Stefan's pov:
It's been 2 days since I had to quit my job, all because I have COPD, shit.. Should've never started smoking. Even though I miss It so much.. Whenever I feel sad all I want to do is take a hit of a cigarette.. I remember that it somehow used to make everything easier.. It's been sort of hard lately.. I was trying to find a job again, nate helped me, he's a good guy. I was going to start as a waiter in the nearby restaurant today. I hate that Elena and I didn't get to have the date I planned so dearly.. She wasn't mad though.. I have no idea why.. She should be mad. I literally promised her.. She just has too much goodness in her.. I love her so much.. I'm getting ready for work as my mind wanders around thinking about how much I would love to have a cigarette right now.. I can't though.. I shouldn't.. I go to work and when I reach there I see Matt there and curse internally.. Shit.. He works here too.. God- out of all the places I could've found work. This. I can't do anything about it. I'm not a kid anymore. I can't just leave my job because I hate this stupid jock. Ugh but I literally loath him so much. He has been nothing but rude to me all my life and it's not like I got in trouble with him purposely.. He just hated me for no reason. And that's pretty normal and I'm used to it but he made my life miserable. Made rumours about me, told the whole school I.. K- killed my mother.. Beat me, humiliate me . Tortured me in literally every way possible. He was actually the reason Elena stopped being friends with me.. He didn't personally trouble her, mostly because he wanted to get with her, but he did tell rumours about her to everyone and she got teased.. They made her turn against me and I totally understand.. I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who leads me to getting bullied, who would? But it's all over now. We're happy, aren't we.. I am happy, and I hope she is too. Because I see it in her eyes when she looks at me.. I don't see pity, disgust or resentment in there.. I only see love.. I'm so lucky to have her in my life.. There's no joy more than the joy I feel when I caress her face, kiss her lips, slide my hands on her waist as she hangs hers on my neck.. How she kisses me ear and whispers "I love you" when we are together.. She's the one person who I know I can trust with everything.. Matt smugly smiles at me and I return the smile trying to be polite.. We start working and realise this is so much easier for me than the coal mine work.. That stuff actually had me so slumped that my whole body ached everytime.. I look at the calendar hanging and it's only now I realise that tomorrow is my birthday.. Not something to be really excited about because I have never celebrated my birthday and I don't think I ever will because it's the same daughter my mother died.. Damon usually wished me and hugged me or gave me a candy with his savings, but other than that.. There's nothing special that has happened ever that day.. Throughout the day matt kept purposely bumping into me but I didn't say anything because I was just here to work and not ot waste my time on some stupid kid who wants to just pick up a fight with me and push me around to boost his ego.. I don't even know how people do that.. How can they be so mean to someone, try to make their life so much worse, and still not feel bad about it? How does a person inflict pain on another purposely and feel like they are doing absolutely nothing wrong.. It just doesn't make any sense.. I just want a normal life.. I remember as a kid I wanted to be this and that and all sorts of adventurous and daring stuff but now, all I want is normal stuff.. Happiness.. I shake the thoughts away and I go to the pantry to bring some stuff.. It's kinda cold in here.. As I go inside I hear someone bang the door close.. Shit.. "HELLO? WHO IS THIS?!? MATT!?! " " ugh loser you guesses it right. You got my girl didn't you? Now stay there for a while- " " WHAT THE HELL MATT OPEN UP- SHE WAS NEVER YOUR GIRL SHE'S HER OWN PERSON WHAT ARE-" " GOD DON'T START WITH THE SHE'S THIS SHE'S THAT" "MATT OPEN THE DAMN DOOR ITS FUCKING COLD IN HERE! " "So freeze