Wished Away : Loki x neutral!reader

21. Clint Strikes Back

Sitting on the couch, you're reading another book for you and Loki's "book club". The shining, a classic Stephen King novel that you never got around to reading.

The others are all doing their own thing. Steve and Bucky are downstairs training and everyone else is upstairs either eating or watching television.

Turning to the next page, you hear rustling from above you. You pause from reading and look up. The only thing above you were the vents. Probably a lost bird or something.

You look back to your book and immediately hear a loud metallic clang followed by a scream then a heavy thud. Looking up in shock, you see Clint on the ground clutching his side in pain.

"Oh my god Clint," you exclaim.

Clint groans, "That hurt like a buttcheek on a stick."

"I bet, that sounded like it hurt," Sam says, the movie already having been paused for awhile.

"Clint, do you actually spend time in the vents? Is that a thing you do or is this just a one time thing?" you ask.

Clint sits up and rubs his shoulder. "I mean, maybe? Yeah. I have a little pillow fort hidden in there. Don't even try looking for it Tony," he answers.

"Wasn't going to, Birdbrain," Tony says, not even looking up from his StarkPad.

"I'm going to loose it," you say. "I can't believe we headcanoned that and was right about it."

" 'We' as in the fandom from your timeline? You all headcanoned that I spend my free time in the vents? Why?"

"Because it's funny, and ya know birds sometimes build nests in vents and you're Hawkeye," you reply.

"Haha, very punny," he jokes, pretending to laugh. "Now could somebody please help me up and get me some ice, I'm in pain!"

After Clint gets treated back to health by Nat, everyone goes back to their own thing until Clint decides to make himself a snack.

"Hey, my tortilla is on fire," he says walking into the kitchen.

"What?" Steve asks looking over at him.

"My tortilla is on fire."

"No it isn't, you'd be freaking out if it was. Stop joking Clint."

"No I'm serious. My tortilla is sitting in the toaster oven, on fire," he says.

Steve huffs and gets up to check in the kitchen. You follow just to see what Clint did this time, making sure to keep a good distance between you and Steve in case it was a prank.

Steve walks to the toaster oven and opens it. A tortilla sits on is grill, a huge fire coming off of it. The tortilla is almost completely black.

"Holy... you weren't joking Clint."

Steve quickly grabs a plate and knife and scrapes the tortilla onto the plate before setting it in the sink and turning on the water. He turns to Clint when the fire is out.

"How in the world did you do this?" Steve says utterly shocked.

"Well, I've seen you cook tortillas in the toaster oven before so I decided to do it myself. I guess I lost track of time... I didn't know it would bubble like that!" Clint explains.

"Clint we cook CORN tortillas in the toaster oven, not flour toasters. Flour tortillas bubble and this type of thing will happen if you aren't paying attention. Corn tortillas don't." Steve gently scolds. He sighs, "But you did the right thing, acted calmly, got help from a responsible adult."

"I'm an avenger, of course I'll act calmly during a fire. I acted calmly during Ultron!" Clint boasts. "Anyways, I'm surprised the fire didn't go out before. I left the door closed on the toaster oven to keep in the oxygen and eventually snuff out the fire, but it just got bigger when I checked..."

You start laughing. "Oh my god, Clint! Toaster ovens aren't vacuumed sealed! There's literally gaps on the sides of the door!"

"Oops?" Clint responds.

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a/n: the tortilla incident is based on an actual event in my life where i did the same thing. the conversation is basically word for word the same one i had with my dad-