Beneath the scars

Chapter 2

I jumped on my bed as I starred at the white ceiling . My eyelids suddenly grew heavy and I drifted off to sleep . "Come here, you are just a little puppet in my hand even an ants life is worth more than yours ." he said . I walked straight to him .I was frightened. He pushed me to the wall and his actions led to my head hitting the wall and as a result got bruised ." Please leave me , let me go , no, don't hit me . " I woke up only to find it a dream with tears flooding my eyes . I got up and left the room .  I walked further to the edge of the building . There were voices in my head telling me continuously to jump and kill myself . There were so many reasons why I needed to kill myself . One , there was no one in my life who would miss me if I died .Two , I was completely broken and feared to be told the truth that I was crazy . Taking in a deep breath I put one foot on the staircase ready to add the other when I heard someone shout "stop ".

I froze for a moment as I watched the woman from yesterday run to me . " What were you going to do ? Do you have any idea how many floors this building has ? Do you want to die?" she questioned . Yes I want to die . I answered truthfully ."Look I don't know what you've been through but I do know that death is not the answer." I've lost everyone ,what's there to live for . I said .

I'm Josy a psychologist. You can come see me whenever you want. I'm only 2 blocks away . Just remember " Place your hand over your heart , Can you feel it ? That is called purpose , You're alive for a reason so, don't ever give up."

After my encounter with Josy I realized that I wasn't ready to die , I just simply don't want to exist because I'm stuck here being miserable while the world is out there waiting for someone who can survive the  cold and warmth . I've decided to be that person . I may not be the same as I was back then but I'm going to fight till I win my battle.

It's been a week since I've seen Josy . These days I've been thinking of how to approach  Josy, how to turn a page further in my story .That is why I'm here in front of Josy's office to turn over to a brand new chapter .

I knocked on the door and waited for her to respond .After a brief moment I heard a come in and so I went forward to open the door.Josy sat there looking me straight in the eye with a smile plastered on her face .That alone gave me the encouragement that I was needed and that I could do it. "Good morning Josy, I have thought of what you said and I'm here to turn a page further in my life." " So ,how has your day been?" she inquired" honestly they have been good". "Would you like to go for a walk ?"she asked. "A walk would be fine".I said

"I'm Josy Richard. I'm single and ready to mingle .I'm thirty years old .I'm from a family of six . I have three elder siblings and I'm the youngest .Your turn Riley" I'm Riley Essah ,I'm twenty years old . I'm from a family of four and I'm the youngest . Actually I'm adopted . "Would it be ok if I asked you about your biological parents ?" Sure it's fine Josy we're friends now and friends always share ."

We were a family of four ,my mom ,dad,my brother and I . My dad was a drunkard who always had bills to pay but even still we were happy. I was quite young then but I remember my dad running away from home because the police were after him .After that day we heard nothing more of him.

"It's getting to lunch time why not go back in ,have lunch and we will continue tomorrow." Josy said ."Sure". I went back inside sat with my mates and took my meal after which I went back to my room . I wish I could turn back time maybe I would have applied the wisdom mom gave me ,not to open a door without peeping to see who was there . Josy seems nice I hope I made the right decision and I hope I don't regret it .