Beneath the scars

Chapter 28

Early this morning Josy messaged me the address to her husband's cafe . She spoke of how she wanted to hear everything that had happened in the past six years and also she wanted me to meet her husband Edward since I couldn't make it to their wedding two years ago . I walked to a flower shop and bought a bouquet of red roses for Josy . When I finally came out of the shop I picked a taxi and headed for cafe Rosa . When I arrived I texted Josy to tell her I have arrived that was when I spotted Josy with her seven months old pregnant self approach me .  " Josy , oh my goodness I missed you so much these are for you ." I said . " No need to be so formal come here , meet my husband Edward." She said . " Nice to meet you Mr. Edward Jones ." I said  . Josy took me to the far end of the cafe served me a cup of coffee and a plate of cookies and began talking . She told me that the man she met at prison had been released and that with the help of father Augustine he had gotten in contact with her . She told me that he was in search of his daughter and they were ment to meet in two days time to disclose information that would be needed to find his daughter . After two hours of constant talking and making up for the lost time I decided to leave Josy to rest. While walking home I saw the church building opened and walked right through the gate . If there was still one person I had to thank then that would be father Augustine he helped me when I thought that the world was against me . When I got into the church room I listened to what he was preaching about which was something at the moment I needed to know . He was preaching about the act to let go .He said "Our past struggles can weigh heavily on our shoulders. When we refuse to let go of the past, it holds us back and prevents us from living in the moment. And from being who we really want to be.
According to Eckhart Tolle, people create and maintain problems because they give them a sense of identity.
Is it the fear of losing this identity that makes us hold onto a painful past for too long and prevents us from living in the present moment? Are we so attached to our struggles, because we don’t know how we would be without them? We spend too much of our precious time dwelling on the past. “I wish I could just erase that mistake.” “Why did that happen to me?” “I wish I’d made my own choices earlier.” But guess what the past can not be changed but we can look forward and try to improve on the future .Your past has shaped you into the special and unique individual that you are today. Realizing this is a great first step to appreciating and embracing your own story. Nobody is perfect and we all carry a past with us. As the bible says in Isaiah 43:18 -19  “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!...." and in  Philippians 3:12; "but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead. I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” and also as Ephesians 4:31-32 say; "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." Let us put the past behind us and forgive those who wronged is for forgiveness is the only way to move forward and by forgiving others the Lord too shall forgive you of your sins as said in  Matthew 6:15; "But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." 
I dwelled over the words the Catholic father had said and in this short moment he had managed to solve one of my problems within a short while . He had managed to help me understand the value of letting go and forgiving others and at this moment I was more than ready to meet my father . I wanted to forgive him for everything I held him responsible for , I wanted to free him of his guilt  . I wanted to let him know how I also feel and  how happy I am that he did not abandon is but he left for our safety .