Fix Me: Bucky Barnes x OC (MCU)

Chapter 5

A/N: i hope someone understands the meme as well as i do

Warnings: I DON'T THINK THERE'S ANYTHING. I DIDN'T KNOW I COULD MANAGE THAT. I DON'T EVEN THINK THERE'S SWEARING.

Word Count: 1167

I'm tempted to storm over to Bucky's room and knock down the door, but I doubt he'll appreciate it. I stand outside his door, wrestling with myself, knowing that if he's like me, he'll need all the sleep he gets. My hands tighten around the folder, and I wonder what he'll think of me reading it. I doubt he'll like it. Why would he? Before I can turn around and scurry meekly back to my room, the door opens. I jump, and instinctively, my fist shoots forward. A hand closes tightly around my wrist before I cause any damage. Bucky stands in the doorway, with this sort of animal wariness that tells me he hasn't slept tonight. Glancing over his shoulder, my suspicions are confirmed as I spot his sheets, rumpled but not slept in.

He releases my wrist, and his eyes flick down to the folder, then back up to my face.

'I knew you'd go looking for answers but I didn't know it'd be at four thirty eight in the morning,' he chuckles.

I shrug.

'Some things aren't so easy to forget.'

It's meant to be joky, but both of us sober, and he steps aside like a real gentleman and lets me in. I glance around. All the flat surfaces are bare, but there are loads of pictures on the walls, and I frown slightly.

'I move around a lot when I have my nightmares,' he mutters. 'Wouldn't want to knock something over.'

I suppress this worrying urge to hug him, to comfort him somehow, and just walk over to his bed and perch on the edge. He sits down too and lies back, locking eyes with me. I realise that I just barged into his room like I own it. Hastily, I stand and make to go to the chair at his desk, but he stops me.

'It's fine,' he mutters. Something soft, almost tender, flits across his face before he averts his gaze, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallows.

'You already know most of it,' Bucky starts. 'They would always mind wipe you, because they sent you on more missions.' He pauses, and his fists clench. 'I think maybe because I was one of their first agents - ' he spits out the word like it's poison ' - I was a sort of test, and they hadn't finely tuned their mindwipe, I guess. Anyway, it makes me more volatile. More easy for me to snap randomly. Their tech had improved by the time you arrived.' He shrugs. 'We were usually put in a cell together. I helped you remember. We...' He trails off, and I notice his flesh hand is trembling. 'You... you were mine.'

Bucky turns away from me, his cheeks flushed. I reach out and grab his hand. He flinches slightly, but turns to me.

'Can I - can I stay in here?'

His gaze softens a little.

'Sure. I'll wake you up if you have a... Y'know.'

'Thanks, Buck. I - I will too.' I say, then frown a little. 'Everything about you is familiar but the name.'

'Uh,' he stammers. 'You used to call me James. Because my full name's James Buchanan Barnes.'

'James,' I mumble, testing the name out in my mouth. It fits him perfectly. I say it again, and his breath hitches slightly. He looks away again, and I smile a bit.

I Shift and jump down on the floor, neatly curling my tail around my nose and closing my eyes. It's hardly a minute before he speaks.

'Y - you don't have to sleep on the floor.'

I glance up, and if I could, I would grin. Instead, I leap up onto the bed and lick his face. He laughs a little, and the sound is soft, gentle, hardly audible, but it heck, it's like his face has opened up. I try again, to see if I can coax out more, knowing perfectly well I'm acting like a cub, but it's worth it because he chuckles again. And even that is a victory.

----------

I wake up to James stroking his hand through the fur down my back. Something close to a purr, but rougher, sounds in my throat, and I yawn and stretch.

'Morning, Minka,' he chuckles.

I lick his fingers in response.

'You going to Shift back and speak to me or are you just going to stay like that?'

I flick my ear at him, knowing that he can read my wolf's body language as well as he can read my human's. He sighs.

'I guess that's a no, then.'

I put my head in his lap and lick his flesh fingers. He pokes my nose gently, not enough to hurt, but enough for me to jump about a foot high and pounce on him. Wolves' noses are more sensitive than they look.

'Ok, ok,' he apologises. 'I just wanted to see if it still worked.'

Mock growling, I sit on his chest. His dark blue eyes sparkle as he laughs, and I wonder if this was what he was always like before HYDRA got to him, because damn it's glorious.

A sound outside the door makes me leap in front of him, hackles raised as someone knocks on the door.

'Come in,' James calls, and Nat opens the door and peeks around.

'See, no one's come to kill me,' he teases. I don't have to look around to slap him in the face with my tail.

'Oh, I came in to check if you weren't killing Bucky.'

I cock my head, and James laughs.

'And also to tell you breakfast is ready.'

Immediately I take off down the corridor, paws pattering lightly against the floor. Thor glances up from talking to Steve. He looks at me apologetically.

'I'm sorry about what I said yesterday.'

I Shift back.

'It's fine,' I tell him, but I know he's staring guiltily at the bruises around my neck. And if there's anything that'll make me uncomfortable, it's a god's pitying stares. I feel my cheeks flush a little and turn away, feeling a little indignant.

'Hey!' James yells. 'You don't Shift to talk to me but you Shift for an Asgardian who insulted you?'

I roll my eyes at him and go for the fridge.

'Buck, what's wrong with you?' Steve asks. 'You haven't been like this since... before.'

'There's nothing wrong with him,' Nat says. 'He's in lo - '

James cuts her off with a stream of Russian, and she fires some back. I ignore them and dig around for something to eat. Grabbing a half full pot of yoghurt, I go over to the sofa and sit, spooning the stuff into my mouth while learning some Russian, when Nat comes up behind me. Quickly, I hide my screen, not wanting her to know what I'm doing, and turn to her.

'Bruce wants to see you,' she tells me.

'Why?'

'He thinks he's got something that'll help with your nightmares.'