Love is Dangerous

5. Newcastle (Part II)

But it was just a little fault compared to a multitude of virtues, right?

That was what she used to say to herself when they were together, and repeated it once again while she was wandering around his house without a specific reason. She was happy to be there, even though she had to break a window to enter and, also, even if that "little housebreaking" could have really damaged her career as a cop.

She had no right to be in that place but, luckily, no one was there to see her, or to judge her.
However, she was still risking so much... and for what? She didn't know...

She just remembered that, when she was walking in the streets of Newcastle, she felt so sad, so hopeless, but when she saw his house all her feelings changed in one second; probably she just wanted to "relive her past", like Lydia would say.

At that moment Charlotte was still in his bedroom, so decided to sit on his bed and try to relax a little, if possible. She was very tired and, like she was used to do before sleeping, she started to think about her past, to imagine the days when everything was okay, to almost live in her own memories.

She closed her eyes and she was there again, in that same house, two years before, with Daniel sitting next to her. Although she wasn't able to remember the specific date, all the words they said that day were stuck in her mind, they were impossible to forget.

- So... - he started to talk – I know you're getting a promotion. –
- Yes...I hope so – Charlotte answered, smiling.

Some days before she had arrested one of the main criminals of the town, everyone talked about that and her boss, probably, was trying to find the right way to reward her. A promotion was likely to happen, but nothing was official yet so she didn't want to talk about it with anyone, not even with Daniel... But, someway, he had already found out everything by himself. As usual.

- How do you know it? – she asked some minutes later, after an awkward silence.
- Was it a secret? – asked again Daniel, with a weird smile on his face. He seemed...jealous, and not happy for her.
- No but... -
- But you are too humble to talk about it...I see... - he suggested, but didn't look sincere at all.
- It doesn't mean that you won't get a promotion as well, in the future. You deserve it – she tried to comfort him, if possible.
- It's not so easy – he sighed - you deserve it more. –
- And so, what are you talking about? – she tried to laugh, to make that situation less complicated, less heavy – Are you saying you could be happier with a promotion, but without me? – Charlotte asked again, in a funny way. It was just a joke but Daniel's silence seemed so dark and worrying.

Finally, after many seconds, too many seconds, he answered.

- Don't even think something like that – he smiled, and looked more relaxed... He looked like the real Daniel again.
Charlotte started to feel a little better as well, so she had the possibility to look around herself in that "dream".

And it was weird and almost funny to think that this memory, like almost the previous one about Daniel, was similar to a painting. Every detail was clear, and well "drawn" but the general atmosphere was more unrealistic and the entire scene seemed almost "set underwater" because a deep blue light was colouring the entire place. It was like night.

Her skin was still pink and her hair was still brown, but that "blue shade" was everywhere near them and Daniel's green eyes, in that atmosphere, were shining even more than usual. They were beautiful, but scary at the same time...and so all his words seemed to have a new, darker meaning.

Who was the real Daniel? She thought suddenly, leaving her memory.

The boy who loved her (maybe) or the boy that wanted to be more powerful, to be richer, more important...and to steal her job?
She couldn't even think about that possibility but, at that moment, she had the weird idea that maybe he was just using her. She understood that there was so much more about Daniel...and that, maybe, she didn't know him so well.

Was he lying during that conversation? No...not probably, but he was not even telling the complete truth.

She thought again about their past years together and remembered that there was a place in that house where she never had the possibility to enter. His office.
It was a private room and Charlotte never wanted to disappoint him by entering there, but now that he was gone...she felt it was her right to really understand what he was planning in that place. Maybe she could have even understood who killed him and why.

She almost immediately found the door she was looking for, but it was locked.
She had to push the door, try to break the padlock...nothing seemed to work.

So, she knew what to do; Daniel had a gun in his house, a secret one and, after a while, she was able to find it. She came back to the door and, without thinking twice, she shot the lock; maybe it wasn't the right idea, but her desire to know more about the "love of her life" was too strong to resist.

She could finally enter the room. And what she found there was really interesting.
That place was huge, and a big desk was standing exactly in the middle of the office; Daniel's notes and maps were all still there.

They were full of names, of pictures, included the ones of her police office. Her photo as well.
It was clear, then, that he didn't really trust anyone.

Their love was a lie... And Charlotte almost started to cry. The last 5 years of her life changed meaning and she finally understood that the pain and the sadness she suffered after his death...were...not real. Fake. Fake like the life Daniel was living.

Maybe, she was a little too severe with him at that moment but she was feeling so angry that, if Daniel hadn't been dead already, she would have desired to kill him personally.

And she almost wanted to scream when, by reading some of his personal notes, she started to understand what really happened to him the night he died.

It wasn't all clear, but lots of the events of that night were almost already settled: the place of the murder, the exact time, even lots of other details were all already written in those notes. It was like someone had decided the place and the exact moment of his death.

But it was impossible...right? 
Also, it was weird to think that, after Daniel's death and the following investigation lead by the local police, no one had ever talked about his office and the scary notes that she was now holding in her hands.

She looked for some other evidence of that weird revelation and she found out more recent documents about events that happened only after Daniel's death; some of them were about new criminals and thieves, who were starting to work in some areas of the town.

Both the personal notes and the other documents were printed, without any information about the possible author.

And the last one, a local newspaper, was dated only a few weeks ago.
- What? – she whispered, when she started to think that that house, after all, was not a safe place anymore.
However, there was a last thing she had to check before leaving, a huge blackboard on the wall.

She thought to find more information there, but what she read terribly scared her.
Her name, her entire name was written there over and over, and over again, exactly like the writings on the wall in Bath, on the building that caught fire.
That was enough.

Another girl could have started to cry, to scream or simply to lose her mind in that situation, but Charlotte was a cop and, thanks to the abilities she had learned in years, she was able to know what to do.

She grabbed the notes and the documents, all the ones she could hide under her jacket and in her jeans and then immediately left the room. Trying to be as silent as possible, she came back to the broken window and escaped, never looking back.

She started to run only when she was already far away from the house, and so she ran, ran, ran as fast as possible, until she felt safe...a little safer than before, at least.
Then, she stopped walking and even decided to let herself fall on the ground, trembling in the middle of nothing.

It was almost night at that moment, and no one was close to her.
That loneliness gave her the possibility to cry, and she did it.

She cried so much, like never before.