Ragnarocc

What's My Line

"Loki, no!" I gasped dramatically, standing over a man who was definitely not Loki, "You can't

die on me! What about all those fun brotherly bonding moments we had?"

"I'm sorry, brother," said Not Loki while the chorus behind us continued to sing eerily and off key. "Sorry about that one time I stabbed you. ...And the other time where I also stabbed you. Just, consider this an apology for all my misdeeds."

Oh fuck what's my line? I cleared my throat, putting on my shitty manly Thor voice, "I'll tell our bitch ass father what you did here today."

The crowd gasped a bit at that, but Not Odin who was sitting on the couch just shook his head and ate another grape. Not Loki exclaimed dramatically, "I didn't do it for him." He then flopped against the stage, pretending to be dead.

I shot a glance at the audience, my next line catching in my throat as I spotted Thor. What the fuck was he doing back on Asgard?? We made eye contact for a moment, but it didn't matter. The show must go on. I looked to the sky and screamed, "NOOOOOOOOO!" being sure to mock him as much as possible. The chorus picked up and the other actors continued with the show. Thor decided to wait respectfully for the play to end, as any decent person would. There are certain things you don't interrupt, and my kick ass performance is one of them.

I stood and took a dramatic bow while staring directly at him. Once the delightful applause of the audience ceased, he ran up onto the stage and grabbed my arm, pulling me off in Not Odin's direction. "Like my performance?" I grinned.

"What the hell is going on?" he demanded, "Since when did you decide to stay here?"

"Since you abandoned me in pursuit of bigger, better things off in the nine realms," I sighed, putting on my pity voice, "Guess my friendship wasn't enough for you. And of course, after Loki's tragic death, I've run completely out of people to care about me!" This, of course, was a lie. I had great friends on Midgard who definitely cared about me, but I just couldn't resist laying on the guilt as much as possible.

"Don't do this now, please," Thor pushed me aside and marched over toward Not Odin, "So. What's with the play?"

"It's the Tragedy of Loki of Asgard," he explained casually, eating another grape. I nodded solemnly in the background. "The people wanted to commemorate him."

"Is that what the statue is for too?" Thor squinted at the glistening statue of Loki that was T-posing above the crowd. "A little better looking than when he was alive, wouldn't you say?"

"Oh for sure," I laughed, "Sure was nice of your father to get that made. It was also nice of him to let me play you in the show, Thor."

"You did decent," he admitted reluctantly, before lifting a spooky looking demon skull and holding it up in front of Not Odin. "But do you know what this is?"

"The skull of Surtur," he nodded, "A formidable weapon."

"Lock this in the vault," Thor instructed a nearby guard, "See, I've been having this recurring dream lately, something about the fall of Asgard?"

"Ragnarok?" I asked, having brushed up on my lore during my time here.

He nodded in confirmation before continuing, "And then what do I find but the nine realms descended into chaos, and here you are, sitting on a couch, in a bathrobe, eating grapes."

"Well, I've been very busy with meetings-" Not Odin started to defend himself.

Thor sighed and gave his hammer a flip, "You're really going to make me do it?" Oh shit, things were not boding well for His Royal Imposter right now.