Advice Request
This person has three crushes.
Answered Submission
Hello,
It certainly seems like a bit of a confusing situation, but let's see if we can untangle it a little bit, hm? So you have crushes on three different people, two your age, and one 25 year old, and one of the people your age likes you back. Let's start with the biggest issue that stands out to me. It is okay, and often times normal, for teenagers to develop crushes on adults (usually in their twenties or early thirties). In the words of psychologist Leslie Paige, they are "natural in terms of it happening frequently." What is important to understand here though, is that while it is normal to develop a crush on an adult in your life, it is not okay to pursue that crush in any way. From a legal standpoint, he is an adult and you are a minor. That's bad news, and a big no-no should anything become of your crush on him. From an emotional standpoint, you are in a completely different life stage than he is. You can't understand each other because he will always be older, and you will always be behind him.
As for your other crushes, I don't see anything wrong here. Just a mild case of confused emotions. So you like this person, and the feeling is mutual, but another girl lied and said they were dating? Honestly, hun, who cares? If she lied then that's a 'her' issue. I say wait it out for now. See what happens, and if one of your two crushes makes a move you can cross that bridge when you get to it. Ultimately, if you like this person and the issue is between them and another person, or you and another person as it seems to be with the girl from your bus, then you should look at the situation subjectively and not with all these other thoughts and issues in mind. Do you like them? Do they like you? Is there a reasonable issue or question stopping you from pursuing them? Crushes are hard, and when it comes down to it, it's up to you to figure out what you want and whether or not you want to act on the crush.
I hope this helps, love. Feel free to reach out again for more advice any time!
Stay strong,
The Advice Column Team
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