More Than Words

The kids aren't alright

It was starting wear on you, having Jim stuck in the darklands while the other kids ran around and tried to figure out how to save him, throwing themselves into danger left and right. You didn't care what your mind was telling you; you couldn't help but worry because fuck, you cared about these kids! They cracked you up, sang stupid songs with you, made your day every time they walked in. And you had to sit by, watching them worry themselves to pieces as their best friend, YOUR friend, was stuck in the darklands. You hadn't told anyone this, but your hair was starting to thin from your excessive stress, the bandages on both of your thumbs evidence to your dangerous amount of nail biting. Neither Claire nor Toby seemed to be able to tell, and you were thankful for that. You couldn't add that to their list of stresses. 

No one in your life seemed to notice, actually. The simultaneous relief and bitter ache in your chest was a struggle to live with, but you were managing. Don't worry the kids, hide your pain behind a smile for Douxie, and move on. That's all you had to do.

...and you were failing at it. Miserably. Your hands were shaking constantly as you restocked your shelves. You'd already accidentally dropped two mugs trying to hand them to customers. Douxie had already pointed out the growing bags under your eyes, one too many nights spent lying awake, staring at the ceiling and worrying, for your body to healthily handle. Your lips chapped constantly, several small splits in them constantly hidden behind layers of lipgloss and lipbalm in hopes of speeding up the healing process. It was probably why Douxie was starting to make a habit of staring at your lips and studying your eyes; you had to admit, you did not look like you were doing well, even to your own mind as you studied yourself in the mirror. 

Well, it didn't matter anyway. You had more important things to worry about than the rings steadily getting darker under your eyes. Like making sure your hand was steady as you handed Eli his tea, watching as he happily drank it down. He was currently going on about the latest sci-fi book you'd sold him, but the words kept fading in and out of focus in your head, blending together as you blankly smiled and nodded along to what he was saying. He was too wrapped in in what he was saying to notice you could barely even focus on your hands resting on the counter in front of you, let alone the plot of a book you'd sold him a week ago. Your vision blurred as the world suddenly tilted around you, your mind vaguely processing that it wasn't the world that was tipping over, but you, before your vision went black and the world around you disappeared. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When your eyes blinked open, you were staring at the ceiling of a hospital, an orange haired woman standing next to your with a worried frown on her face. When she finally noticed you were awake, she gave you a warm smile. 

"Well good morning, Miss (l/n)," the doctor greeted you. You groaned and tried to sit up, before the woman tutted and pushed you back against the admittedly comfortable pillows. "You need to rest, Miss (l/n)-"

"(Y/n)," you corrected tiredly and the woman's smile broadened by a fraction.

"(Y/n)," the woman corrected gently. You smiled tiredly at her.

"Thank you," you mumbled, yawning. Man, you were tired. Your bones felt like lead, sinking into the bed with the weight of the sky pressing against you. "What happened?" 

"You passed out and bumped your head," the woman explained, brushing a strand of hair out of your eyes. You hummed a soft, grateful note. 

"...did Eli see me?" you asked softly. The woman nodded.

"He was the one who called," the woman explained and you groaned, reaching a hand up and rubbing it against your forehead. Great. Just great. "Is something wrong?"