Heartstrings

Chapter 8: Playing Games

Jake's Perspective

The look in Emma's eyes was like a slap in the face. If she was going to be like that, then I didn't want to work with her either.

I took my precious time gathering my notes and textbooks before I trudged over to her desk, and slowly set it all back up. When I sat down, she scrunched her nose then huffed and looked away - I was close to calling her out on her attitude when I realized that I probably reeked of Kelsey's unmistakable perfume.

I stared at my worksheet blankly as I recounted the events of last night -

When I'd gotten to Kelsey's house, she made it crystal clear what she was after - I'd hardly made it through the door when she all but pounced on me. She'd wrapped her arms around my neck - instantly smothering me with her tacky scent. It was a fruity, citrusy, sugary smell that gave me a headache and couldn't be a starker contrast to Emma's subtle scent.

It only took seconds for Kelsey to smash her lips onto mine, and I regretted my decision to meet up with her immediately. Her kiss was wet and sloppy but I kissed her back and tried to change her pace - still though, I just couldn't get into it. Her taste wasn't right. The way her hair felt in my hand wasn't right. Even the small moans she made through the kiss turned me off.

She pressed me against the wall of her foyer, knocking over a coat rack and a stack of books. I pulled away from her and looked around. She giggled and tugged on my shirt as she led me to her living room where she shoved me a little too forcefully onto the couch.

She stood in front of me and pulled her shirt off over her head and kissed my neck as she straddled me. In that moment, I realized that there was no part of Kelsey's skin that was going to change the way I felt about Emma. I was at a crossroads - to use and be used, and face the consequences later; or to stop now and face the loneliness without the added weight of shame.

Kelsey cupped my face with her hands and my heart shattered as I remembered the way Emma's fingertips felt on my face as she looked up at me with those wintery, grey eyes of hers. Kelsey moved her hand down and started unbuckling my belt, and I stopped her. I got up and clumsily apologized, making up some excuse for why I had to leave so abruptly.

I couldn't stay there for another second. I got in my car and drove off. A few miles away I pulled over by a peanut field and parked - I hit the steering wheel with my palm as my eyes welled with tears. I stayed there and sobbed pitifully as I tried to figure out what to do. I couldn't go home. I was too embarrassed to go back to Sam's and I couldn't bear to see Emma come back beaming from her stupid date with her stupidly perfect guy. And now I also couldn't stay at Kelsey's.

When I calmed down, I drove to McDonald's and got some food and used the restroom. After eating, I drove numbly to the high school parking lot where I'd resolved to stay the night. It wasn't the first time I'd slept in my car, but that night was particularly bleak.

When the sun rose, I watched the sky change colors, hoping the kaleidoscopic clouds would spell out some answers to all of my adolescent mysteries. But they left me hanging.

And now I had to deal with an indignant Emma for the next hour and a half. She glanced over at me impatiently as I stared off into space.

- Are you going to start working on the review sheet or are you waiting for me to give you the answers?

Her words snapped me back to reality and I looked over at her in disbelief.

- Wh- are you kidding me?

She raised an eyebrow and gave me a cold expression as she waited for an answer. I tried not to match her attitude but I was too tired to play this game -