4 Amish women and one house elf (GONE WRONG 😢😵😱)

😍😍😍

The sahara desert is brutally hot. The sun makes you wish you were able to store water like a camel.it makes you wish you had a brain tumor to store the water in. I know this because on one fateful day, my friends and I were LOST in  the boiling hot Sahara with a measly house elf named Dobby. We were all sweating in our Garfield halloween shirts from Wal-Mart (which was of course a part of our Amish dress code), but not Dobby. All he had was a single sweaty, juicy, stinky sock. “Dobby still does not understand why he could not get a Garfield halloween shirt as well”, cried Dobby. “Because you’re a stupid bitch who only wears socks, bitch.” Ryan shouted at him. We all nodded our heads in agreement as we continued to trudge through the barren desert. I took a tiny sip of Sprite from my crusty Wendy’s cup, just to realize that our last bit of liquid was gone forever. “Our last bit of liquid is gone forever!” I exclaimed. “What are we going to do?” “We could always drink Dobby’s blood?” suggested Maggie. “Dobby would appreciate it if you could please keep his blood inside his tiny body!” replied Dobby. Everyone laughed at his idiocy. Did he REALLY think we would drink his blood? “It was OBVIOUSLY a joke, dumbass,” said Natalie. “Your blood is probably absolutely disgusting anyways, I would rather DIE than drink YOUR blood. You probably have AIDS or something.” I rolled my eyes as I tied my curly auburn locks up into a ponytail. As we continued walking, the sun only got higher in the sky, and the air only got sticker. So sticky, in fact, that when I looked down at Dobby, I noticed that his tiny, scrawny nipples were nearly poking holes in his sock. “EW, Dobby! That is so disgusting!” Natalie screamed. Everyone else turned their heads down towards Dobby and started projectile vomiting immediately. “Does anyone happen to have a knife?” questioned Maggie, annoyed. “I want to cut his nipples off.” Ryan pulled out her fish pocket knife and looked at Dobby with an evil glint in her eyes, she was the epitome of the smiling devil emoji. As she leaned down to do the deed, I noticed something in the distance. “GUYS, OMG! LOOK!” I shouted, pointing to a tiny house in the distance. Everyone whipped their heads up to look at where I was pointing, and Dobby let out a tiny sigh of relief. We all rejoiced and started running towards it, despite us being famished. About halfway to the house, we realized it was a lot further than we thought it was. Several hours later, we reached the house and it was dark outside. We were all practically on the verge of death. We got inside and Ryan quickly went to check the cupboards, and the rest of us soon followed. After searching everywhere, the WHOLE house, we collapsed onto the floor in defeat. “Nothing. There’s nothing!” said Natalie. “We can’t just eat spices and raisins, that will probably kill us even faster.” replied Maggie. All of a sudden, Ryan got up and grabbed a book off of a shelf. “‘12 Ways to Cook a House Elf’,” She said in disbelief. “This is perfect!” We all got up and started jumping for joy. Then we heard a squeaky voice saying “Dobby has found a map! There is a store one kilometer from here! Dobby does not have to be cooked alive!” I glared at him. “We’re all tired Dobby, we just want to eat and sleep.” I explained. “Yeah, and we already have all the ingredients and the recipe, it's just easier for everyone.” said Maggie. “You’re literally so dramatic, Dobby. We just want to eat you so that we can stay alive. Do you want us to DIE Dobby?!” Natalie screamed. We all started fuming, smoke was streaming out of our ears. “That is IT! Now we’re DEFINITELY eating you. GET HIM!” I shouted. He zoomed away, and we all started chasing after  him. After chasing him for 14 hours, we finally caught him. “HA, FINALLY!” We all shouted simultaneously. Maggie snatched him up and threw him into a pot of boiling chicken broth. He tried to scream, but his head was underwater. We threw in some chopped vegetables, some spices, and some cheese. After 20 minutes, the House Elf Soup was done. Dobby had melted into the broth, the only remnants of him were the soggy cum sock floating on the top of the soup. Natalie took the lid off the pot and took out the cum sock while Ryan set the table for dinner. I put some soup into 4 bowls and served them up. We all slurped up our soup and licked our lips in delight. When we finished eating, we settled into beds that we found in the house and went to sleep. When we woke up in the morning, we were well rested and well fed. To make things even better, we had leftover Dobby soup for breakfast. As we were cleaning up from breakfast we got a knock on our door, and it was the rescue team! We flew away in the rescue team helicopter and we all lived happily ever after. Except for Dobby. We ate him.