Silly Points of Note

Safe Sex

Where was the first record in the bible of what we can call safe sex practiced?

“And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother” Gen. 28: 9

The story had it that Judah found a wife for his first son Er, but he died before they had any issue. Judah then told his second son Onan to have sex with Tamar his dead brother’s wife with the hope that she would get pregnant. However, the catch was that the son would not be regarded as Onan’s but Er’s, which apparently was something Onan was not particularly thrilled to do.

Onan on his part and completely aware of what he was about to do, slept with Tamar, and when he knew that he was about to release his sperm, he withdrew from her and the scriptures says he poured it on the ground. This is an aspect of safe sex as it concerns child spacing in particular.

But you know there is more to this story than the first time it was placed on record of someone doing this particular act. The first thing the story above tells us was that what Onan decided to do was only known by him. The fact that what he did came to light was because God decided to step in after he did it. God killed him.

Onan would not have slept with her in the open i.e. he accepted to do it and they did it in private. Another thing was that everyone knew what Onan was about to do as it concerned sleeping with Tamar and rearing up a child in his brother’s name. There was nothing out of the ordinary here since it was basically an eastern tradition of sorts but it was something that was commendable in their eyes. So Onan got some positive mileage here because he took up the responsibility of having sex with his dead brother’s wife and bearing a child with her that would be in the name of his brother.

Now we have mentioned two words that do not seem to go hand in hand these days: sex and responsibility. This should not be too much of a shock because we can clearly see from this story that the words were not compatible even then, even when there was this show of people having responsible sex.

Tamar must have been desirable and/or Onan must have been eyeing his brother’s wife for a while now or he must have just been plain horny. He did not have any qualms sleeping with Tamar and the thing here was that he would have kept on doing it until she took in. This little piece of information is important because it shows that Onan was set on enjoying sex with Tamar for as long as possible.

He was killing at least three birds with one stone. He did not like the fact that the child will not be his i.e. he liked Tamar to the point where he would love her to be the mother of his children. The second thing was that he was willing to still have his way with her and prolong this relationship as long as possible. The third thing was that he was ready to use this and get as much credit from his father and others in the eyes of tradition and taking up such a responsibility of giving up his seed to his brother’s name. Onan was going to have it all.

What would have happened if he had said no to his father’s demand and still put it out that he wanted to marry Tamar i.e. take her as his legal wife? It would have been the truth and whilst it may have brought up a certain degree of ignominy to his person, at least he would still be alive because God would not have struck him dead. The thing here is that he may have well married her or the worst thing that would happen would be for the father to find another next of kin to do the job.

No, Onan was not going to have any of that because he wanted her. He was more interested in enjoying the sex and prolonging it than any other thing. If God had not reacted to what he did, he would have continued doing this and no one would have been wiser unless Tamar decided to do something about it (and this will not be too difficult to imagine going by the way she decided to take matters into her hand when Judah started dragging his feet on his promise).

Now with the way things went down, it would be safe to assume that Onan would have used a condom if it existed. Of course the point here is not whether he used a condom or not but the motive behind what he did. He was conniving. He was ready to use everything to have his way and no one would have known if God had not acted in such a manner. I personally suspect that my girl Tamar would not have broadcasted the fact of what he was doing. She would have beating him at his game and still fulfill her objective of having a son in the name of her late husband.

The scripture records that his act displeased the Lord who slew him because of it. However, it may not have been the act itself but the motive because Onan was not forthright about his real intentions while misleading everybody else to think that he was doing what was expected of him. However, this was the very first time this act was recorded in scripture, could it be possible that God decided to kill him because it was the first time such an act was displayed? Alternatively, kill him because it was the first time such an act was displayed with such a set of motives behind it. It would be hard to assert that this must have been the first time ever that someone would have sex and poured out the seed rather than pour it in. Yet there could be an argument that there is always a first time for everything and God might have wanted to set a precedence of His will and feelings towards such by acting in such a manner.

Take the issue of evil; when was the first time that an act of evil occurred? What did God do when He noticed it for the first time? What was the act itself that God called evil? It is a good thing that this is also recorded in scriptures and it would be interesting to note God’s reaction to it.

The first time evil occurred was with the angel created as and called Lucifer. He did something that God called evil i.e. He found it to be evil and we will dwell on this first act of evil in the next Silly Points of Note.