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"And you just have to write a poem about your favorite hero in the style of Edgar Allan Poe to finish up today's English homework. I'm so glad I didn't pick Poe as my favorite American poet, his poems are dark and I could never write about Fatgum like that," Korei rambled, unaware of just how adorable she was when she was tutoring Shinsou. He felt slightly jealous knowing that she spent more time with other people like this, so effortlessly attractive. He wondered who else sat and overthought every word they wanted to say to her because it simply wasn't good enough. Is there anyone else out there who compares her eyes to honey when the light hits them just the right way? Is there anyone else out there who sees Korei as a goddess under the convenience store fluorescent lights? Is there anybody else out there who's fallen so far in love with her that they nearly have a heart attack whenever she smiles at them? Is there...and...will they treat her better? "Hoshi? Are you listening?"
He blinked back to reality, quietly apologizing for spacing out while staring at her. Korei only smiled and leaned over to kiss him gently. She went right back into her little lecture about his homework, re-explaining everything he needed to know. The purple-haired boy felt like he was staring at his future...and that frightened him. After hurting her so much, he knew that if he stayed with her he'd just get worse. Now, he didn't want to break up with her. She just...she deserved better. He needed to fix himself so that he didn't treat her like she was dirt...and he knew that meant letting her go.
"Korei," he began but the sweet girl cut him off as she started cleaning up the mess of notebooks and papers on the bed.
"I know, Hoshi, I know. I'm cleaning it up so we can cuddle and watch that movie. You should probably let me clean your ears first, just in case I fall asleep," she talked, tying her hair up in a bun. She had no clue that Shinsou was planning on breaking up with her, thinking that they had been going really well these past few weeks. No arguments, no rough grabbing unless asked for, it was all good.
"I..." he sighed, unable to do what he knew he needed to. Did that make him weak? Was he a coward for not being able to break up with the girl that he's become dependent on? It was for her own good! But he just wanted to curl up into a ball with her and disappear from reality. No worries, no cares, just the two of them off in their own little world. It'd be a dream. "Okay. I'll get yours too while we're at it." He wanted to be selfish and enjoy their time together some more. Maybe he could get better without losing her?
— fluoxetine —
"All done, kitten," Shinsou hummed as he brushed his fingers through her hair. Korei thanked him, sitting up and talking about how much better it felt to have clean ears. He wanted to tell her that they weren't that dirty, to begin with, but he didn't really have the energy for that.
