridge receives dreams and visions from their patron spirit. If it is important, we mark ourselves with the most prominent feature to be sure we never forget it."

I clenched my jaw nervously, "And I will be getting my mark now."

She only smiled, "I will give you a moment to decide where you want it."

I decided on my back, the very center. The Yuvana says this is a good choice because it is a point of energy, but it will also be very painful. The whole time, while the needle placed the ink under my skin, the Yuvana talked to me in a soothing voice. She told me all about how to be a spirit bridge. How after five years of training, if I proved myself worthy, I would replace her as my caravan's connection to the spirit world, and my name would become my title. She told me about what life was like for her after she was designated, and that people would treat me differently now. How a spirit bridge could not be ruled by emotion, because the more I trained to use the powers gifted to me by the spirits, the more damage I would be able to do to the fabric of life if I lost control. She told me I could only ever marry someone I loved, because anything but the purest of love would taint my connection to the spirits, especially Zatyavi the spirit of love. She told me of how I would learn to communicate with other spirit bridges over large distances, and how I would learn to sense things before they happened. Those who are truly blessed by the spirits can manipulate the threads of life to cure otherwise incurable injuries. By the time she got to telling me about how threads of power connect every living thing, through time and space, my tattoo was done, and she had covered it in a salve to protect the skin and sooth the pain.

I went back to my tent last night and slept on my stomach, fitfully, for only a few hours. Now I am applying more salve to my tattoo, with the help of Mada. I have gathered many of my things, as I will be expected to move into a tent outside of the Yuvana's wagon. Last night she explained my daily regimen, first I shall exercise for one hour every morning in order to keep my physical training in balance with my mental and spiritual training. Next we shall study language, the ancient language as well as rudimentary knowledge of the native tongues of all the other countries on the continent. After that, I will learn every incantation, song and gesture required for every sort of religious ceremony my caravan will ever need me for. Then, after a break for lunch I will meditate, for hours if need be, to learn to control my emotions. Finally, if I have proven ready, the Yuvana will teach me how to control the power the spirits have gifted me with.

I am already overwhelmed and it is not even the first hour of my first day. At least the physical requirement is easy for me. I will simply go train with the warriors as I always do. I eat and dress in simple cotton trousers and a loose linen shirt.

When I arrive at the warriors practice field, the younger ones and I greet each other like always, but the older warriors look at me warily, and with an undeserved respect. Although I have not yet had the chance to change, they already see me as untouchable. I feel my heart constrict, knowing that our army works like any other; the new recruits will follow the example of their older counterparts. Soon even those barely a year older than I will see me as something to be respected from afar.

I go through my usual routine, first sword sparring, for which I have a knack, but am far from the best. Afterward, there is almost always someone who wants to challenge my title as the best knife thrower in the caravan, and once I beat one person, there is always someone else who thinks they have practiced enough to beat me. Some come close, but none have bested me since my twelfth birthday. I must admit, the physical exercise and the rush of winning does chase away my nerves and doubts for a time, but once I reach the Yuvana's wagon, frustration becomes my chief emotion.

I already had a firm grasp of the universal tongue thanks to my trader father, and the Ancient language was only an archaic version of the current Torranian. But the Skevetic she was trying to teach me was utterly beyond my grasp. She also had me prepare lunch, which was an utter disaster as I can't cook anything. These things are all I can think about now, as I meditate. Instead of settling my thoughts, it only clears a way to my deeper emotions. I find my frustration with myself and the resentment of my cousin at the forefront of my mind.

I remember when she first came to live in the caravan. She had lived with me and my family at first, seeing as we were her blood relations. Our caravan was honored to be fostering one of the princesses for the second generation in a row. My mother had given such enthusiastic reviews of the Vinícius Caravan that my aunt, Queen Prisa, was convinced to send one of her three triplets to us.

She had come holding the hand of her father, the queen's consort who was also the captain of her guard. She looked red eyed, as if she had been crying. I was determined to make her happy to live with us. Shasta, my younger brother had just been born, my older sister had been designated to the weaving trade the month before and I was in dire need of company. I tried to show her all my favourite spots in the forest. The best climbing tree, the spot in the river where you could jump from an overhanging tree into the water. Mirabel didn't seem very fond of the water, so I took her back to town while she complained about the bugs and the mud behind me. She complained so horribly that I finally snapped at her.

She's been using her eyes to shoot daggers at me ever since. She always seems to go out of her way to make me as miserable as she was that very first day. The Yuvana has snapped at me several times, trying to force me to concentrate. All it has achieved is to make us both silently frustrated. We have been simmering in her tent for nearly an hour now and I am further from inner peace than when I entered.

It is not until the explanation of the spirit world that I excel. The Yuvana begins by trying to teach me to see the threads of life.

"I already see them." I tell her. I am surprised by how easy it is to say. I have been hiding it for so long I thought I would be reluctant to speak it aloud. In fact it's quite the contrary, I find that I am grateful not to have to pretend anymore.

The Yuvana smiles at me, as if she suddenly had a deeper understanding of me. "We are going to have a very interesting five years together."