My new family / Måneskin fanfic

Chapter 10

When I woke up, I was in my big empty and cold bed. I had no memory of falling asleep there last night. The only thing I remembered from the night was that damn article with my name in first page. Me ?! I had harassed and hit Alberto? And besides, he pretends to be my ex while he's the person I hated the most in the world! I had a growing feeling of hate inside of me. My throat was tied up so much I found it unfair. It's his name that should make the headlines, not mine! 

I felt like the world was against me at this time of my life.

The worst part was that today, tonight more precisely, we had the X Factor finale. This piece of shit had chosen the right moment to tell the reporters anything. I was so scared that this rumor would affect the choice of the jury or the audience. I was so scared, that because of this bullshit, that because of me, my friends would pay the price. That's right, after all, who would want to vote for someone who is accused of being violent towards their "boyfriend"? The answer is : no one...

All day long I felt anxious, I kept turning the rings on my fingers in all directions, biting my nails constantly, biting the inside of my cheek until blood or even have small panic attacks from time to time. My friends tried to reassure me as much as possible, I was so grateful for that by the way. But nothing and no one could do anything anyway. I was afraid of failure, afraid of disappointing my friends, my family, the whole Italy! And even though they didn't tell me anything about it, I could see in my friends' eyes that they were feeling that fear too. Especially since then, me who was making headlines across the whole country.

7 p.m . : The final was so much close. I tried the best I could to de-stress, to think of something else. I even did yoga even if I really hate it. In my head, I had only one goal : to fight. Fight for my friends, so as not to disappoint them. I didn't wanted to fail because that's what he wanted, Alberto. But I wasn't going to give him this pleasure. I was determined...

8 p.m . : The 5 of us were in the boxes. We all talked together, and especially, we reassured each other as best we could. 

But it was time to prepare, it was soon up to us. We dressed in matching clothes, the theme was black and gold. I was wearing a slightly tight black dress with boots with gold glitter laces. I had put on a lot of gold jewelry to complete my outfit. And there, we moved on to makeup. We were installed on hairdressers and makeup artists took care of the rest. The room was very quiet. I think everyone was super stressed and we wanted to concentrate as much as possible for the performance.

Thomas, who was next to me getting makeup leaned up to my ear and whispered to it.

T: Rosa, I would like to talk to you afterwards.

I nodded to let him know that I would come.

After the make-up and the hairstyle, I saw Thomas come out of the dressing room to join the corridor. I decided to follow him. He was sitting on the floor, against the wall. He told me to sit next to him.

T: You know Rosa, I wanted to tell you that I'm so sorry for everything you are going through right now. I mean, your trauma from the past comes back, this guy comes back and throws bullshit on reporters. It's really not fair and we will do everything to make sure he doesn't get out so easily. And Rosa, I know what you are thinking, you think because of that it could affect the number of votes we will have tonight and I'm sure you think it's your fault. But not at all Rosa, even if we don't win tonight, it doesn't matter. We are a group, even a family for me, we advance together, we win together or we fail together. It works like that and know that we will always be there for yo-

Damiano's screaming voice interrupted Thomas' speech.

D : Damn where the 2 others are ! It's soon at us !