The Fault In Reality

Chapter Ten

"Come on, Annie, let's go," says Chase.

His voice is the only sound in the ptherwise silent air. Even the birds have stopped their song long enough to watch my outburst. My face flushes and I jam my teeth together, trying to keep my scoldings to myself. There's no point in telling them off.

Annie is still rooted in her position in front of Devany.

"I don't understand," she says. "What's wrong with this horse?"

Later, in retrospect, I promise myself I tried to swallow my anger. But the words still came.

"Are you blind?" I demanded. "Can't you see how scared he is? He's not for riding, and if you listened to what people were telling you instead of walking all over them..!"

I admit I was mean. But I swear I hadn't meant to make her cry.

Now I'm sitting in my room, seething after being scolded by my father. The image of him pacing the kitchen, tossing me the occasional furtive glance that read, is this girl really my daughter? is imprinted in my mind.

And now I'm condemned to a day in the house. There's no doubt in my mind I'll be expected to help with dinner, and all the while the cheerful voices of Chase and Annie drift in through the window. At least, I console myself, Devany is safe. In the end Annie tacked up the silver Arabian, and with Chase astride a stocky bay, they set out on their trail ride.

I study my reflection in the glass. Who am I? This sad girl, with an angry turn in her lips and forever narrowed eyes, well... she's nothing like the person who used to gallop Eclipse bareback in the field. For a while I felt almost better. Now the truth hits me like a sore weight. Nothing has changed. My father still chose to go marry some other woman, almost definitely because of me. Just because they're willing to play Happy Family for the summer doesn't mean I'm accepted in any way. As for my mother -well! She's more than happy to be rid of me, even for just two months.

I'm so busy feeling sorry for myself and staring at my reflection in the glass, that I almost don't notice my father approaching the barn. My heart skips a beat. Beside him is an all-too-familiar man. I shake my head for a moment, as though trying to deny the reality in front of me.

For the second time that day, I jolt to my feet. Like a deja vu the stairs disappear under my feet, the door flies open to the touch of my hand. Pat says something to me, but I'm already skirting the thin trail of bent grass, all the way to the barn. Then I'm left with nothing to face but the corral, and with that the prospect of saying or doing something, anything, that will convince my father to change his mind. There's no time. I step forward.

"Era." my father says through gritted teeth. His words drip with warning.

The other man turns slowly to face me. His features are dominated by wide-splayed eyebrows and a cheerful smile.

"Ah, we met the other day!" he says.

"I really don't think-"

"Yes, we have. It's a real pleasure," I say. An idea is beginning to form in my mind.

"Era, get back to you roo-"

It's the man's jolly laugh interrupts my father this time.

"I'm afraid I didn't catch your name," I add.

"People call me Jack. You can too."

Devany, on the other side of the rail, tosses his head. He's clearly unsettled, but also distinctly excited. His nicker to me spirals into a whinny. With a flash of his tail, he sets off trotting the length of the rail, neck arched. I wish I could tell him to stop showing off, to instead be mulish and mean.