The best years

11

Lucy's Pov
I look at myself in the mirror. I've never been the skinniest, but not fat either, my mum always called me healthy. I've always been insecure but looking I'm the mirror at myself I feel like a new confidence has consumed me.

I'm wearing a flouncy light green dress that shows of my curves beautifully. My generous breasts are pressed against the thin fabric. Although I have always been insecure, the one thing I love about my body is my boobs. They never fail to make me feel confident.

The dress is complimented by a thin shawl like jacket that's heaped around my elbows. My hair is long and bouncy and my makeup is how I normally have it but with glitter on my eyes and a lot of high lighter on. Although my ankle is still messed up I managed to convince Sasha to let me wear heels, only small ones though and they are complimented by a super sexy ankle wrap, that I really didn't want to wear but it was one of the conditions with wearing heels.

I walk out into the hallway getting ready to go up and perform. My ankles click against the concrete floor and when I look up I see a tall blonde Australian looking my way.

He looks shocked and when I follow his eye-line I see him looking not at my eyes, however sitting fight on my cleavage. Although it's creepy when some people look at my boobs, when it's someone you like there is nothing sexier. I feel confidence boom through me as I walk over to him, putting a small bounce in my step to let breast slightly jiggle, putting on a show for the boy in front of me.

"Hi" I smile innocently as I get in a close range of him. My voice knocks him out of his daze and his eyes finally connect with mine. His blue irises connect with my green ones, and my smile ricochets onto his face.

"Hi" he smiles back still looking slightly dazed.

"You guys look great" I say gesturing to him and the band that was chatting in a small crowd behind Luke. Luke was wearing a loose black shirt with the front few buttons undone showing his broad chest. I probably let my eyes wonder over his chest for a little over a healthy amount of time

"Oh um thanks." He smiles "you look....Um."
He fumbles and anxiety floods through me thinking I look awful. I feel like an idiot strutting over here all confident when really I look like trash compared to them.

"Well, I guess I'll go change" I say I'm a sorry tone, the last thing I want to do is make the band look stupid when I'm opening for them.

As I start to walk away his hand connects with my wrist pulling me back to his chest.

"How can you think I think you look anything less than perfect" he whispers grumpily as he looks down at me. A blush floods my face making me feel like an idiot for doubting him.

A lock of his hair falls out of place and I reach up and place it back behind his ear. His eyes never leave mine, all I can think is how come no ones ever looked at me like this before.

"I asked you a question" he says knocking me out of my daze.

"Oh um" I fumble not really realising he wanted an answer.

"You're so fucking oblivious" he scoffs before walking away, looking frustrated. I would run after him but there is no hope with his long legs and my sore ankle.
My heart breaks just a little bit. I don't know what I did to make him mad. I feel like an idiot, I'm so fucking stupid.

My eyes start to water but before the rest of the band realises I'm pulled away being told I'm on in 2 minutes. I walk toward stage not really sure how to feel.

I stumble onto stage as the lights go down.

"Hi there Toronto" I say into the mic as the lights come on. Screams fill the arena and it makes me feel a little bit better.

"Tonight I'm gonna sing a couple songs for you, I hope that alright" The intro of the music starts.

"This first one, is about trying your hardest but feeling like no one wants be with you. Like no one would choose you first. This is called Tolerate it"

"I sit and watch you reading with your
Head low
I wake and watch you breathing with your
Eyes closed" I sing into the mic, as the music fills the arena.

"You're so much older and wiser and I" I sing and my eyes connect with Luke's blue ones in the crowd. He is sitting with other boys, his arms are crossed and he looks upset, but when my eyes connect with his he relaxes.

"I wait by the door like I'm just a kid
Use my best colors for your portrait
Lay the table with the fancy shit
And watch you tolerate it
If it's all in my head tell me now
Tell me I've got it wrong somehow
I know my love should be celebrated
But you tolerate it"

I finish the first chorus, singing the words I wrote when I was back in sydney, singing to a computer with my guitar in my hands, when boys didn't want to date me and I felt like I had no friends. If boys back home didn't want me, why would Luke?

"While you were out building other worlds, where was I?
Where's that man who'd throw blankets over my barbed wire?
I made you my temple, my mural, my sky
Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life
Drawing hearts in the byline
Always taking up too much space or time
You assume I'm fine"

I sing it like a fire has ignited within me, angry at how I've been mistreated, angry at how boys have hurt me. I don't want boys anymore, I want a man.

"Break free and leave us in ruins
Took this dagger in me and removed it
Gain the weight of you then lose it
Believe me, I could do it
If it's all in my head tell me now
Tell me I've got it wrong somehow
I know my love should be celebrated
But you tolerate it"

I finish the song with tears in my eyes and I look back into the crowd and Luke is nowhere to be seen.