If you genuinely enjoy what I write, that hate crime is not my fault

🍳☁️Bitches Like Bad Boys☁️🍳

A/N: So uhhhh, originally this was gonna be a reference to the vine I linked above, but then it turned way more serious than I wanted it to be. But either way, enjoy?

Annie belongs to Eggi_the_author

Meta Knight, Sword Knight, Blade Knight, King Dedede, and Escargoon belong to Nintendo.

Princess Jewel Von Starstone belongs to yours truly.

~~~~~

Meta Knight was in Castle Dedede's rose garden looking out in the distance. His mind was set on the gorgeous and beloved Princess Jewel Von Starstone.

"Jewel is the most beautiful princess in the universe." Meta Knight said to himself, his eyes a deep shade of magenta and his cheeks a bit red under his mask. "I've never met someone so ~SPECIAL~ in my life..."

Sword Knight and Blade Knight were with him, and started to take notice.

"Sir, are you alright?" Sword asked.

"You haven't been yourself lately." Blade added.

"I haven't, have I?" Meta Knight sighed, his eyes turning green. "I think I'm in love with Jewel..."

"We know." Sword and Blade said in unison.

Meta Knight rolled his eyes. "Is it really that obvious?" His cape blew dramatically in the wind as he went back to monologuing about Jewel. "I want to be with her...I want to be able to protect her...and love her...and cherish her...But it seems like everyone does..."

"Well to be fair she is ~SPECIAL~ as you so eloquently put it." Sword said.

"We'd probably ask her out if we weren't already in a relationship with each other." Blade teased.

"Is that right?" Meta Knight deadpanned.

Meanwhile, King Dedede was pacing back and forth in the throne room. His mind was also set on the gorgeous and beloved Princess Jewel Von Starstone.

"Jewel's the most beautiful princess in the universe." He declared. "I never met someone so ~SPECIAL~ in my life entire life!" 

Meta Knight's eyes turned red when he heard that. He flew into the castle and decided to eavesdrop on him.

King Dedede turned to his lackey, Escargoon. "Escargoon! I think I'm in love with Jewel!"

"I know." Escargoon replied, deadpanning.

"Wait really?!" King Dedede asked, "How'd you know?!"

"Well to be fair she is ~SPECIAL~ as you so eloquently put it." Escargoon said sarcastically before mumbling "I'd probably ask her out if I didn't have a crush on—"

"What'd you say?" King Dedede turned to him.

"Nothing!" Escargoon answered, blushing. "Don't worry about it, sire. Just focus on trying to win the princess over."

"But how do I go about—"

"Bitches like bad boys." Annie said out of buttfuck nowhere, leaning against one of the stone pillars.

"Annie?!" King Dedede just now noticed her. "How do you know that?! You some kind of expert on girls cause of your lesbianism?!"

"I'm actually bisexual." Annie frowned. "But yes, I am an expert on women. I mean I have to be when I'm also a woman~" Her frown turned into a sly smile.

"Hmm...That might not be a bad idea!" King Dedede smiled. "I'll try it next time I see her!"

And speak of the ~SPECIAL~, Jewel walked in. "Ah! Hi guys!" She beamed at them all with a smile that could put Valentina's to shame. Yes. I watch Drag Race. I'm gay and so is this one shot. Well actually I'm pan, but moving on.

 "So, I had a question about—"

"Yo what up, bitch?!" King Dedede said, tryna be suave and shit.

Unfortunately all it did was bring tears to Jewel's gorgeous sapphire eyes.

Annie glared at King Dedede before pulling her into a warm embrace. "What a jerk!" Annie said before holding her close and leaving with her. She gave King Dedede a mischievous grin on the way out.

"Dagnabbit! That sly fox tricked me!" King Dedede growled.

Meta Knight's eyes turned pink, before teleporting out of the throne room and chuckling. He suddenly heard Jewel and Annie chatting nearby.

"Thanks for sticking up for me like that." Jewel said to her.

"Hey, no prob." Annie answered. "It's my job as a knight to protect you, isn't it?"

"I guess so." Jewel sighed, blushing a bit. "I'm going to go outside and play my flute for a bit. I'll see you around!"

Annie smiled and waved at Jewel before sensing Meta Knight was nearby. "I know you're there. Show yourself."

"Your fox senses have gotten better." Meta Knight commended, "Good for you."

"Thank you sir, I've been practicing" Annie grinned, her fangs showing.

"I can tell." Meta Knight said. "Especially with that little stunt you pulled on the king."

Annie giggled. "What can I say? After all I am a sly fox."

"Just don't go thinking you can win Jewel over with that alone." Meta Knight warned.

"Of course not." Annie said. "But with King Dedede out of the picture that's one less guy to worry about, is it not?"

"You're right," Meta Knight admitted. "But our job is to protect the princess from Nightmare and his monsters. So I don't need you making these types of advances on her." His voice sounded stern.

"Advances...?" Annie frowned. "It's true that I can be a little mischievous, but don't take my 'advances' on her as mere flirting." 

Annie put a paw to her heart. "I love her. Jewel is the most beautiful princess in the universe, both inside and out. I've never met someone so ~SPECIAL~ in my life...You understand, don't you? Her kindness...her optimism...her radiant smile...her determination to win this war...She's going to make a fine ruler one day...She lets people like us believe there's still hope out there. That's why I want to protect and cherish her."

Meta Knight's eyes turned blue. "I understand completely. Maybe you're not so bad after all..."

"What was that?" Annie frowned.

"Don't think I'll give up my love for her that easily, though." Meta Knight said.

"I didn't think you would," Annie responded understandingly. "But I'm glad we can agree on that." And with that, she left.

Meta Knight chuckled, his eyes turning pink again. "I think I'll go back outside and listen to Jewel playing the flute..."