Angel Baby

Tough days

[DEMI]

I leaned against the doorway, watching Rachel sleep somewhat peacefully. Rex was staring at me from his spot under the curly haired girls head. Sighing, I shut the door and went to the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of wine. I wasn't going to have much, maybe only a single glass. The red liquid splashed against the table because I poured to fast.

"Fuck." I muttered setting the bottle down to wipe up my mess with a napkin.

When I finished, I started my sipping. The wine was bitter than most but it didn't really bother me. As I drank, my thoughts filled my head.

'What the hell amni doing? I can't even pour a glass of wine, how the hell am I supposed to raise a person? I'm screwed.'

When I finished, I didn't see the harm in another glass. This process repeated until the bottle was half full. I cursed at myself again, knowing I shouldn't have drank that much. I sighed and slipped the bottle on the top shelf and went to watch TV.

Cinderella was sitting on the couch so I picked her up and held her on my lap, my fingers running through her curly fur. As I watch Law and Order, my mind began to drift again, this time telling me how much I'm gonna screw Rachel up. This brought tears to my eyes. I might not have known the girl long but I really did care about her. I didn't want her to struggle or feel bad about herself.

It became hard to breathe and my eyes shut tightly. The tighter my throat got the more I just wanted to throw up everything. I forced myself up and went outside, my two small dogs following after me. Once outside, I took a big, shaky breath to calm me down. I sat down on the steps of the porch and buried my face into my hands, a few salty tears leaking out. One of the dogs walked up to me and nudged my leg. Looking up through slightly blurred vision, I saw Batman looking up at me. His tail wagged a little and he whined with a tilt of his head. I couldn't help but chuckle, reaching down to pick him up. Immediately, he started to lick away my tears.

"I love you, too." I mumbled. 

A few minutes passed in silence, both dogs curled at my sides, when suddenly, a loud cry sounded. I sighed softly, standing up. Making my through the house, I opened her door and saw Rachel sitting up in bed, crying. Rex was sitting behind her, his head on her shoulder. I walked into the room, shushing her gently. 

"Shh, baby, it's ok, it was just a dream." I mumbled, scooping her up into my arms gently.

"N-No!" She sobbed.

I kissed her forehead, rocking her side to side, humming a soft tune. After about ten minutes, she still wouldn't stop crying. 

"Rachel, baby, talk to me, what happened?"

She just shook her head, wheezing for any sort of air. I was holding her up right in an attempt to help her breathe but it was no use unless she could actually take a deep breathe. I put her head to my chest, supporting her weight with the other hand. 

"Listen to me, Angel, breathe in....breathe out...." I muttered.

She tried to do it but it was struggled. I repeated my instructions again and again, until she could do it right. Finally, after almost an hour, she was calm. I walked her out of the room and went downstairs. With one hand, I poured a glass of cold water and handed it to her. She turned her head.

"Just drink a little bit." I mumbled, kissing her head.

I put it to her lips again and this time, she took a sip.

"One more sip?"

She sipped it once more then pushed her face into my neck. I walked her back up to my room and laid with her, Rex and the other little dogs following suit. I faced her, running my fingers through her curly locks. Suddenly, she spoke.

"I'm sorry Demi, are you still mad at me?" She whispered, looking up at me with her different colored eyes.

I frowned at this and shook my head.

"I wasn't ever mad at you Rach, it's just...sometimes I have some tough days but I shouldn't have snapped at you."

"You're not mad?"

"No baby."

She nodded then cuddled close to me.

"Can I have tough days too?"

"Of course, everyone has them."

"Thank you Demi."

"You're welcome, Rachel, try and sleep."

I leaned in and kissed her forehead. For the first time in almost a week, we slept until the morning, more energized to face the next day, Rachel's first physical therapy session.