merder smut

I need you.

DONT JUDGE ME IK THIS IS BAD BUT DONT

this is dereks pov btw

"Hey." I say calmly while jogging to catch up with her. "Hi." She says softly. I look over to her and take in how beautiful she looks. The way her eyes sparkle in the moonlight, her sweater hugging her waist so perfectly, her gorgeous blonde hair flowing down to the midway of her back. My eyes make there way back to her face. I feel my hand start to tingle, resisting the urge to reach and take her hand in mine. She starts walking a little faster feeling uncomfortable with the awkward tension that's between us.

"Meredith, Wait!" I yell wanting to feel her presence next to me. She stops and stands there. I jog up to her, while trying to catch my breath from running.

I run in front of her , "Can we talk? Please?" I say softly, trying to find her eyes. "I- sure." She says nervously while trying to avoid my eyes. I smile softly at her, she returns the gesture. I take her hand in mine. Sparks. I gasp lightly, feeling the shocks run through me at the feeling of her holding my hand. We start walking into the hospital while my mind starts to travel to the things i want to do to her. I brush it off and tighten my grip on her hand, while walking her to an On Call room.

Once we step in my mind goes back to all of the things we did in here. The sneaking around. I smile at the memories and look at her. I stare at her beautiful face shining in the moonlight, from the window next to the top bunk. She looks around for a few minutes before her gaze stops on my figure. She sighs deeply before saying "You wanted to talk. So talk." I don't say anything as i walk towards her slim figure, until were inches apart. I take in her lavender scent being mesmerized by it. I look down meeting her gaze. She looks so innocent from here. I don't say anything, but  lean towards her lips. She backs up looking shocked at my actions. "What are you doing Derek?" she asked unsure of what was happening right now. I pull back and sigh before saying "I'm sorry. I want to talk." She smiles softly at me while nodding. She grabs my hand and drags me onto the bottom bunk.

              I sit down and take a deep breath before starting "Ok, so here it is. I can't stop thinking about you. Every second of every day, the only thing on my mind is you, and believe me i have tried to keep you off of my mind but i can't seem to stop. I know it's wrong trust me, i know i have a wife, But i can't think about her when you take up my whole mind. Let's use today for example, the second i saw you walk through the doors of this hospital, all i could think about was me tearing your clothes off in this on call room, and giving you the pleasure you deserve. All i could think about was the taste of lavender on your lips. You wanna know what i'm thinking about right now? New ways to pleasure the absolute fuck out of you. The taste of your cum, in my mouth. Your warm lips wrapped around my cock. All i can think about is you."

She sits there looking absolutely stunned by my words, her mouth hanging slightly open from shock. She finally comes back and clears her throat trying to ease the awkwardness. I look at her mesmerized by her beauty and say "I need you." She looks back at me before saying "Your married." I look down at the floor and mumble back an "I know." She walks over to where i am and lifts my chin up with her finger "You don't need me." I finally look back at her and say "Yes i do. I need you." She looks down and now it was my turn to lift her chin up with my finger. "Do you need me too." She sighs before looking straight at me with those gorgeous green eyes that send sparks through my body. She says "I need you too."

Before the words leave her mouth my lips are already attached to hers. She immediately responds by kissing me back with less force than i used. I let my hands make there way to the hem of her shirt, while my hands fumble to take it off. Once i get the not out she lifts her arms up breaking the kiss for a quick second for me to take her shirt off. She breathes heavily while i tear her once nice shirt off of her body, then going right back to her lips. While she starts to fumble with my shirt, she stops and pulls back with her face full of guilt. She looks up at me with tears in her eyes and says "We need to stop, this is wrong your married." she fully pulls away starts packing her stuff up while i follow her around and say "Meredith i don't love her. I love you." She freezes and turns around. "What did you just say." I look back at her with a small smile. "I. Love. You." i say taking a step towards her with every word. She shakes her head and continue packing while i sigh. "You don't really love me your just saying that." I look at her and say "Meredith i love you. I really do." she stands there still trying to process it. I sigh and say "No matter what you choose i'm divorcing Addison tomorrow." She nods and starts to walk to the door, but is blocked by me running to the front and blocking her from leaving. "Derek move." She says avoiding my eyes. I lift her chin up with my finger and say " I need you. Now." She tries to get away but i grab her arm and bring her back in.