Crossing Borders

Chapter 3

I tossed and turned all night. I feel like I agreed too soon to this thing. Am I absolutely crazy?

I already know the answer to the question.

But Adam knew what he was offering. He was raised in a family of businessmen and marketeers, he knew who to pick for his proposition. Someone who couldn't say no.

The glittering ideas of publishing parties and public readings. My books are standing on bookshelves in countries I've never set foot in. People reading and sending me their reviews and reaction videos.

It's all very romanticized in my head.

But I can see myself getting one step closer. The big publishers. The big leagues. Everything.

My methods, on the other hand.

Not to mention; how will I tell everyone?

"You can't tell anyone for this to work. Not even your parents. Not even Lena." Adam had said. No one can know this isn't real.

But Lena would never believe me if I told her I fell in love with that man overnight. If it was anyone else, maybe. Adam? Absolutely not.

I give up on sleeping and get up, made my way to the kitchen to find something to eat, when I see she got up as well.

"Hey, are you okay? You seemed weird when you came back from work." She inquired, holding a glass of water in her hand.

"Yeah. Perfect." I started, but she looked at me pointedly, obviously not believing me. "Actually, I... I need to tell you something."

"Sure, go ahead." She perked.

"But... promise you won't be mad? Or like, judge me or whatever."

She faked pain by putting her hand on her heart. "Is that what you think of me, Laylay? You know me better than that." She said, taking a seat in front of me, attentive.

"I... I'm kind of seeing someone." I start.

Lena looked startled, like this is the farthest thing she expected to hear.

"Really? Layla! That's so great! Is it serious? I know you don't do casual. But why didn't you tell me earlier! You know I would've 1000% been there for you, even tried to scare him off to see just how committed he is." She started rambling excitedly like Lena usually does.

"Because... I don't think you'll approve." My voice started dropping.

She looked at me weirdly, probably asking herself how I could possibly think that. And suddenly, it's like the pieces all fit into place in her head, and her jaw dropped.

"Is it.... Omar?" She almost whispered her name. And I'm suddenly relieved she thought it was him. Maybe then she wouldn't be so shocked that it's actually Adam.

"Ummm, no" I chuckled, "it's Adam, actually."

"WHAT?" She practically screamed.

Maybe she's not taking it that much better.

"Layla are you insane? He's been tormenting you ever since we were freshmen!" She started gesturing to things that don't exist. "Layla, you'd tell me if you were in trouble, right? Is he holding something over you? You know I'd never judge whatever it is."

"No. No. Nothing like that." I started trying to spell out an intricate enough lie. "It's just, he's not as bad as we thought he was."

"If he's not bad, smile at him, maybe say hi, but don't go and date him!"

"We realised that we have feelings for each other. We just couldn't wait any longer."

"What feelings? You DESPISE him! And what about Omar, you've been fantasizing about him ever since our freshmen year. Are you trying to tell me you're over him just like that and already seeing someone else?"

"Actually, we're, um, getting engaged."

I'm pretty sure she was about to have a heart attack right then and there.

"Layla. This doesn't have anything to do with your citizenship, does it?" She whispered. She started calming down, and her eyes were looking at me softly. I hated it.

It's not that I hate her, but while she's also Egyptian, her entire family has lived here since forever. They're all citizens, they have nothing to worry about. The for was born here, and she's a constant reminder that I was not.

"Lena, seriously, no. Do you honestly think I'm that low?"

"I would never think that of you. But I know how much you want to stay. I'm just...asking."

"No, Lena. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't think that bad of me." I lied again. Wow, manipulative much, Layla?

"I'm sorry Laylay. You know I'm happy for you, and I'm here for you. If he makes you happy then I'm happy. I just need you to know that you can trust me; we don't do secrets for a reason. I'd trust with my life."

"I know." I spoke softly, tears trapped in my eyes.
I needed to get out of here. I turned around, too scared to even say goodnight in case my voice breaks. And in case my own self-restraint breaks and I end up telling her everything.

"I love you Layla." She speaks. I don't even say it back.

***

Back in bed, I grab ahold of my phone and start scrolling through my messages.

*** *** ****:
Hey

Are you awake

Your phone says you're online

Are you here

Answerrrr

I need to tell you something

They all come one after the other, and they're from an unsaved number.

Layla:
Who is this? I write, even though I have a pretty good idea.

*** *** ****:
Wow hurtful.

I'm the love of your life and future husband

I hope you don't have more than one of those. That would do no good in narrowing it down.

I sighed.

Layla:
What do you want, Adam?

*** *** ****:
First save my number

Then find something nice to wear

I quickly saved his number before texting him backs

Layla:
What for?

Adam:
I forgot to tell you, but my sister's getting married in a week.

I almost forgot about that myself.

Layla:
I don't have something that nice. That wedding must be extravagant.

Adam:
Fine. Shopping it is. Take Lena or something. She always dresses like someone straight out of a magazine.

I sighed. Is that boy stupid.

Layla:
Adam. I can't.

Adam:
If you're already backing out on the deal then you're even more flaky than I thought you were.

Layla:
Flaky? Wow

I can't because....

I can't afford a new dress right now.

God, did he seriously need me to spell it out.

Adam:
Oh.

No worries.

That's it. He didn't say anything else.

What kind of message is that. What do I even do right now.

I decided I'm going to ignore this entire conversation and just go to sleep. I set my alarm, locked my phone, and hope that by tomorrow I'll actually wake up from the horrid dream that was today's events.