Sinful Graditude

Realization

I sat in biology class in silence. I couldn't get what she did out of my head, what was she hiding from me? her voice came in my head "he's not the guy you think you want" I closed my eyes and placed my head on my desk, after some time I looked around the classroom and couldn't concentrate. When the professor had his back turned I left the class. Out of 50 students in the class I doubt he would notice my absence. I walked down the hallway and began to cry tear after tear came down and they didn't stop. I felt so weak and abit embarrassed knowing I just started and all this drama was consuming me, I saw a few students look at me and talk as they saw me cry, this made me speed walk into the bathroom, I sat in the stall for hours on end. I missed most my classes that day and needed help. I called my mom just to see how everything was going.

Alison-hey mom

Alison's mother-honey! How are you, how's everything?

Alison-Good I guess

Alison mother-That's wonderful sweetheart your father and I are having a blast here even though we miss you dearly

Hearing that mom was having much more fun than I was made me even more upset.

Alison-Miss you too mom, hey I got to go tell dad I love him.

Alison's mother-sure will, but sweetheart is there a reason why you called now ? Are you in class?

Alison-I'm in the bathroom and no just checking in (I lied)

Alison mother-oh well alright, get to class missy we love you dearly.

Alison-Love you too bye.

I closed my phone and sat in silence, all I could hear was the dripping sound of the toilet's and my thoughts floating through my head. I stayed in the bathroom for hours until school had finished. When I finally got out I went straight home. I layed my bed and tried to decide if I was seriously going through depression. I had skipped school for three days but was giving in my work online. I noticed my patterns of sleeping, eating, and doing work I needed to break out of that cycle and decided to go to a club. I texted my friend Mila whom which I became close to in my economics class.

Alison: hey mila, club tonight? 7:30 sharp.

Mila: I'm in! Your place or my place?

Alison: your place, I need to get away from this hell hole

Mila: Now that's what I'm talking about, i'm in! and hey I havven't seen you in school for a couple of days.. You okay?

Alison: not really that's exactly why I need the club.

Mila: gotcha nothing like a few drinks that can't cure the soul aha anyways text me later!

I put my phone down and got dressed. I remember I was 17 but knew of this club that permitted 17 and older as long as your birthday was coming up. I was so excited that night. I got dressed and put some heels on I had gotten from Arizona but never got to use. I headed outside the hotel building dressed up calling a taxi, I called mila and told her I was in the taxi on my way. "Awesome I'll ring you up if I'm still not down" "alright see you in a few" I closed my phone. "Going to a club this late at night" the driver said. "Yup, a girl's got to live" I said smiling. "Of course" he said. "Um can you make a right and go straight" I said pointing ahead. "My pleasure" he said turning the car towards the direction. When we came to a stop I gave him his money "just leave it on the seat he said without turning around. "Okay?" I said leaving it. Once I got out the car sped off. What the fuck was his problem I thought laughing at the idea of what my dad told me in Arizona before I came here. "You will meet crazy people, it's a matter of if you let them make you crazy or if you know they are just plain crazy" the thought of his quote made me miss him a bit. I shook the feeling off and rang Mila's doorbell. She didn't answer but buzzed me upstaired. I came up and entered her room. "Alison!" She yelled tripping over putting her heels on. "Let me help you with that" I said getting down and strapping them in. "Ready for tonight" I said getting back up "HELL YEAH" she said grabbing hugging me then going after her purse. "do you have ypur ID" she said me "duh" I said. We walked off calling for a cab and I knew tonight would be amazing.