unseen tattoo | kokonoi hajime

11

i've done everything, tried everything, for her to notice my feelings for her and for her to love me back. why did it have to be kokonoi, why not me? what was something that he had and I didn't? I sure do hope you could tell me (y/n), though I think you won't be able to now.

I apologize for the things I'll do, it's needed. haven't I made my feelings clear for you? I treated you better than your other co-workers, I've offered to help you with your work, I've bought you food, I've given you less tasks, I've given you more pay—

I did everything for you to notice, were you already occupied at that time or were you just really oblivious? either way, I still can't accept this. how could you replace me? is this how you really are? didn't you love me even one bit?

that smile of yours, if only I didn't fall for that smile of yours. I wouldn't feel like this right now, seeing you having fun with someone else pains me. why did it have to be him? I could do better, I could treat you better.

seeing you work hard, noticing how focused you are when it comes to work. when your eyebrows slightly furrow when you don't understand something, when your eyes lit up when you finally get a break, to see how bright your smile is. that's what I want to see, if only I was the one recieving that bright smile of yours.

seeing you run at him excitedly, eyes sparkle even more, smile get wider— oh how I wish that was me infront of you instead. was I too late? what went wrong with my plan? why did he suddenly come in the picture? why did he have to ruin everything?

it was going well, she sounded so kind to me, so sincere. yet you suddenly came in, were you there even before I was? if you did, why did I have to meet her later? why make me fall in love with her when she's already in love with someone else?

is this how it is? I wish I could change a lot of things, from start to finish. if only I met her earlier, if only you didn't meet her, if only I created a plan b. it should've gone well, everything could've been perfect if it weren't for you kokonoi.

once I heard about you two being in a relationship, I felt devestated. you made me believe that I had a chance with you by being kind to me, why am I so gullible? what should I do? what should I do? why am I like this? when do I get my enjoyable life?

it always gets ruined, I thought I could escape the bad luck— turns out I was wrong, this is stupid. I actually believed I could get her, of course not. that's impossible, she already got one.

is it weird if I can't forget about you even after knowing you're already in a relationship? I just can't forget about you, its devestating, I wish to forget you yet I can't. isthis something a book can explain? why don't I know about it if it is?

who cares at this point. (y/n), if I can't have you—no one can.

—
I apologize for going hiatus all of a sudden, looks like what I said last chapter was a lie- right after I posted that no more words came to mind to create another chapter.

I'm very sorry for the lack of words in this chapter, I'm still currently in writers block. Our school just started as well so we have some activities to accomplish, I'll try to squeeze some brain juice to finish this story soon💀