Beneath the scars

Epilogue

I remember their first steps , theirs first words their elementary school days , middle school , junior high school , senior high school , college and now . I remember their sixteenth birthday gift , the letter I wrote . I really hope they understood every word written and I hope they always remember it like I do cause it would send them far in life . I remember writing "Life isn't fair. Sweet girls, I love you so, but life sure does have curve balls. Just remember momma said there'd be days like this. If I could keep you little forever, I'd bottle you up and hold your heart so that nobody could hurt it. If I teach you anything, I want you to learn how to have mental toughness and grit. Overwhelming feelings may come, but know that they will also leave. And I'm here for you every step of the way.
People aren't always going to like you. Oh, if I had a penny for every time I heard this... I'd be a wealthy woman! To tell you the truth, girls, I've always struggled with this. Until I became a mother, I didn't realize how silly it is to care that much about what other people think. Just know that people aren't always going to like you. If you did something to harm them, please apologize. However, sometimes there's nothing you can say or do.
Your mother is here to help you. The day I dread most is when you two decide you don't need me anymore. I had this realization the other day, actually, when you didn't want my help putting on your shoes. I know there are many things you can do on your own. But know this — I am here. I will always be.
God gave you each other for a reason. Have each other's backs please. You're family. I already have the realization (I have a lot of those, by the way) that you probably won't both want to do the same activity or sport. And that's fine. But if you do- -please love each other through the mistakes. I mean, what if you both decide to try out for the soccer team? What if one of you makes it and one of you doesn't? Ugh. It's almost too much for me to bear thinking about. I pray that you always feel for each other, though. Because sometimes it may seem that all you have is each other. Be on the same team.
Make memories with each other. You don't have to be alike. People will sometimes think you're the same because you're twins. Take that and run with it. Make memories with each other–however similar or different you are! You are so uniquely made.
Stay humble. Stay kind. In a world full of news that is almost too much to bear sometimes, know that you've been given gifts to share with the world. Your gifts are meant to share, yes, but also know that those gifts can be taken away easily. Be humble if people praise your gifts. Stay kind no matter what. Being able to do these things, themselves, are gifts. Remember, you never know when someone needs your smile or your words or your kind act of service or your hug.
Social Media is only the perception of what others want you to see. Girlfriends, don't get it twisted. I'm not even certain what social media will look like when you're 49 and want to get on Facebook or Instagram or Twitter. HA! Just kidding. You wont' be 49, you'll be 50! But seriously. The things you see on there are merely perceptions. It's a highlight reel of people's lives. It's often times not reality. I pray you have the discernment to see that when that time {gulp} comes around.
Words do 1 of 2 things: give life OR give death. I mentioned having gifts before. You will discover what those are. But what I want you to know about words is this: words can hurt and cut very deep. Words can't be taken back–and often words are what scar people so deeply. Be careful with your words. I'm not a pro at this, by the way. There are many things I've said and done that I'm not proud of. And when and if this happens, apologize if you can. Most importantly, forgive yourself and move on. A life spent looking backwards misses all the beauty that lies in front of it.
Your parents aren't perfect. You might have realize this. But you're pretty darn smart. So, like I said before, we have to forgive ourselves or the coulda, woulda, shoulda, fear and anxiety will creep into a crack of our weaknesses, and overcome us. Please know we're not perfect, and we will never claim to be. Our personal journeys have stories to tell. THAT'S for sure. When it comes time for stories, though, talk to me first... because chances are your father's are going to be inappropriate. HA!
You only get one life. Follow your dreams. NEVER APOLOGIZE for setting a goal and coming up with a plan to achieve it. I will help you. I promise. If I've learned anything in life, it's that we only get one. Life is short. And no matter how hard you try to soak in each day, today is the only day that's promised. Yesterday is for memories and learning. And tomorrow is never promised. Don't live in fear, sweet girls. Fear is a liar that will steal your joy. So live each day with love for others, love for yourself, and faith in something bigger than yourself.
Dream big, daughters of mine. Momma loves you." I look around me now with a proud look on my face . Looking at my grown up 19 year old kids together with me preparing a cake for their fathers birthday. The years have passed on soo soon and so have the kids . I miss their youthful days . I miss them running around , fighting with one another. Asking who is older and who is younger . Time flew by too soon . I heard the door bell ring as we placed the cake on the arranged table and turned off the lights. Vivian went ahead and opened the door as I heard Henry and her exchange greetings . As soon as he stepped nearer to the table we flickered the light on as we began singing the happy birthday song we had made up for him and led him to the dinning table. " Happy birthday love ." I said . We blew the candle and cut the cake after which the twins insisted we dance to celebrate. We heard thinking out loud blast through the speakers as we held hands, forgetting the twins being there , looking into each other's eyes and dancing with the rhythm.
"Thinking Out Loud"