H A U N T E D

f i f t y - f i v e

f i f t y - f i v e

It is later in the evening when Marcus and I cover ourselves with velvet sheets. Once we arrived at his quarters, Marcus had desperately gripped my jaw and did not let me go until past midnight. His fingers trace the hollow of my back, tickling my spine. I lay on my stomach, staring up at him as he stares at my naked skin, his eyes deep in thought. I reach up to touch  his bottom lip, but he pulls away, almost being stunned by my sincere touch. He never lets me kiss him, despite having seen my most intimate parts of myself.

I watch him stand up, his back muscles flexing as he bends down to grab his robes. I follow his lead, letting the covers pool to my waist and Marcus hands me my own robes.

He holds my hand as we walk out to his balcony, where we can observe the city lights and the stars above. This is how many of our evenings have gone these past few years, where we would do what makes us feel the most alive, and then look up at the stars to feel less guilty.

I remember the first time we had done this dance, a few months of sitting on top of the balcony and only talking with each other led up to one moment that we did not resent but always would regret. Aro was right when he said I would be the next queen. A few months ago, he learned of our arrangements and demanded a customary event to follow. Marcus and I did not decline the offer, as it seemed like the next obvious step. We still have not done this step however, somehow keeping our hands tied behind our backs and our lips dripping with excuses. Now, staring down the city that we own, I feel as though the future is unclear.

"You did not ask about tonight", Marcus speaks for the first time today. I breathe heavily through my nose, even though I do not need the oxygen, I prefer to be able to smell my surroundings and to familiarize myself with them. Right now, there is only one smell in the air.

"I wish not to speak about it. I am sure Aro will come here to demand an apology for what I did to Alec, though", I shrug at the approaching threat of punishment. Alec and Jane are his favorites, and no harm should come to them. They have the bodies of preteens, but their minds are ancient and wicked.

"Do you know why their eyes shine golden?"

I shake my head. It is a splendid sight to behold, and I was wondering the reason for it.

"It is because they do not feed off of humans, as we do. They drink the blood of animals, wanting to be such a fictional thing as 'good'."

I try to imagine a world where I would be forced to drink the blood of animals, and cringe. Humans are addictive and I wish not to lose the sweet taste of their blood.

Another memory resurfaces of the day.

"Why did Aro say Carlisle took his kin?"

Marcus looks at me for a moment, contemplative whether he can answer, before sighing. The sweet scent of lilies leave his mouth, and I close my eyes. It is addictive. Marcus said that I smell like forget-me-nots and roses, and I found him leaning into my neck more than once.

"Many years ago, Aro wanted to experiment whether or not humans would need immortals to bite them, to turn", he starts while rubbing his jaw.

"He had a magic man pour some of our venom into a mortal, and kept the mortal captive to see to what extent our kind would go, without feeding", he explains and I don't find it hard to connect the dots.

"Jack was the mortal?"

Marcus nods once, plucking a rose from the vines that grow around the pillars of the balcony. He places the rose in my hair, and I lean into his hand.

"Yes. Aro finally saved him when the world was at war, but Jack didn't wish to stay here. Carlisle visited about twenty years ago, and Jack was interested in his lifestyle. Aro thinks Carlisle stole his kin."