BROKEN

- 2 -

hermione's pov

regardless of past events, hogwarts was beautiful. supported by magic good and bad. 

there was no in-between. 

hogwarts was where most people felt sane. where i felt as if i had a purpose. a home. my safe place. abused just as i was and found comfort in that.

the pain, though, remained through these walls. screaming and pleading for help as i was. just to be ignored and covered up with no remorse. 

* * * *

it was nearly 12. she had overslept which wasn't like her but she figured sleeping in wouldn't hurt considering she hadn't slept this well in months. running from everyone and everything. it wore her out so she stayed glued to her bed.

a knock sounded from her dorm. 

she said nothing. 

another knock sounded this time with a voice "hermione we know you're in there" harry said. "we've been looking for you all day" she felt bad after hearing those words leave ron but she couldn't motivate herself to get up and open the door.

the last thing she wanted to hear was 'are you okay?' 'why this what that'. she just wanted to sleep. 

before she could close her eyes again harry mumbled "alohomora" from outside the door and in came rushing in the two worried boys.

they tried but failed to get her out of bed. not because they wanted her to attend class, but because the sheets stank of moisture. 

she was knocked out as soon as her body touched the mattress yesterday, and sleep overtook her like a drug. even after a semi-sleep, the boys mentioned how weary she appeared. her mind was spinning as a result of the room being blurred.

"hermione, if you're going to be sick, please let me know-" before ron could finish his sentence, she puked all over his robes. harry and ron took her to the bathroom at a quick yet gentle pace, where she began to regurgitate more leftovers. 

ron rubbed her back, telling her 'everything was going to be okay' whilst harry grabbed a towel and for her to wipe her mouth before walking out to get her a clean pair of clothing and fresh linens.

* * * *

draco's pov

"it's just a nightmare..." i assured myself. "it's not real...it's not real anymore." 

i had believed that after everything i'd been through from getting the mark to being forced to do tasks for the dark lord, my childhood nightmares would go away, but i was mistaken.

for the hundredth time, my bed is drenched with sweat.

my pulse has quickened.

my mind feels like it's orbiting the room in spirals.

all alone with nobody to rub my back and tell me 'everything was going to be okay.'

however, i would rather do it this way than have everyone feel pity for me.

i mean, no one was ever there for me from the very beginning, so why should i care?

* * * *

hermione's face paled. 

at the realization of what ron and harry had just witnessed and how much she brought up. perhaps having them around to help wasn't such a bad thing after all, but she knew this couldn't be a regular occurrence, so she kept this side of herself hidden.

her vulnerable side.

to avoid any further disruptions from her friends coming into her dorm to check on her, she decided to freshen up and prepare for lunch. not to eat, but to sit with her peers. 

opening the doors of the hall she scanned the hall then began speed-walking to her seat to find harry and ron sat with the weasley's, oliver, dean, neville, and luna.

"hermione i haven't seen you in ages! i hope you don't mind, but i sat at your table today because mine gets rather dull" luna smiled. "no, of course, sit here anytime you want, better here than alone, right?" she attempted to joke.

luna was pretty polite to everyone around her, but she never made solid friends on the ravenclaw table, so she would switch to the gryffindor table from time to time.

"we didn't expect you to come out today. harry informed us of what had occurred. do you feel any better?" hermione paused before answering ginny's question. it was as if she could do it again on command, but she swallowed that sensation and responded, "i'm fine, thank you," followed by a brief reassuring smile to make it more convincing.

"thought you might be hungry" fred said "so we fixed you up a plate" george added putting the plate down in front of hermione. she thanked the twins turning back around to her now full plate.

she sat with the group for what felt like forever only being 10 minutes she excused herself leaving her half-eaten plate to leave early for her last lesson of the day. as much as she loved her friends she hated the pitiful eyes she received. 

* * * *

hermione's pov

it's not that i don't appreciate their assistance since i am tremendously fortunate to have such sympathetic friends, but they just don't understand. 

why would they? after all they don't appear to be bothered by the war any longer. 

everyone has moved on swiftly, so i don't want to dampen the atmosphere.

* * * *

walking the halls was a nightmare. the sicking twists and turns in her stomach. 

she managed to make it to the door slipping through scanning for a seat down the back. she stayed concentrated strictly on the work assigned for today's lesson as a way to distract herself from the unwelcome swirls in her abdomen.

after an hour, she wastes no time gathering her belongings and head to the nearest restroom. she didn't mind how many students she had to push past to get there. shoving the doors open she dumps her sachet on the dingy white tiles and dashes to the nearest stall, letting the bitter aftertaste of lunch go.

nothing except her sobs can be heard echoing through the empty bathroom. her head remained laying on the toilet seat. thinking of ways to avoid having to eat again if this would be the outcome as well as hiding the fact she wasn't fine. 

loathing the absence of her soul. 

hating on every scar, every sick feeling, and every event stained in her memory like red wine on white sheets.

sobbing caused her a headache, which she didn't need right now, so she got up from her now red knees, wiped her lips clean, flushed the toilet, and picked up her sachet on the way out down the corridor into the library, where she enjoyed to escape from reality.

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don't forget to: VOTE VOTE VOTE

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