Fresh Start

S e v e n

   "How're things with Rayna?" I speak into the phone, rolling over in my bed, closing my eyes lightly as I beg sleep to come.

"Okay." Jenna answers, "We talked about things, and we-uh-we decided it'd be best to take a break."

My eyes open at her words, my expression changing to pity without even meaning to, "J..."

"I know Kristin, I know." She mumbles, her tone streaked with sadness. "It- just- fuck- she's moving back in with her parents for a while so my house'll be fucking lonley."

I roll over again, resting the phone against my pillow, "Come visit me." I offer, "We can be lonely and single together."

A small scoff reaches my ear, "As if I have enough money to fly to freaking Italy, I've got to pay my rent on my own now, I'll barely be scraping by."

"Shit I'm sorry, can't you get Rayna to still pay rent? I mean her name's on the listing right?" I question.

There's something similar to a scoff but more like an exacerbated sigh, "She's got enough going on, I don't wanna bother her."

"What about your parents? Could they help you pay rent?"

"Kris...c'mon we don't talk about my parents." She says quietly, making me nod slightly as I mutter a small agreement.

I don't know what happened between Jenna and her mom all I knew was her mom was in jail in San Francisco and they didn't talk anymore. I sympathize with her, god knows my mom's a shit show. Even though I don't like to talk about my mom, I still think Jenna should, maybe it'd help her to talk about it.

There's a small ding from her end of the line making me tune in again, "Gotta go Kris, Max's here we're gonna smoke and what horror movies and about anything else other than talk about my shitty relationship."

I smile sadly, "Have fun."

"You know I will." She mutters, no real joy behind her words, before she hangs up, the line dropping.

My door opens making a huge squeaking noise alerting me someone's entered my room, making me roll over to face Kaylee who wears a sheepish expression, "Yes?" I ask, giving her a blank look.

She purses her lips, "Are you still mad at me?" Kaylee half whispers, her eyes dropping from mine to the floor.

"You outed me." I emphasize, "Fuck Kaylee do you even get how that feels?"

"No." She says, her voice whiney as she enters further into the room, sitting at the end of the bed. "I don't get it, okay? I can't- I won't ever understand." She sums up, sitting cross legged as I push myself up my bed, leaning against the headboard of my bed. "But Kris you're already out, wasn't she gonna find out anyway?"

I sigh, kind of understanding what she's getting at, "On my terms Kaylee, I've never gotten to stabley come out to someone. I came out to you sobbing about my girlfriend, I came out to my parents, still crying about Luca, the whole fucking school found out on a video. Just once I'd like to come out to someone on my fucking terms."

"I'm sorry Kris, but I was drunk!" She exclaims, throwing her arms up in defeat, "I don't even remember what I said, she won't care."

"I know she won't." I agree, "Sorry Kaylee, I just- I don't know, I didn't like her reaction."

Her eyes squint a bit, probably in confusion, "You mean Maia? W-what'd she say?"

"'Oh.'" I quote, "That's it, 'Oh'."

"She was probably just surprised." Kaylee offers kindly, her eyes hopefully.

I shrug, "What cause nothing about me says I like girls?" I state sarcastically, making her smile slightly, "Yeah whatever that was probably it."

The quiet stretches between us, building the tension in the room before-thankfully- Kaylee Breaks it, "So you can't sleep? Kieron told me to watch Orange Is The New Black." She offers and I connect the two things together in my head sending her a thankful expression before we both are heading to the living room, huddling together with a fuzzy blanket over both of us and despite my resistance, Kaylee insists we share a bottle of tequila between us, and even is I was hesitant at first I'll admit it did make me feel better.