Crimson Tear [ Avilio x reader ]

06 | Confession

"I was about ten years old. There was some circus troupe in the town, named 'Alexander' or something."

The three of us sat around the campfire, watching the glow of the amber flames. Nightfall has fallen pretty quickly, the dark sky stretched above our heads like a thick blanket dotted with constellations. No one was awake except us, so the silence was slightly eerie but also comfortable. 

Nero poured Avilio and I a mug of coffee. I accepted mine graciously, appreciating the warmth the mug provided for my fingertips. The coffee wasn't that great, but its bitterness soothed the raw feeling in my throat.

"Vanno and I really wanted to go," Nero continued with his narration, "We slipped out of Sunday mass and swiped some cash from Dad's wallet, but Dad found out right away. He arranged my face for that one."

Nero closed his eyes and smiled warmly at the memory. 

"It sure was fun though," He opened his eyes once more, "Having something like that come to a nothing town like ours. For a while, we practiced together, just like what you were doing. It was all we thought about."

Avilio stared at him intently. However, I couldn't stomach Nero's story. I couldn't bring myself to look at him after knowing what he did. Instead, I stared at my drink, pretending to listen.

"Then we showed Frate and Fio, and they went totally wild, though they got bored pretty quickly." 

My heart ached at hearing Fio's name. She's one of my best friends. Flashbacks of her wedding played out in front of me. It felt so long ago. 

"You an only child?" Nero asked Avilio.
"Yeah," Avilio replied, smiling jokingly, "As the cliche goes, I went on to become a gangster."

All I could think was lies, lies, lies.

"Well, that explains your little trick before. You were a bad kid." Nero said jokingly, smiling.
"My hands shook at first," Avilio said, looking at his hand, "But now, they move before I even think about it."

Nero smiled. I don't. I continue taking small sips from my drink.

"Eloise, you don't have any siblings either, right?" Nero interrupted my thoughts. I turned my head only to meet a pair of eyes that was hiding a pang of worry. I must have been too quiet. 

I nodded.

"What happened to your parents?" He pressed on. 
"Dunno," I shrugged with one shoulder, "They never wanted me in the first place, anyways. I never went back home cause it was always a living hell. I ended up being taken care of by a friend's family." 

I look down and then took a sip of my drink. It tasted even more bitter after getting flashbacks of my childhood. 

"That must have been rough." Nero frowned.

I waved a hand in assurance. I caught Avilio looking at me with guilt in his eyes. His lips pressed firmly into a thin line, almost as if he was disappointed with himself. Then, he turned to Nero. 

"What was your first job?" Avilio asked him.

Nero immediately frowned deeply and furrowed his eyebrows.

"I went to lean on a guy who was filching money off the family. I was fourteen. I think it was..Lagusa, something like that."

I flinched but held my composure. I turned to look at Avilio, and that's when I see it. The burning, burning, burning, rage. The burning hatred. It burned brighter than the fire in front of us.

"You weren't alone, right?" Avilio asked casually, smiling. Almost as if that burning hatred and desire for vengeance went away in a flick.
"There were four of us, including me," Nero replied, "It was lousy work."

Silence lingered in the air for a while, and to me, it looked like daggers were hanging above me.

"Did you kill him?" Avilio questioned.
"He made a move on us first," He replied, "After that, there was no stopping it. I shot at the two kids who ran away. A girl and a boy. But I didn't get them. That day, I...ever since then, I've just thrown myself into it. "
"And now you're a penniless runaway." Avilio joked.
"Yeah. I'm a camper who does a little juggling on the side." He smiled, taking a long sip of his drink. 

Later that night, we all went to sleep in our tent. However, I couldn't sleep. My heart was racing, and recalling the whole conversation that night felt like a noose around my neck.

I heard someone shuffling and heading out of the tent. I slowly sat up and spotted Avilio sitting in front of the campfire, with a piece of paper in his hands. Then, I got up and crept behind him.

"There..was one..more.." He muttered harshly.

One more? What is he talking about? What is that piece of paper?

"Avilio?" I whispered, staring at him with wide orbs as he immediately whipped his head around.
"Eloise?" He whispered back in surprise, "couldn't sleep?"

I nodded. Then, he patted on the spot next to him. I sat down. 

"What are you reading?" I asked, pointing at the paper he was holding.

He sighed and looked down.

"Avilio?" I mumbled. 
"It's the letter I received a while back, with all their names," He showed me the paper, letting me read, "But a name is missing. According to what Nero said, there were four of them. The paper only mentions three." 

Shivers traveled along my spine, and my stomach churned. I squeezed my hands together. 

"I'll do this." Avilio said, placing his hand on the top of my hands.
"Avilio, I want you to be happy," I looked at him, tears gathering in my eyes, "Will killing all of them make you happy?"
"I don't know, but they robbed me of everything. Our family did nothing wrong, Eloise. They were innocent."

He reached out a hand and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. His hand slowly made its way to my cheek, and he caressed it softly with his thumb. His eyes held some sort of gentleness in them at that moment.

"It's my sin to bear, Eloise." He mumbled, pleading with me to understand that.
"No," I shook my head and placed my hand on top of his. I glared at him with determination. "Your sin will also be mine to bear." 
"Eloise-"
"I don't want to lose you anymore. I'm tired of that. Wherever you go, I will go. I don't care what you say." 

Without realizing, a teardrop rolled down my cheek. He gently wiped it away with his thumb and leaned in closer.

My heart was pounding, a wild thing in my ribcage, and I wondered if he could hear it. His hand remained on my cheek as he inched closer, and he then tilted his head slightly. I squeezed my eyes shut.

He locked his lips on mine. His lips were soft, and I pressed mine against his. The kiss was tender, but it was electric. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and his hand snaked around my waist, pulling me closer. Every second that passed gave me a rush of adrenaline, and for a moment, I didn't want it to be end. 

When he parted his lips from mine, I felt a pang of disappointment, but Avilio wrapped his arms around me. He pulled me closer to his chest, and I can almost smell the cologne from his coat. He buried his face in the crook of my neck, and when he spoke, his breath against my skin made it tingle.

"I promise you this. No matter who enters your life, I will love you more than any one of them."

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(A/N):
Hey everyone! I hope you haven't forgotten this story yet! It's been so long, I know, and I'm sorry about that :(
It's been really hard trying to find motivation to write. Can anyone recommend some tips on how to be motivated? I would really appreciate that <3 
Enjoy the chapter! Thank you for choosing this book to read! :^)