Me and Jason sped through the Misty forest, giggling with pride as we were finally confessing our true feelings. But suddenly, I heard footsteps behind me. I also heard a raspy voice getting closer and closer. The voice seemed to be yodelling In great pain. He was also mumbling something on the lines of "cool as a cucumber"
I spun around, like a spinning top, to see a huge sexy hunk of meat sparkling in the full moon like Robert pattinson. Only, it wasn't Robert. It was far better.
It was....
Ian-
Ian somerhalder
Or its true form
Ian smoulderhoulder.
*fangirls cutely*
"HEY" Jason erected. Who are you?
I forgot Jason was there for a sec. I mean you would too if this man was smirking at you in a forest full or flowers and Jack Frosts ice particles.
I. Smoulderhoulder spoke. His smoulder intensifying. Am Ian. And I can speak to pandas smouldering with desire like me. For you moonberry. You're cool as a slimy wet cucumber.
"W-what? Me? But I'm just, well...me! How could you like me?"
"WAIT A SMOULDERING SECOND. I THOUGHT U LOVED ME MOONBERRY"
Jason said with pure smouldering terror.
"Oh. Jason i was confused. I am iangender and smouldersexual. It's valid. But thank you for helping me discover who I really am."
"Ok moonberry. But remember, you will always be MY girl next door. And if we ever cross paths again. Just know I want to see you in the African mask like the good ol days. I love you, always and forever."
"well, I guess it's just you and..me now. In the moonlight Ian."
"Yes. That is true. The moon smouldering at our love. Want to eat our enemies and also possibly friends with me?"
"Sure! Let me miraculous African mask quick."
"No! You don't need that. It will remind you of Jason. I need your true smouldering form."
"..Ok baby."
5 and 3 quarter years later.
Jason the badboy has become a homosexual maid for Kurt and Blaine. And on the full moon days, he would become alpha gay and ravish them in bed.
Harry got out of the vending machine and realised his feelings for moonberry were only to hide the fact that he loved Louis Tomlinson. They are now raising a family of beautiful wigs.
Portuguese the hairy blonde hybrid is a new one direction member. Although they quit due to the assassination of Jack Black and his gold mine. So he took a group of misfits and outcasts, called the muppets (although it was those ones from Blaines fantasy) and they are now called the 69 positions 😈
As for moonberry and Ian smoulderhoulder, well, they had a demonic ritual using coconuts, they had to kill some celebs on the way (John Mayor, Logan Paul and Shane Dawson.) anyway the sacrifice was small as they became alpha and omega and had wolf-vampire babies and named one stinky.
Everything was smashing. And that, is the end of my unique life.
I, am truly, not like other girls.
End?
no its not lol
YOU ARE READING
What is this on Wattpad?
Humor"iM nOt LiKe OtHeR gIrLs" The most weirdest Wattpad story? Cliche main characters, vampires, werewolves, Jack black, All put together to be awful and to hopefully make you smile. (It started like that and then it just became insane so apologies 😭) ...
