I'm Fine (Cameron Dallas)

Chapter 1

I remember that it hurt. Looking at him hurt. The girl sitting with him isn't me. It's his dream girl, my best girl friend. I'm his best friend and I seem to always forget that when I'm with him. He makes me become lost in my thoughts. He makes me have daydreams about him and what it'd be like to say "I love you" without any restrictions or penalties. I'm just sick of holding back.

"Alyssa?" I hear my brother's voice call from behind me.

"Oh, hey Matt." I jolt out of my daze and watch my bro sit beside me with his lunch tray.

"Why aren't you sitting with Cam and Courtney?"

I point to the two making out, trying to shield my eyes by looking the opposite way as I was before, when I feel Matt's hand resting on my back.

"I know it hurts but you'll find someone soon."

"I don't want just anyone Matthew..."

He sighs and picks his tray back up and walks away. That's what people usually do when they give up on me. Just get up and walk away. As far as possible because all I do is create drama. Or at least that's what they say.

•~•~•~•

The school day ends with the daily sound of the bell we all look forward to. I walk to my locker and place all my books and binders in when I feel hands wrap onto my eyes from behind me and I could tell who it was just by his amazing presence.

"Guess who!"

"Hey Cam" I giggle and whip my body around to see his killer smile, smiling at me and only me.

"Want to walk home together?" He smiles as I shut my locker and he resumes to put his one arm around me.

Cameron always treats me like I'm his girlfriend besides the kisses and sex of course. He holds my hand for who knows why, wraps his arm around me, cuddles with me while we watch TV or movie, and so on. Those are the times I enjoyed the most.

"Sure. What about Courtney?"

"She has a doctor's appointment and won't be back till later tonight."

"So you plan on ditching me half way through the night?" I tease but I was kind of serious.

"Not if you don't want me to." He looks down at me as we approach the outside of the school.

"Nah, do whatever you want." I say to be nice but I really did want him to spend time with me all night.

He just nods not really deciding yet, but we continue walking all the way to my house. Cameron's house was literally the one beside mine where we often even talked to eachother from our bedroom windows when we were kids. We always got in trouble when we were younger and I'm glad it stayed the same. Cam was almost like my second brother, aside from Matt, my actual brother of course, and his mom and sister were really close to me also.

My mom and dad divorced when I was 5 and my mom moved to Miami, Florida. I occassionally go see her in the summer, but for now, I just live here in LA with my dad and Matt. I wouldn't dream of moving in with my mom because that would make me leave everything I know and love behind; meaning Cameron.

"So how are you and Nash?" Cam asks me.

"Oh, I broke up with him yesterday." I say with my head down hoping he wouldn't ask why.

"Why?" Of course....

"Because of two reasons, he asked me to send him, you know... pictures, and when I didn't he just made me feel really bad about myself."

"I swear to God I'm going to kill that guy." He says with his fists clenching and I had to place my hand on his strong arm to calm him down.

"No Cam, he's your best friend."

"Doesn't mean I'm letting him get away with it!" He lets out a deep breath of frustration and calms down some more. "What's the second reason?"

"Oh... um..." My palms begin to get sweaty and my breathing deepens but I knew I couldn't lie to him. "Because I'm in love with someone else."

He looks at me as if he were shocked as we arrive at my front door. "Who?!"

Here's where I draw the line. I could never tell him the truth, it'd crush our friendship and possibly his relationship. It'd also end my friendship with Courtney if she found out.

"I really don't want to say."

"Alyssa...we've been friends since we were 4, I really think you can tell me." He says as we enter my house and he closes the door behind us.

I drop my bookbag to the floor and he copies the action then follows me into my kitchen.

"Cam, I really don't want to tell you. Can you just respect that?"

"Fine." He sighs and comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my small waist as I reach for the bag of Doritos for him and I to share.

"Cam? I can't-" before I could even finish my sentence, he lifts me up to reach the chips and sets me back down gently like it was no struggle for him.

He laughs as I give him a raised eyebrow at how well he knows me. How well we know eachother is incredible really.

"I think I keep forgetting how much muscle you have now that we're not 10 year olds." I giggle and he chuckles back.

I turn around with the family size bag of chips and follow him upstairs to my room. My room was a pretty huge room. It had two levels. It was a loft kind of style. Under the loft was my computer and desk under the stairs. then on the otherside was my bed. When you go up the steps to the loft type area, I had a huge sitting room that was extremely cozy. A couch and the other option of sitting on beanbag chairs and a bunch of huge pillows, scattered the floor, where you can watch my big, flat screen TV. Ever since Matt hit it off with his vine fame, we've been VERY good financially.

As Cam follows me up the steps to my loft, I swear I could feel his eyes watching my butt but it was probably not even true. He wouldn't really ever do that to someone he treats as his second sister.

"So what do you wanna watch?" I ask as he plops down on the biggest bean bag chair I have that Cam and I often cuddle on, which is what I think he's expecting for me to do once I finish putting something on the TV.

"How about Friends?"

That was our favorite show to watch together. It was a great show to watch just to unwind from the possibly horrible school day we just had.

I turn on the show from Netflix and join Cam and snuggle my small figure into his muscular, comforting body and begin gluing my eyes to the TV.

"Alyssa?" I feel the vibration of his deep voice on my cheek as I rest it on his chest.

"Yeah?" I say without lifting my head.

"I hope you know that you can tell me anything."

I wish I could tell him so bad but what am I supposed to say? Oh um, I've been madly in love with you Cameron Dallas since fricken 8th grade? No, just no....

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How was the first chapter?! Please continue reading! I really think this book is going to be one of my strongest stories.