to death" He said, laughing and I could here his footsteps as I kept shouting for help.. God I really hope someone would come and help me because not everyone's shift could be over by now could it. I forgot to wear my watch today.. I don't even know what the time is.. It's so cold I've started finding it hard to feel my hands and legs and I'm leaning against the cold door and sitting on the cold floor.. I feel my teeth chattering and my arms shaking.. I put them between my armpits to calm down the shaking.. It's so congested in here.. I'm starting to feel my breaths getting heavy.. Short.. I feel tired and I keep banging the door calling for help but then I just give up.. Okay.. This is it .. I'm Gonna die ... It's so cold.. I start coughing and a lot of mucus comes out.. Ugh.. I'm trying to calm down but I'm losing it.. My breaths turn into needy desperate gasps and I feel like everything is going to fall apart any moment now.. Then all of a sudden I start hearing footsteps.. I start banging the door hopefully, "i- I'm h-here p-please h-h-help me-" My teeth are chattering and I barely get this out, screaming, coughing, hoping that someone has heard me.. "P-please hel-help" I say one more time and just then the door opens and I fall down because I was leaning on the door.. A blonde man with greenish blue eyes picks me up and makes me sit, rubbing my hands because I'm cold.. He looks Damon's age.. He's calling for someone.. Elijah, the person who gave me the job. The blonde man doesn't look like a waiter or someone who works here, because he isn't wearing the clothes for it.. Maybe he's someone elijah knows.. They start helping me rubbing my arms and even my legs.. I can't stop coughing.. I want to cry.. Cry because I did nothing but try to be cooperative, tried to stay out of trouble but matt did this.. " Klaus His face is so blue.. " "He'll be alright.. " He gave me some water and I stopped coughing for a while.. " Stefan, right? " Elijah asked and I nodded.. " How did this happen.. Who did it?" "I- I was just going inside and i-i- someone locked it.. I don't know who.. " I lie because I know if matt is working here, he might be in need of money and I don't want to ruin anyone's life by taking away their source of income.. I know he did something to me which might have costed my life but.. I don't want to be the villain of anyone else's story.. And it's not just that.. What if someone's life depends on the money he's earning.. " Do you recognise the face?? Come.. " They put my arm around their shoulder and lifted me from the chair giving me enough support to walk.. I was gasping for air when I felt klaus rubbing my back to comfort me.. They took me to a table and I saw matt eyeing me nervously.. He looked scared sort of.. Elijah again asked me if anyone of the employees did it and if could tell by seeing the faces.. "S-Sorry s-sir.. I- d- don't know.. " "It's okay.. Calm down.. You can go home now and don't get sick.." I nodded and started to leave.. Still feeling a bit cold .. Shit I want a cigarette.. My hearts beating so fast and my arms are shaking again.. Not because of cold.. Because of the need.. No matter how good I try to be or try to do.. Something always goes wrong. Fuck it. I find myself going to Nate's and I know I don't want to but I can't stop myself.. It's just.. I need to.. I knock at his door and he welcomes me in and I ask him " N-nate.. I need a favour.. Please.. " "Yea sure stef I'll do it if I can for sure.. " "I- I need a cigarette.. I don't have money right now but- I'll p-pay you back.. I promise! " "Stefan it's not about the money.. You're not allowed to smoke.. What are you doing here.. " "Please I need to- my heart's going to come out of my chest please-" He shakes his head and starts calling someone.. "Damon, it's nate.. Stefan's here.. " He starts telling him I lose all ground beneath me and my knees buckle.. " N-NO- PLEASE- PLEASE DON'T TELL HIM I'LL- I'LL DO ANYTHING- I PROMISE PLEASE- DON'T TELL HIM-" I start trying to run away and he catches me and I know I'm shaking hard right now.. He's holding me tight, but not painfully and I'm squirming to get out of his hold..
