Beneath the scars

Chapter 31

Some memories are hard to let go of like to one that keeps repeating in my head , memories of when my two most precious jewels were given life . I quite remember , I stood at the balcony of our home watching the stars in the mid night sky . Sleep was far from me with the thoughts on my mind . I wondered if I would be a good mother . If I would be able to give the love my twins needed to them. I was scared . Scared that I won't be what they needed . Being in my last week of pregnancy I had become an emotional wreck. I placed my hand on my bloated tummy feeling some contractions. I felt a hand on my shoulders and I turned and melted in his embrace . Henry had always being there for me even at times I feared I won't be a good mother . He was my strength so far . Throughout these nine months he had tolerated my mood swings without a single complaint . Even at night time when I craved strange things he found ways and means to get it for me. He even stocked the freezer with lots of strawberry yogurt just because I mostly craved for it at night . Honestly , if I was asked to choose a partner again I would choose him a zillion times . I looked up into his sleepy eyes as he asked me why I wasn't in bed at this time. He didn't even wait for my reply before walking me to bed and laying beside me . I felt another contraction the pain slightly intense . I tapped Henry slightly as he sprang up asking what's wrong . I felt water slid down my leg and I screamed for Henry to grab the baby bags as my water broke. I watched the confused looking guy rush out to the back of the door to grab the baby bags as he came back near me and carried me into the car .In his confusion he forgot to take his car keys and rushed to go and bring it . Throughout the ride to the hospital Henry kept reminding me to take deep breaths . After ten minutes we arrived at the hospital and I was whisked immediately to the labour room . "Relax your legs!" "Grab your legs behind your knees!" "Bear down while holding your breath!" "Okay good, but this time hold your breath!" "Let your legs relax!" It was the same set of instructions they kept repeating , but caught in the moment it was just too much to process. Next time perhaps I will repeat these to myself in the days leading up to labor! . After the first or second pushing session they said they could see the top of her head, and I felt it. The doctor told me that I could probably have the baby in the next one push or two.I saw the tears and anxiety in Henry's eyes as he watched me . I could tell he was scared since one out of two ladies die during labour , I knew I had to give my all for him and my twins ."She's coming out!" They said."I know, I can feel her. I know." I knew when she had left my body, and I strained for a look. It was 7:44, less than half an hour since we arrived at the hospital. She wasn't crying, and it seemed like ages before they passed her up to me. I'm sure it wasn't that long, though cause she was later passed to the nurses as I repeated my actions . " It's another girl ." They said . The doctor waited for the cord to stop pulsing before she cut it, and a nurse was wiping their faces or something, I think. I was patient, and then next thing I knew I had them. They were so precious and perfect, and I was so happy I'd gone through all this . " Who would have thought one day I would be the midwife of doctor Riley it really is an honour ." The younger nurse said. I laughed at that as I felt Henry stroke my hair . I felt like holding my babies , so I did. I held lily close to my chest as the nurse guided Henry on how to hold Vivian.Eventually they took them to the other side of the room for evaluation, and Henry went with them . I just laid back and rested . I knew the rest could be handled by Henry . I was taken out of the labour room and placed in a ward room . My mom , brother, Josy and so many other relatives came over to visit me and my new bundle of joy . I saw Henry holding Lily as he passed me a smile with pride in his eyes . I saw love and so many other emotions swim in his eyes . He is the reason for all this . He is the reason I feel so complete. It's safe to say he is my own heaven, my happy place. "Congratulations" Josy said as she came closer to me . "Any names yet ? " My brother asked . I would like to introduce you to Lily Smith and Vivian Smith . I said . " Lily and Vivian it is , I love it ." Mom said . Dad walked over to Josy who was holding Vivian and said , "welcome Lily and Vivian you are going to be so loved ." Everyone left after a few minutes and I was left with Henry. He pleaded with me to take rest and thanked me for making him the happiest man alive but what he didn't know is he made me the happiest woman alive . I was discharged later on in the evening all I needed to do was to come back in a few days to check the girls and ensure they are okay . My eyes opened to the sound of kids crying. " Bloody murder." Henry muttered. Henry rolled off his back. " I think they are hungry ." He said and I nodded . Having not slept enough these past few days and staying awake throughout the night was really taking a troll on me . Henry picked Lily up and moved her gently from side to side while I took Vivian . It took less than a minute for lily to go quiet again while Vivian was still crying. They were really going to be daddy's girls . I tilted my head to Henry as I didn't know what to do . I felt like I was not a good mother for them but this is my first time being a mom there are certain things I'm not use to. " Does it mean they are not hungry ?" I asked Henry . Henry shook his head " How am I supposed to know ? " He whispered. You're their father." I simply said." And you are their mother." he retorted. " I'm not good with the baby thing, I'm now learning." I said with my head hung low . Henry smiled and said " Go and rest, hun. I'll make sure she's okay and with that he put Lily back in bed and took Vivian. I went back to bed as Henry walked out of the bedroom with Vivian . Even after being told to sleep I could not sleep . I kept on tossing and turning . Today was the day set for their naming ceremony . I just couldn't wait . I helped them arrange the gold coloured balloons as I watched time flew and the program begin . Lilly and Vivian were dressed in white attaires that looked so cute on them . In all honesty I was glad to have them .