Crave 《Ashton Irwin》

Pain -1

A/N: okay guys so I'm writing this story on my phone and IDK how to put the cast on here so I'm just put there names here :)
Laken Charleston: Sommer Ray (picture above)
Ashton Irwin: Ashton Irwin
Aaron Smith: Dave Franco
Kirsten Luevark: Corrina Kopf

What was the point in life? One minute there was someone you knew and a minute later they're gone. Sometimes, when you loose them your mind goes out of control and world spins faster and faster and until your kind becomes dizzy and fogged with the memories you've had with them. The little memories tear you apart and it's almost as if God had meant to put you through hell, but there's always the good that's received.

Life felt like a never ending mountain. There's the straight paths and the bumpy paths that are hard to get over. Well, that's how I felt, I'm stuck on a huge cliff.
I thought all of that over at my brothers funeral. How mental I've become since he left. Important people will come and go in your life, but this is my brother. He's suppose to the one who's always my friend and has my back no matter what. I was stuck in this world with mom and dad. None of us could function a word for a whole week until I finally spoke.

His whole class showed up in different shades of grey or black. "The sad colors" I could them. Here I was standing in a red dress, but I know he wanted me to do that. John's favorite color was red and it didn't remind me of the pain and sorrow as much. I could barely keep a smile the whole day as relatives, close friends, and classmates came and gave me apologies and courage. The courage talk certainly didn't work but I appreciated how they tried to cheer me up, even though I would've been better off not having anyone talk to me. I didn't want to be reminded of John.

I drove in my own car so I could have some time alone. My brain couldn't function and my hands shook as I grabbed the wheel. Tears rushed out of my eyes and I soon stopped before I caused a wreck. I couldn't hold myself back this time. I tried to be a big person, but I only became weaker.

I slowly opened the car door, letting the cool September air blow against my skin. I closed my eyes and stepped out of the car, wanting to scream at God for taking John away. I stare at the sky, wondering what he's doing right now. Is he looking down at me? Is he even in Heaven?

I let the last of my tears slip from my eyes. No one could replace my brother. I pull my hair, sitting down. I hug my knees, not knowing what to do. The pain in my heart grew bigger and bigger until I couldn't take it. The pain hurt. I laid on the grass, thoughts still coming and passing through my mind until I found myself into a deep sleep.

This is how my life would be... Completely insane, but something tells me there's always good after the bad.