Maniac

2. The Hungover

Ethan

I miss her so much. I can't believe that. I can't believe that I went to her house late at night. It was obvious she was sleeping.

I'm hungover. My head is annoying me. Every little, tiny noise is like a bomb. I feel nauseous.

I don't remember all the conversation we had, but I do remember some of her phrases. It felt like a knife in my spine.

     "Why people like you always want back what they can't have?". She said, but by the sound of her voice I could tell that she was sad, broken. "But I'm past that, Ethan".

That hurted.

That means that we are over over. I don't wanna be over like forever. I just want her to explain why she cheated. I can forgive her. But I need an explanation.

Although she said she did not cheat. Jack said that he saw her at the cinema with Dylan, some hot soccer guy.

I don't know why she would lie to me. If Jack saw her... why would Jack lie to me either?

I don't know who to believe. And now it's not the time to thing about it. My head is a mess, I feel sick, and I need a shower.

     "Son, your friend Jack is here. He is waiting in the living room". Say my father as I'm getting dressed after my cold shower.

Anyway, after the shower I felt like a new me, I feel so fresh. My head's still hurting, but I can manage it.

I'm under control again.

     "Hey, bro". Says Jack. He definitely does not seem like he's going through a hungover at all. "We're meeting Cole in an hour".

I don't feel like hanging up with anyone. Last night with Aria was so hard. I don't know if she is still mad, I just wanna see her. Talk to her.

I know it will be an explanation for all of this.

     "Did the psycho reply?". Says Jacks, trying not to laugh. He thinks it's so funny. But it hurts.

He does not know that I came over to her house. I can't tell him that.

     "Nah, she left me on read".

I'm not lying tho. I'm just omitting some part of the story.

     "She's crazy".

     "Yeah, she drives me mad". I say, while holding my head, that is hurting like hell again.

     "Man, take something for the headache".

I do that. If I take a pill and in some minutes I will be better.

     "I'm never drinking again".

     "Sure, me neither". Jack laughs. He always laughs. But this time I laugh too, it is obvious that we are going to drink again.

It's summer. Free time means party. Party means alcohol and good music.

     "Cole is on his way". Says Jack looking at his phone. "Bring me some food, please".

He can't be serious. But I got up off the sofa.

     "Take it". I throw him an apple. He caches on air. And I am now making coffee.

A few minutes later Cole is on my couch.

     "Yesterday was...". Cole starts.

     "Amazing, I know. Today we can go to the bar near our high school". Neither Cole or I were thinking in that response.

     "I don't feel like going out tonight, sorry". But as soon as I say that Jack killed me with his eyes. For him, not going out with him because you don't want to, it is like saying you hate him. Like he is nothing to you. "Man, don't look at me like that. Anyway, I had plans".

     "With whom?". He looks mad, he is expecting the name of someone.

     "Family plans, you know". Totally a lie. My parents are packing their stuff because they have a trip. Business. So I have my home all by myself.

     "Boring".

     "Yeah". Cole says.

After that I asked them to leave. I just wanted the day for me. To think and relax.

At 3PM I go to the airport to say goodbye to my parents. I'm gonna miss them, but I need some time for myself.

It's been a week since I broke up with Aria. And I miss her so much.

There must be an explanation. I need it.

I miss her lips, how they used to kiss me on my cheek, on my nose, on my forehead, on my lips. I miss her hands; I miss holding hands with her. I miss everything about her. I miss even her face when he used to get angry.

Sometimes I feel like it was my fault. That I did not treat her the right way.

I know I was the one who ended things. But anyway, I miss her.

Lately, I've been thinking about it, and I think I will never be able to love another person as much as I love Aria.

She is the one.

I need to talk to her, I need to tell her all these things.

I call her, but she doesn't pick up the phone. So, I call again.

     "What?". She answers. She's mad. Doesn't surprise me, to be honest.

     "I need to talk to you". But she does not say a word, making me more nervous. "I'm serious, Aria, I need to tell you something".

     "I don't know if I wanna hear it, to be honest".

     "I'm sure you want to". I bet she is going to love me even more if she sees that I forgive her, that I still love her. "I want you back".

     "You have to be kidding".

     "But I'm not". I hear through the phone that she just sighed. "I forgive you, Aria".

     "So, you're still thinking that I cheated, didn't you?". She sounds either mad or sad.

     "Someone saw you. Why don't you accept it? I'm telling you it does not matter, that I still love you".

     "This is not about me cheating, this is you being an idiot".

     "What's wrong with you?".

     "You don't trust me". She is disappointed, I can tell it because her tone went down.

     "This is unfair".

     "You think? Let me get this straight. You're calling to tell me that you forgive me but that you can't trust me. What's the point of this call?".

     "Getting back together". She sighs again.

     "I don't think it's the best idea, Ethan".

     "But you still love me too".

     "So? It's not worth all the pain". She's lying. I don't buy this. At all.

     "Excuses, I bet that you are fucking that soccer guy".

     "You maniac". And she hangs up. Ending our conversation.

I didn't mean it. I know she is not with someone new. I know she loves me. I was just hurt because of her rejection.

I'm just hurted, that's why I said that.

I love her.

___________

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