Nightmares

Episode 4.2

Nah-ah. Circus is not something that he fancies. All those people in costumes and make-ups terrify him. So better go fast from here. I grabbed his hand to move when I heard someone say from behind, "Excuse me? Is anyone here?" It's an old man wearing black sunglasses and a cane in his hand. I guess he's blind.

"Yes, may I help you?" I said touching his arm.

"Can you help me cross the road?" he asked.

I hesitated a bit. "Y-Yeah, sure,"

I turned to Joshua. "I'll be back in a minute, baby. Don't go anywhere," I said patting his cheek. He nodded.

I took the old man's hand and started walking across the road. It was a red light, the traffic was on halt. I felt a little insecure leaving Joshua alone there so I looked behind to see. My pupils got wider, a guy in a clown costume was approaching my boyfriend.

HE HATES CLOWNS. They creep him out. It'll scare him, I need to go back. Now. But this uncle! Gosh, can't he walk any faster? I was looking back and forth alternatively. The clown was trying to give him something, it's looking like a pamphlet. Joshua was shaking his head and stepping back from him. In the next minute, we crossed the road, the man climbed into a bus. I quickly turned to go back but the light changed to green and traffic started moving rapidly. Shit! Shit! Shit!

Why am I thinking it was all planned? The appearance of a circus out of nowhere, this blind man, then a clown. As if it was a strategy to separate me from him and get near my Joshua. And this loud rumbling thunder isn't helping either. The sky was pretty clear today! I take a breath, gulp, and try to cross the road merely avoiding getting hit by a car.

"No, I don't want to,"

"Come with me, I'm sure you'll enjoy our circus,"

"He's saying no. Are you deaf?" I snatch the pamphlet from that clown's hand and slam it on his face. "Let's go, baby," I said to Joshua and took his hand leaving that fool behind.

He didn't say a word all along the way. We reached home in time before the rain. "Are you okay?" I asked him, holding his hands. He nodded. "Did that clown do anything to you?"

"He wanted me to go inside," he said and hugged me. "It was scary,"

No, it shouldn't have happened. That jerk! I'm gonna give a good punch on his nose next time I see him. My baby's afraid now. So tonight's gonna get a little nightmarish for him. Then maybe hallucinations the next day.

Why? I hardly got him out of this cycle, giving him sleeping tablets against my will, staying with him all the time, and it took just a minute to get back on track again. I just left for one fucking minute!!

Should I keep him awake all night? Will it make things worse? Sleeping pills? No. Not today. I've been giving him for consecutively five days. It can cause side effects if I overdose.

"Let's watch a movie," I say. Though he's already looking so tired from all-day walking, I know he won't deny me. Just this night.

"Ok," he said.

I put on a suspense thriller movie, in the hope, it wouldn't lose his interest. I sat apart, my body warmth makes him sleepy. And kept talking to him throughout the movie.

After an hour or so, he came closer and snuggled up with me resting his head on my chest. "It's cold," he said. I brought a duvet sheet, laid it upon him, and wrapped him in my arms. Well, let's take this risk. He's cold what can I do? I won't ask if he wanna go to sleep, and he won't say that he does.

"He's framing her, right?" I said. He didn't reply. "Baby?" I looked at him. He was sound sleeping. I knew it, my warmness makes him sleep.

Now, what to do? Wake him up again? No, I won't do that. He's tired, he's cold. My eyes are also getting heavy, of course, I had to lift four shopping bags in each hand. I turned off the TV and lay down on the couch hugging him. I kissed his head.

Let's see what happens.

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