The Heart of the Matter (A Kam story)

Chapter Five: the head and the heart

Keefe's POV

For pretty much my entire life, I've hidden under a mask. I've covered up my raw, true self with jokes and snark. But underneath that, I'm a scared, broken boy. Sophie saw me in the tent at Exillium. The mask gone. But what she saw wasn't the whole thing. That was a veil of me lifting, revealing a small part of me. The real me. I can't show anyone who I truly am. No one would understand. No one would love me.
I moved away from Tam.
"I'm sorry...I just...I can't do this." I whispered, hating that I caused him to look so miserable. He stood up and bolted out of the room.
"Tam!" I called after him. He didn't look back. I stared after him, my hand outstretched, as if he might take it, and come to me...be with me-No! I like Foster! Do I though? Yes! I had too. I had been been completely in love with her sense we first met! Unless that was just my head...No. my dads stupid theory about feeling different emotions in the head and heart is ridiculous. I like Sophie. Always have and always will. There is no way I could like a gu- Nope! Not even gonna go there! I totally support the whole LGBTQ+ thing, but I'm not part of the community. I'd know if I liked guys. Ok, I went there. If my dad ever found out...if he even knew I was having these thoughts things could get ugly pretty fast.
"Are you going to go after him, or not?" Biana asked, jolting me out of my thoughts.
"He doesn't want me to go after him!" I insisted.
She raised her eyebrows. "Really? Why don't you go see. If he doesn't want you there, then you can leave. But I bet you he'll be happy."
"Tam? Happy? Those two words should not be used in the same sentence, unless there is a 'not' in there." I said to keep the subject away from going after Tam. Biana wasn't easily distracted. "Keefe, it your choice, but I think you should. Anyways, who's turn is it?"
I considered going after him, but decided that...maybe it's time to make another stupid decision. I stayed right where i was.

Tam's POV

I looked around.  where do I go? I need to get away from here. Now. Looking around, there were a lot of trees to hide in. I stopped. Maybe Keefe would come out...that's not what I wanted. Or at least that's what I told myself. I needed to leave. I held up my home crystal, letting in catch the last rays if the setting sun.

I opened the door as quietly as I possibly could, and tiptoed to my room. I head hushed voices coming from Tiergan's room, and couldn't help but peeking in. Tiergan was on the a Imparter. I listened as hard as I could.
"Tam left and probably came home. Can you check for me?"
Damn, Ling hailed Tiergan and told him I left. I tried to leave, but he must must've heard me, because he quickly said bye to Linh and turned towards me.
"Tam?" He asked. "Are you alright?"
I started to say 'yes' but my voice cracked and I just shook my head.
"Oh, I'm so sorry." Tiergan whispered, coming over and smashing me in a hug. Under any other circumstance I would've pushed him away, but I was hurting so much, that  just sobbed into his tunic. He stroked my hair and just held me. After he led me back to bed like I was a kid, he switched off the light, and closed my door.
"I know I'm not your real dad,Tam, but I love you. Okay?"
I nodded, even though I knew he couldn't see me. After the sound of his footsteps were gone, I was left alone with my thoughts. The shadows pulsed around me, sensing my unease. I thought of what Tiergan said. But would he still love me if he knew what I was? Would anyone?

Yes Tammy! We all love you!!! So I finally wrote a longer chapter. Yay me! If only all the chapters could be long...