Damon's pov:
I was sitting around drinking tea when I got a call from nate.. He told me Stefan's there.. By the tone of it it didn't look like he was there for something normal and casual.. He went to smoke.. Shit. I told this boy so many times that he can't but he just doesn't learn. I speed to his house and in what felt like 5-10 mins I'm there.. The door is opened with stefan screaming for release and Nate is holding him trying to stop him from getting away.. I close the door and go to him. My blood is boiling.. I'm so angry right now.. How could he throw away months worth of effort.. In the beginning he used to tremble and beg me to let him take a hit but then he understood the need for him to stop really fast and never had a lot of issues and I thought it was all good now.. "STEFAN?!" "no- please no- let me go please- please-" He was breathing heavily , trying to get away , he looked so scared.. Nate let go of him.. but Stefan didn't move.. he was just sitting on the floor leaning to the leg of a chair nearby, shaking and shivering.. " STEFAN I TOLD YOU YOU CAN'T SMOKE! YOU REALLY WANT TO THROW EVERYTHING THAT WE WORKED FOR AWAY?! HUH?? DO YOU ACTUALLY WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE FUCKED UP?! " I grabbed his arm, which was surprisingly cold.. and got him up.. He was supporting himself on me.. It looked like he couldn't or didn't want to stand up on his own.. He looked lost.. The same lost 5 year old boy who couldn't stand after being whipped by father, leaning on to me, staring into nothingness, shivering because of fear and pain.. " ANSWER ME STEFAN?!? " He flinched and jumped a little but I was too mad to care.. "N-nee- needed to s-smoke.. " " THAT'S YOUR ANSWER?! HUH?! GOD STEFAN HOW COULD YOU BE SO UNGRATEFUL AND THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE LIKE THAT?! I SWEAR TO GOD-" I involuntarily raised my hand in frustration and he flinched hard, shivering, and bawling started trying to get away and succeeded.. What happened? Why was he so scared.. Was he this scared of me.. Was i actually scaring him THAT MUCH?! "Please I'm sorry- don't hurt me- please-" Shit.. He is frightened because he thought I raised that hand to hurt him- "no- I won't do anything- just let me go- f-father please-" What? Did he think I was father? Oh my gosh- he's having a panic attack.. Dr. Gilbert told me about this.. Once when Stefan had been in a similar condition in front of him, he told me what it was.. It was like he used to get totally lost in another world.. Totally not able to understand what's happening.. Panicked.. That's what is happening to him right now.. And it doesn't happen just like that. I triggered it.. It's my fault.. "Stefan-" "Please just let me go- I'll never come back I p-promise- I'll never b-bother you again- father it hurts- j-just-" He is panting hard and bringing his hands together, begging father- me- not to hurt him.. Nate's looking at us helplessly as he watches the barely 16 year old boy writhe on the floor begging for mercy.. Knees to his chest, hair disheveled.. It's not a good sight.. He's starting to sweat because he's so scared.. He keeps trying to get as far away for me as possible.. "No more- can't take it-" He's sobbing and weeping utterly helplessly and his gut wrenching cries are creating a hole in my heart- he is starting to droop down to the floor and I go near him, to make him snap out of this.. "Stefan it's me- it's your brother- Damon.. " I try to hold his hands and he's trying hard to her away but I am keeping him in place because he might hurt himself like this.. "N-no- y-you're lying- my brother is- is not like you- he c-cares about me- nev- never yells- gentle- helps- patiently.. never hurts- you hurt- you're f-father-" He's getting exhausted because of crying and screaming now.. He's speaking half sentences.. He's shaking his head.. It's lolling around.. He's shaking.. Shivering.. He's so scared- " Where- DAMON?! DAMON PLEASE?! Help-" "Stefan it's me- " I shake him.. Nate quickly bring water and I make him drink it and he chokes a bit, I rub him back comfortingly and that soothes him.. He is returning back to normal now.. "D-damon?" I hug him as I hear that but he doesn't return the hug.. He pulls away from me.. There's this disappointed expression on his face that makes me realise I screwed up.. I acted like father.. I mean minus the barbaric stuff.. I take his hand but he takes it away.. He's scared of me.. But what hurts more is that I disappointed him.. Broke his trust.. He couldn't believe that I would ever raise my hand and yell at him.. I was so past the line.. I've seen how he flinches whenever someone is shouting and this brought back memories.. Terrible ones.. I take him home and he walks beside me but considerably far from me.. With his head down.. God.. Tomorrow is his birthday.. It's not like we have ever celebrated it, not like he ever asked anyone to do anything for him.. But now that we don't live with father anymore.. I thought we would do something together.. I need to fix this.. How am I going to fix this?
Authors note: okay so this is done and now I'll write two more chapters and an epilogue :) also this was such a sad chapter I felt bad for Stefan and Damon.. But they're gonna be okay dw.. Also look how good Stefan is, literally forgave matt😩 Nate is just someone who wanted money but I wanted to show that he cares about Stefan enough to refuse that and prioritize his health.. Also as someone requested, klaus and Elijah are here ooop haha.. I hope you liked this , review please ;) and take care, love you <3
