Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Twelfth Letter

To: Vernon Chwe/Chwe Hansol
From: Y/N

Hello, Vernon.

It hasn't been that long. Actually, as I'm writing this letter, we had our first kiss a few days ago.

I guess I must have the worst timing when it comes to love or just falling in love in general. Maybe I took way too long getting to know you. Maybe I didn't believe in myself enough and I let the curse take effect again.

I told you about how I had the worst luck with love. During all of my time in graduate school, I haven't fallen in love again, but now, I guess I have fallen in love with you.

I don't know what it is that made me realize what I had for you was love, but from the moment we met, I felt a spark in my chest.

That day when I had my ears plugged with white headphones, looking down at my phone with music blasted high, you grabbed me by the arm and pulled me to your chest. You also had headphones on.

I guess that left a great first impression.

You saved me from a dashing motorbike that could have crashed into me and for the first time in years, I felt my heart race. With your hand holding my back, you asked me if I was okay, but I couldn't hear a thing.

Then, you removed my headphones and brought me back to reality when I was having a daze.

“Are you okay?” You asked as you let go of my body. “You should watch where you're going, always.”

I was almost too caught up in your handsome visuals to say anything. Your eyes were such a beautiful brown and your foreign-like visuals were mesmerizing. In the end, I just nodded and thanked you for saving me.

As you were walking down the street, about to plug in your headphone piece that fell, I was still able to feel my heart thumping. I brought my hand to my chest and I knew this undeniable feeling.

That's when I called out to you and told you that I'd repay you.

Liking you brought back the feeling of having a youthful crush. I felt like I could fall in love again. It felt like I was returning to my youth and I was able to recover all those broken love stories with yours. Of course, I knew I was just getting ahead of myself.

I didn't expect anything from us. Our career paths and majors were similar but also different. We didn't get to see each other often and when we did, it was usually always coincidental; at the coffee shop nearby, or library, or the burger place nearby campus... It was just like that for us.

We didn't start hanging out until I asked you out to the movies. Well, not really ‘asking you out’, I just asked to hang out as repayment, since you saved me from getting hit by a bike. I remembered that you liked to watch movies.

I guess that would be named our first date for me. It was fun, sad, and scary, thrilling, and fun, and I could tell that you enjoyed the movie a lot. It was awkward being at the movie theater with you at first, but the moment we sat down, you talked to me casually, making me feel comfortable when I was the one who should have made you.

You acted like yourself during the entire movie and seeing that side of you made my heart race. You laughed and clapped out loud. At times, you seemed to be an extrovert who was confident, and at times, you seemed to be a quiet introvert. Your personality baffled me in a good way but I know one thing for sure.

You give the best reactions.

Watching you laugh at the movie was enough to make me almost laugh as well. Before I knew it, I was enjoying it just as much as you did. I think the fact that I was with you left an impact on my happiness during that movie.